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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To what extent should you make accommodations for "time blindness"?

325 replies

ChedderGorgeous · 23/01/2024 14:24

If a worker says they have "time blindness", what extent, if any, should you make accommodations for them in the workplace ? For example should they always have a 15 minute grace period for meetings and any agenda items involving them be moved to later in the meeting as a matter of course? Should you not be able to schedule meetings with them which are time critical ? My feeling is that if someone has "time blindness" then they should make changes in their day to day management to accommodate this in order to work as per their contract, rather like someone who gets the train, might get the train before , to ensure they get to work even if there are rail delays . AIBU ?

OP posts:
MyrrAgain · 23/01/2024 21:26

i’m sorry, is this actually a recognised disability? If so, I would wait HR to advise reasonable adjustments. And then I would be asking occupational health and HR for what those adjustment should be, because you are not the expert in time blindedness, nor can you make that decision. Wait to be guided by occupational health if it is in fact a diagnosed issue.

However, if you’re setting meetings for 1:15 that should’ve started at 1 o’clock,then, surely they would just be late for the 1:15 meeting as well?

Branleuse · 23/01/2024 21:26

I have really poor concept of time passing. I actually find it quite stressful. I used to be late for everything, but I've got strategies now. I have to make use of timers and Google calender reminders several times before I need to be somewhere. I am still late sometimes :(
I think that if someone knows they have time blindness then they need to work on it and find strategies. They can't realistically expect others to wait about for them all the time.

Bluebelz · 23/01/2024 21:27

None. I suffer from this and will often be a bit late into work…although my job is flexible so it’s not a problem. When I’m there however, I am able to use my calendar / watch to get to meetings on time or just a minute or two late.

I struggle actually getting out the house on time even if I know I’ll be held accountable. Thank god my job is flexible now. This caused me issues with certain managers when I was younger but I was always okay because I perform well when I get there!

smoldragons · 23/01/2024 21:33

Begsthequestion · 23/01/2024 18:09

Perhaps you should look into it, as I suggested.

You do understand that I have a ND diagnosis myself don't you? You aren't the authority on it all, there are a range of views.

orangeblosssom · 23/01/2024 21:48

Time blindness is real for many who have ADHD. We do give 15-30 minutes grace to one of our colleagues at work with this condition.

burnoutbabe · 23/01/2024 21:48

Suggest they always book in a pre meeting for 30 mins before any meeting they must attend?

So they get an alert and stop working on whatever and prepare for the actual meeting.

Now a lot of people work from home, more of us should block out 15 mins each hour or so between meetings. Rather than bounce from netting to meeting without time to have a break, send an important email or make a task list from meeting you just had.

2024GarlicCloves · 23/01/2024 21:49

EmilyTjP · 23/01/2024 14:30

YANBU.
This is a gen z tiktok thing that doesn’t exist in the real world. It’s up to them to sort, not for society to change to accommodate them.

I have it - am def not Gen Z at 68 😂 If I were a bit more Millennial, I might be diagnosed with ADHD or something. It's a bloody nightmare and, yes, I have missed flights, exams, surgeries, etc.

Managed to hold down good jobs and have a successful career. I did warn my employers before starting. Benefit is that it works both ends of the day - anyone who claims it only affects their start time is lying.

@ChedderGorgeous, with meetings it may work best to lie about the time it starts (my friends do this). Another approach is to start reminding them before they need to stop what they're doing, but I can see that being a burden.

Setting alarms doesn't work for me. Can't explain why: because I set it, I ignore it. Ask your time-blind person what will help?

Horriblescareydolls · 23/01/2024 21:52

The person just need to start growing up and thinking of ways to get there on time ie leaving earlier. How long can we go on "accommodating" every variable we would never get anything done.

Willyoujustbequiet · 23/01/2024 21:52

CoatRack · 23/01/2024 20:47

"It is a shame my child died, but the ambulance driver has map blindness and got lost. Can't be ableist and expect him to work a different job so what can you do?"

  • half the people on this thread apparently 🤨

That's pathetic

Just make a load of shit up about a dying child to justify your prejudice.

2024GarlicCloves · 23/01/2024 21:56

UnimaginableWindBird · 23/01/2024 17:32

I'm astonished by the number of posters here who don't believe this exists, and who say "ah, but I bet you' turn up in time for X" as though it's some sort of gotcha, I can safely say that no, we don't manage to turn up on time even for really important things. We can manage, with huge amounts of effort, but the effort required is such that we can't sustain it enough even for hugely important appointments and deadlines with life-changing consequences. Pretty much every one of those "I bet you'd be on time for X" examples is something I've failed to be on time for. I also turn up to work because I haven't realised I'm on annual leave, or arrive several hours early because I've got confused and left the house at the wrong time.

Yes, me too! I'd forgotten about turning up for work at the weekend, on holidays, and being insanely early. Also sending birthday presents weeks too late or early Confused

Elizadomuchly · 23/01/2024 22:02

Buy them a clock that dangles over the ear and announces the time audibly. Occ health should be able to order one.

Elizadomuchly · 23/01/2024 22:03

orangeblosssom · 23/01/2024 21:48

Time blindness is real for many who have ADHD. We do give 15-30 minutes grace to one of our colleagues at work with this condition.

Why don't you just put the meetings in his/her diary 30 minutes early? Problem solved.

bobomomo · 23/01/2024 22:03

Sorry but that isn't a real thing! Bad time management is not something we need to accommodate. Honestly what will they come up with next.

The person should try using the alarms on their phone to "cure" their condition

CoatRack · 23/01/2024 22:07

Willyoujustbequiet · 23/01/2024 21:52

That's pathetic

Just make a load of shit up about a dying child to justify your prejudice.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/grammar/rhetorical-devices-list-examples

You're welcome

31 Useful Rhetorical Devices

'Simile' and 'metaphor' are just the beginning

https://www.merriam-webster.com/grammar/rhetorical-devices-list-examples

bobomomo · 23/01/2024 22:07

Reasonable adjustments already exist, set reminders, and perhaps buy them a large clock!

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 23/01/2024 22:16

Begsthequestion · 23/01/2024 17:22

Most people, yes.

People with time blindness do miss flights though.

It's very common with ADHD, so common in fact that it is often referred to as part of the 'adhd tax' due to the extra expenses and loss of earnings it can cause.

No matter how much you try to mitigate it every single day of your life in everything you do, sometimes you have a bad day and you can miss really important things.

It's not a choice, or a moral failing. It's a symptom of a neurological disability.

This is absolutely fine, and I agree with how difficult it must be.

But the person in the OP’s example didn’t come across as trying everything but still occasionally failing, which would be understandable. They come across as just wanting to say “I have time blindness so I won’t even try, you all have to bend to me”.

Nofilteritwonthelp · 23/01/2024 22:17

None. Time blindness is BS. I honestly think if you do this you are a terrible manager and it's really unfair to the rest of the team, I would have no respect for you at all

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 23/01/2024 22:20

2024GarlicCloves · 23/01/2024 21:49

I have it - am def not Gen Z at 68 😂 If I were a bit more Millennial, I might be diagnosed with ADHD or something. It's a bloody nightmare and, yes, I have missed flights, exams, surgeries, etc.

Managed to hold down good jobs and have a successful career. I did warn my employers before starting. Benefit is that it works both ends of the day - anyone who claims it only affects their start time is lying.

@ChedderGorgeous, with meetings it may work best to lie about the time it starts (my friends do this). Another approach is to start reminding them before they need to stop what they're doing, but I can see that being a burden.

Setting alarms doesn't work for me. Can't explain why: because I set it, I ignore it. Ask your time-blind person what will help?

This is interesting because I do this too - if children are not needing to be picked up I will just carry on working on quite often.

As I mentioned above, my son has diagnosed ADHD.

I have been thinking about asking to go on the waiting list for an assessment but ironically keep not getting around to making the appointment with the GP to ask.

BertieBotts · 23/01/2024 22:21

GoldDuster · 23/01/2024 16:28

I think that people with dyslexia, it is in my family, probably shouldn't be going for a job where being good at reading is key.

If you know that you struggle with being on time, getting a job in which being on time for meeings is a skill you need isn't really common sense, it sounds incredibly stressful.

This is not about ableism, it's about knowing your strengths, accepting that not everybody is good at everything and living your life accordingly rather than throwing yourself at something you'll inevitably be shit at, and dealing with the fallout of that.

What jobs don't require being on time or ever communicating with other people, though? And don't say self employment.

I can't speak for everyone who struggles with this, but I tend to do much better in a structured environment where there are restrictions on time. I do benefit from some accommodations (most of which I've put in place myself) - visible clocks everywhere, a watch that beeps on the hour every hour, visual/digital calendars which sync, written reminders - any time someone asks me "Can you do this?" I always say "Yes - but send me an email please so I can put it in my diary".

ADHD is such a wide ranging disability that it's difficult to come up with jobs where there will be no impairment at all because it's not a narrow thing like a fear of heights. There are always going to be aspects of impairment in any job - and just like someone with dyslexia might choose not to go into a job which involves vast amounts of writing (though, I actually had a really brilliant English teacher at secondary school who was open about his dyslexia), they might still benefit from accommodations such as Grammarly, spellchecker, getting someone else to look over their written communication - you'll find there are jobs that ADHDers are brilliant at but need a bit more of a hand with some of the organisational aspects, which form a small part of the job.

BertieBotts · 23/01/2024 22:22

It is quite frustrating as well how dyslexia is seen as a legitimate difference in ability caused by things someone can't help whereas ADHD is seen as a load of lazy rubbish and excuses.

murasaki · 23/01/2024 22:24

A manager making other people work round this is not ok. They should talk to the person to get strategies in place to make it not happen, but it's not OK to have say 20 people work round one person's refusal to take strategies on board.

Alarms are easy to set.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 23/01/2024 22:24

CatPancake · 23/01/2024 19:01

Part of the reason diagnosis/difficulties increase is because modern life is just becoming more and more incompatible with ADHD.

its incorrectly named as a deficit of attention, when it’s better to be thought of as an inability to direct attention appropriately.

3 smart devices at our work station, multiple meetings, emails, priorities, responsibilities, social media, gaming apps, both adults at work, financial strain, home ownership stress etc etc

This makes a lot of sense to me.

InattentiveADHD · 23/01/2024 22:27

There's a lot of ignorant people on this thread.

Time blindness is part of having ADHD. You have no internal clock. It's one factor which means people with ADHD can be late often and also they means they find it very difficult to manage their time.

As an employer you have a responsibility to make reasonable adjustments. By definition these should be reasonable and I'm not sure what's being requested is as it would have a substantial impact on other people's time/day. You can't have people waiting around constantly for someone.

What helps with time blindness is clocks everywhere. People with ADHD should have prominent clocks everywhere and one on their wrist. In addition, you need alarms and reminders. Again they need to get clear and prominent. If you use outlook, the reminders on their are fucking pants for someone with ADHD. Too cluttered and so it's v hard to pick anything out so you tend to just click it away without realising.

I would say a reasonable adjustment could be prominent desk clock, a decent reminder system for meetings, and some additional allowance if systems fail and the person is late. Systems and strategies are helpful but they don't get rid of ADHD so if you rely on them and they fail you will fail. Some understanding when that happens would be very appreciated (certainly by me anyway!!).

Please bear in mind that ADHDers have to set A LOT of alarms and reminders. Too many gets overwhelming, stressful and you can start ignoring all of them when they are going off constantly. They therefore have to be prioritised. So important things get perhaps a calendar item, a to do, and multiple alarms, if it's less important it gets one alarm and just stored in one place, if it's not that important it just goes on a list(s) that I try to check every few days. I might set alarms in two places. For example on my work computer and on my personal mobile.

Sometimes you have to fuck things up a few times to realise that something needs a higher priority! And sometimes you have to play around with calendar items, to do lists and alarms to work out what works. ADHDers find it difficult to work this stuff out in our heads, we have to do by trial and error.

It would also be so helpful if people understood the effort that all takes and how long it takes. It's time consuming (and difficult) to manage your executive functions outside your head. Any support or technology you are able to provide as an employer which support with that is going to help your employee be less stressed and more productive.

It may be an idea to access an Access to work assessment for your employee. They can do an assessment to suggest reasonable adjustments and help fund them.

To be fair to your employee, they may be asking for this as they don't actually know what's available to support them. I hear this a lot on ADHD forums. People ask for the "wrong" things at work (or don't know what they can ask for at all conversely) because they don't understand what's available and how to access it.

Atethehalloweenchocs · 23/01/2024 22:28

The other problem with the concept of time blindness is that too many people take the piss about timings anyway so it is hard to know when it is genuine. I used to manage a team where I instituted weekly meetings, and at the beginning half of the team showed up late because they had no concept of other peoples time being as valuable as their own. The first few times latecomers would ask me to recap on what we had discussed and I explained that I would not waste the time of the people who showed up on time, and that meetings would start on the dot. Out of the 7 offenders, all managed to come on time going forwards. I'm not adverse to making adjustments, but too many people have poor time keeping with no good excuse. And as said earlier, reasonable help and adjustments are one thing, but surely the whole point is that people can manage to function in the world, not that the world has to change around them? I cant imagine a trade negotiation or government meeting starts late because someone cant get there on time.

Passingthethyme · 23/01/2024 22:29

murasaki · 23/01/2024 22:24

A manager making other people work round this is not ok. They should talk to the person to get strategies in place to make it not happen, but it's not OK to have say 20 people work round one person's refusal to take strategies on board.

Alarms are easy to set.

Exactly, it's called a watch!