To ask her not to do any washings

[Lolly188888]

My ds and dd stay overnight at my parents house a couple of times per month, which I am extremely grateful for. My lovely mum insists on washing the clothes that they have worn and returns them to me clean and dried. My ‘issue’ is, she doesn’t separate the whites and colours and numerous baby vests and socks have been return to me very grey. AIBU to ask her not to wash their clothes? I know she is just trying to be helpful. Do I buy specific vests/socks for when they go there?

Talk to your mum. I look after my dgs for 3 days/2 nights per week. I wouldn’t have a problem if my dd talked to me about any aspect of looking after my dgs.

With a few exceptions (shirts and a few items of underwear, mostly) I never separated the whites and darks at home because I'm lazy.
I'd be delighted if someone did some washing for me. If I was worried about colours running (which, for kids everyday clothes, I'm not), I'd just make sure to send the kids in only coloured/only white clothing.
If your kids are developing a rash from the laundry detergent, that's another matter.
Either provide your mum with the detergent (and show her the resulting rash if she doesn't) or just stick to rewashing clothes.