It's not the fat, it's how in proportion you are?

[BigPurpleJumper]

I think most people know 'that bigger woman' that is glamorous and beautifully maintained and most people agree they are attractive.
I have noticed that all of the women I know like this are all very much in proportion, even if they are very large.
I find this particularly frustrating as I carry my weight on my stomach and have twiggy legs in comparison to my larger upper half.
Unfortunately even when I loose the weight it comes off my legs/bum and boobs before starting to shift off my stomach so I look really odd even loosing the weight!
Is it possible to look glamorous/attractive/well maintained if your body will never be in proportion or am I doomed to always look slightly odd?

Same as you, op, the weight sits on the tum. Hard to wear dresses

Also short legs vs a long body. I think parts of me are OK, no cellulite, arms are not flabby, bust has not sagged - but sadly these things are in isolation.

OP how about googling what to wear for your body shape? My SIL is a slimmed down apple and she always looks great. Bias cut skirts look really nice on her where as they can look a bit iffy on pears.

Thank you for all of the suggestions, I will start googling!!!

I have always struggled with my weight, I am a size 10 now but I have been anything from 8-14 UK. I have an hourglass figure which makes it easier to look good even if a bit overweight. I do carry a lot of fat in my legs and arms and have a very small waist so I often feel like my arms "don't match" I have learned to love my body though, when I was younger I wouldn't even wear sleeveless tops and I used to live in a very hot country ...

I think you're being hard on yourself and judging yourself harshly against others. So your mum and sister are naturally slimmer than you, it doesn't mean that you aren't attractive or look good. And there's no way at 5ft 10 inches (my height too) that you are a dumpling. I've found that finding out my body type was very helpful, old fashioned but the Trinny and Susanah quiz is good. I'm a goblet so big boobs, wide shoulders and slender hips and lean legs. Apparently so is Catherine Zeta Jones/Douglas, so I google what works for her and keep my eye out for similar shapes/styles.

Just to add, I'm no where near as slim but the same rukes/suggestions apply.

I'm the same, even at my skinniest my legs, bum and hips are huge and there is no hiding it. I'm short and also small framed everywhere else so I just look shit in everything unless you only look at my top half. Although thanks to 2 c sections I now have an overhang which I'm also self conscious about.

It doesn't help that people of all kinds comment on how I look entirely unsolicited. To be fair it's usually how they would love a bum like mine because theirs is flat and I'm like have some!!

I’m a short overweight (recent slimmed down) hour glass, I have widish shoulders and hips and a defined waist. Mid thigh clothes suit me if I wear opaque tights and also fairly short tops.
I never wear sleeveless clothes but do like off the shoulder items.

Just noticed this comment, it is really flipping hard not to compare yourself to your sister when she looks like a sodding nordic goddess!
Honestly, the attention she got when we were younger was ridiculous and I was always surplus to requirements.
I have always known where I stood with regards to my attractiveness... I shouldn't complain really (and don't IRL!!) as I have a husband and two beautiful children. I just can't help but feel I got the short straw in my family!

I completely understand, my sister was always the slimmer one, traditionally attractive, out going and had many boyfriends, I didn't 'bloom' until my 20s. I was a tubby teenager often mistaken for a boy. Out of 4 of us I was always the tubby one. No one was interested in me! It didn't help that my mum was also very slim when younger, so looking at things like her wedding dress was always hard as my sister would have fitted it, but not me. Little things like that always got me down.

@brightyellowflower I agree about the apples! I look at women at yoga who are heavier than me weight wise but have lovely, slim cellulite free legs. They wear shorts & a flowy top and look great. I’m 9 stone with slim shoulders/arms & a flattish tum but my massive cellulitey arse & hips means I struggle with what to wear and look horrendous in shorts.

I’m feeling this too. I just lost nearly three stone and brought my bmi down to 22, but I still have two distinct stomachs sat on top of each other and although my back band has come down my cup size is up so total boob volume is also refusing to reduce.

my waist size is still above the ‘risky’ range so I’m still trying to lose a bit more weight and have started lifting in the gym, but it’s so frustrating! My size 12 jeans still need to be unbuttoned to be comfy when I sit down. Meanwhile I have a thigh gap so they look baggy down there.

at least a good control garment can make it look like I’ve got a waist, and I’ve got the legs for wearing short dresses when I can make that happen.

@BigPurpleJumper I am one of those people! I'm not bragging, at least 3 stone overweight & have always been on the curvier side. I'm quite broad shouldered as well. People tend to be a bit flabbergasted when I tell them my weight or dress size. It takes practice, I've probably watched every program, podcast & read countless articles. I think about everything I buy, had a few disasters when I've turned sideways & looked at myself in a shop window. I'm on top of my personal grooming & do everything I can to help my own self confidence. Accessories can hide a lot & divert people's eye line. We're all beautiful in our own way!

I think it’s just a big stomach in all honesty, it doesn’t look great on anyone however ‘proportional’ it may be. It isn’t natural for humans to carry excessive weight, particularly around the midriff so it doesn’t look good. This isn’t just women, men with a big gut don’t look great either.

Sounds like me. BMI of 15 so really underweight and yet I still had chunky thighs. I think it must be lipodema. Weirdly I think my legs are best when I am slim but not skinny. The rest of the time they look out of proportion and now I am a size 14 - they make me look like I am much heavier than I am

My legs are fine, I have a 34 inch leg and (for my weight, ridiculously skinny ankles🤣)
Maybe I just need the fashion to change back to billowing corsetted dresses and I'll be fine!