To not attend school video meeting at 8pm?

[glossypeach]

i have a four year old who’s due to start reception in September. His nursery, in which hopefully he will attend the reception there, is having a group video call meeting at 8pm a day next week. It’s to discuss what to expect within the education next year.

anyway, am I being unreasonable to think this is a ridiculous time, especially for parents of young children? My son has suspected adhd and he does not sleep of a night until a silly time and I’m a single parent so I have no one to ask to look after him to attend the meeting at that time. So I obviously cannot attend.

I do think a lot of the time, they don’t take into account single parents. Even if I wasn’t, I’m sure other parents with partners who are working or other kids to attend to, etc will not be able to attend. It just seems a bit unreasonable timing.

They're taking into account single parents by holding it after work for the majority, after dinner for the majority, after bedtime for the majority and by making it on Zoom, rather than in person.

There's no finding babysitters, no going out in the cold, no missing it because you're at work, no excluding 99% of the dads, ensuring that nobody gets to monopolise a staff member for ages, possibly recording it for anybody who can't attend, parents with disabilities are likely to be able to hear/read subtitles/attend in the first place.

They've included practically everybody except the occasional shift worker (who might be able to listen in on earbuds anyway), the person who is unable to use a phone/computer (but almost certainly had to be able to use one in order to make an application in the first place) and except the occasional non working parent of a child who doesn't go to bed until much, much later than 9pm or one who, whatever time or setup they choose, will find fault with the situation.

1. During the day would mean that parents could not get childcare or would be at work.
2. After school time would be a problem for childcare of older siblings and getting kids to clubs etc.

They are no doubt doing this to help out and of course people are complaining still...
Put your audio on mute, turn off camera and listen. What could be easier?

What a brilliant school for actually doing something at a sensible time.

Almost all preschool children will be in bed and fast asleep by 8pm.

And it's just a video call so no need to get childcare or leave the house

I am a Lp - of a child with ADHD .

what time would be best for you . My Ds at that age would be in his room even if not sleeping .

Stick Paw Patrol on for your kid and listen with earphones + camera off.
My kids were never asleep at 7:30pm either.

All my three would have been asleep by then at that age - I'd be cooking dinner for me and DH. (One of mine has ADHD too)

There’s no time that suits everyone.

I suspect that 8pm is convenient for the majority as kids will have gone to bed and parents have finished work. Tbh I am surprised that they’ve considered working parents as the school my kids went to held meeting like this in the afternoon.

There will be parents like you who can’t make 8pm because they work, be ill and in bed or have another commitment. Have you considered putting on earphones and turning the camera off?

There wont be a time that works for everyone.

During the working day people struggle

During school run tume people struggle

During tea time people struggle

I imagine 8pm was picked as a strong chance it was past bedtime for 4 year olds or at least sit in front of the tv time.

8pm will work for most families, but not single parent of ADHD and likely a handful of other families with specific circumstances. You will find yourself advocating for your child and balancing home life many times over as you navigate the education system, send an email to school to let them know that this time is really tricky and that you will try to listen in on zoom with camera off (if you can) and ask if school can provide a written meeting summary to all if you miss some or all of it. If you know any other parents who will attend, kindly ask them to take notes and share.

But when would be better then?

I doubt there is a time that suits everyone and would have thought most people would prefer 8pm as a lot of children will be in bed by then.

What time would you be able to attend?

You are going to have inconvenient school meetings for your child’s entire school career. An 8pm zoom meeting is nothing and you can manage. You won’t be expected to be on camera. Just listen.

My child used to go to bed at 9.15 so that would have been rubbish for me. But I would just do as others have suggested - no camera on and just listen. I hate group online meetings so would have done that anyway. All the school meetings I have been to over the years have been in person, and there are always people who can't make it but you should still be able to get hold of the information afterwards.

You can attend, just put yourself on mute with the camera off and have a headphone in, set up something on the tv or some kind of toy and crack on. No time is going to be perfect, but its not an in school meeting, so its easy to do some work arounds and listen while doing other things.

I'd be so happy with this. You wait till the school continually asks you to attend stuff during the working day at short notice...

if its just an info session can you maybe download it ?

Well I for one feel sorry for the poor teacher who has to organise this in their own time after they have worked all day. There’s so much work goes into organising these meetings by teachers and admin staff just suck it up and attend if you’re interested.

For the vast majority this time is by far the easiest as most are asleep & zoom means no childcare needed.

anyway, am I being unreasonable to think this is a ridiculous time, especially for parents of young children?

What time do YOU think it should have been?

You are going to have inconvenient school meetings for your child’s entire school career.

This in a nutshell.

YANBU not to attend, however I think they have probably chosen 8pm because for most parents of NT 3/4 year olds this is past bedtime and is probably a good time for a call, it will be easier for most parents to do a call once the kids are in bed compared to earlier in the day. Obviously it is unfortunate for you that you are a single parent with a child who doesn’t sleep until late, but in that case what would be a convenient time for you? 9pm? 10pm? Do you really think they would be more reasonable times for most parents?

Out of curiosity what time would be convenient?
Between school hours most people are at work.
Afterschool 3-5 lots of people still at work and of not will have children around
6 dinnertime
7 bath and bedtime

Surely you can see that 8pm is the best time to holdnit

What time do you think would suit most parents?

My dc used to go to bed at 7pm at that age so it would be ideal for me and single parents in the same situation.

I am having a good old giggle to myself here. On Sunday I am dropping my DS off at school at 4.30am to go on a school trip. Give that one a go OP and then see how you feel about an 8pm zoom call😂🤣😂