To be so worried about money

[Farnellap]

Single parent with unreliable ex. Nursery is crippling me. They’ve just put up their fees to 72 a day. I’m paying 1,550 in childcare, 1,200 mortgage, have 4K debt on interest free that I’m trying to pay off, heating bill was 280 last month despite barely having it on at all, council tax is 150 with the discount, car loan 120. I earn 4K after tax a month and the job is hard. I feel like everything is fucking pointless. Dc is 2 in October and so free hours for a long time yet. I want to give up on everything, I am so sad and stressed I don’t know what to do.

Well the obvious thing would be to through the CSA and ensure DCs father is paying what they should. But I know it isn't always that easy in practice.

I would pay the minimum debt for now, just keep moving it to 0% cards and tackle it once your childcare costs reduce. Just obviously try to avoid borrowing more.

Can you take a 6 month payment holiday from your mortgage? Save what you can, maybe £800 per month, to go towards your mortgage payments once they resume.

Just whatever you can do to get through this period of high childcare costs - things will ease up considerably once the free hours start and again when DC is at school.

I totally feel you OP. I feel like we are working 24/7 and have nothing left after bills/food/constant car repairs etc.

what would the balance look like if you dropped a days work and took kids out of childcare for that day? You might not be financially better off but you might feel more balanced.

I’m so sorry, that sounds very hard.

Could you temporarily reduce your mortgage payment by going interest only or extending the length of the loan? Would paying for your energy be cheaper by DD so the expensive months are paid for throughout the whole year? I’d also shelve the debt for now and keep it on 0% interest but definitely not add to it.

You will get through this and easier times will come but in the meantime have a virtual hug.

Similar situation.

i managed by switching my mortgage to interest only while my children were in nursery.

is your car loan interest free? If not I’d pay that asap and keep refinancing on 0% as long as possible.

you earn relatively well though, so once nursery is over in 2/3 years you’ll get a big chunk of that back with only wraparound to sort.

I'm sure you are but are you using tax free childcare?

So sorry to read this. Very difficult situation. As others have suggested, look at temporarily reducing mortgage payments through mortgage holiday or increasing term.

It’s a moment in time. It will get better.