To be panic stricken over DH and BIL buying kayacs to take 6 month old DS out on?!*

[MoominMarvelous]

DH seems o think I am! MIL / FIL own a holiday home by the sea and suggested buying a boat for family outings. Seemed like a great idea and I was well up for it and had visions of us all singing 'row row row your boat' as we went off for little adventures in the boat together with DS sat on my knee.

The boat idea has now morphed into buying two sit on kayaks that take up to three people which they reckon will be more 'fun'. I am petrified! Maybe I am being unreasonable but I feel the safety risks associated with kayaking far outweigh those of being in a 'standard' boat. But to be fair I don't know much about it.

Any thoughts anyone?!*

FYI I am taking DS to learn how to swim on a 10 week course starting in April. But he's only 6 months old!!!!!!!! I can feel the panic welling up again just thinking about it. But don't want to be a party pooper

Men can be so clueless sometimes...... I would so say No and if he debates, ask him how he would feel if something tragic happened.

When FIL tried not to 'debate' even but to insist that ds1 was being deprived of a nice activity with his grandad. I just said 'I'm sorry the matter is not open for discussion. My decision is final'.

Did the trick.

Whenever he has mentioned it since I just enquire politely whether he has learned to swim properly yet and that shuts him up.

when they get the kayaks get a sack of sand a similar size to your ds and get them to take that out. tell them ds can only go on it if they manage to take the sack with them and return it totally dry. Might be a good way of making the point? maybe also draw a smiley face on it, and point out that if the nose and mouth gets wet then potentially that's your ds, having drowned.

YEY!!!!!!!!!! Thanks all!!! SO pleased I'm not being a party pooper!

On the advice of snowleopard, I rang the British Canoe Union who said it seemed crazy but best to speak to the coastguards for the specific area.

The coastguard said it was 'foolhardy at best' and agreed with theapprentice that ds should really be 4 yrs + before going out on the sea on a kayak - sit on or not.

He agreed that a motorised boat was a different kettle of fish entirely but still said that until a child can swim well, the most he would advise would be a rubber dingy in knee high water (adult knee!).

His main concern was with water temperature as the sea doesnt warm up until October and even if air and surface temperature FEEL ok, 3ft down it's completely different. He said in 99% of outings, things would probably be fine but in that 1% of cases when 'things go wrong' for whatever reason, it was highly likely to be serious if not fatal for such a young child.

I shall be passing all of this on to DH tonight and can feel confident standing my ground! So thanks to everyone who responded! And good luck to everyone else having similar issues with DHs, DPs, FILs etc!!!

I have been tempted to put a little hole in fil's canoe, would solve the problem once and for all .....evil

LOVING titchy's idea!!! Maybe you cud try that flibbertyjibbet?!* Although it would be AWFUL if he brought it back dry and 'well'!!!!!!! ;)

Safety aside - your ds probably finds being sung to and bounced up and down on dh's knee far more fun than being taken out on an unsteady vessel into cold, open water....

I'm mystified as to why anyone would want to take a baby out on a kayak. Hardly going to be relaxing is it?

Good grief. If ever there was a thread that could prove that men are stupid, this is it.

Good for you for having some sense.

YANBU. Not until your DS can swim - if it were me then not even then. I am afraid I would put my foot down.

Far too young.

This is exactly the reason why we feel very protective of our new babies. Because in the back of our minds we're aware of these MAD IDEAS forming, like canoeing with a 6 month old baby, or introducing it to a previously unknown dog in a blase and irresponsible manner, or letting go of the pushchair for a few seconds on a hill for A LAUGH. Really it's a definite phenomenon that I've observed this flirting with danger in the early months and I can say it's a situation of polarities. To us everything's DANGEROUS and UNWISE. To them everything's PERFECTLY SAFE and we're BEING NEUROTIC. It's a difficult one and needs careful handling and do try to be reasonable yourself as much as possible but don't let ANYONE tell you you've got to feel ok about putting your baby in a risky situation. You are programmed to protect your child and there is NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT.

We took our elder 2 on sea kayaks when they were 4 and 2 - both non swimmers at that stage, but it was here in Denmark in a shallow protected 'fjord'. ie almost a lagoon - no tide, no rocks, warmish water. They absolutely loved it, had lifejackets on of course and were tucked into the hatches. But in UK waters I wouldn't dream of it!

Is there a handy grandparent to babysit while the grown-ups (or 'not-so-grown-ups?) splash about?

DP is a kayaker but there's no way he's taking either of our DSs out with him till they're at least 6. DS1 is 5.5 and i'm feeling nervous already.
6 months? Absolutely no way.

Ok at first I was going to say YABU, as I've been taking DS on the back of an open sea kayak out in the open sea with me since he was two, but, having read the other poss and done some thinking, I think it is a silly idea. Even at 2 DS was bored after 20 minutes of sitting still with nothing but sea around him, what's a 6 month old going to do?!

Tell your DH and BIL that there will be plenty of time for bonding in sea kayaks in a few years, but for now, your DS is still a baby. It's not worth the risk of him falling in.

6 Lyra? Why wait that long?

Because I'm nervous of water and neither of my DSs can swim yet. Six is young imo but DP doesn't think so.

ive been kayaking loads of times and they turn over very easily wouldnt put my 2.7 year old on one much less a six month old

Fair enough. I've only taken DS out on clear days with a calm sea. Never had it turn over with DS in it, but if it made me nervous I wouldn't do it. I don't think sea kayaking could ever be described as 'fun' for a 6 month old.

DS can't swim yet but obviously always has a lifejacket on. There's a pic in my profile

I'm not a kayaker but an ex()rower and I think your DH is mad to want to take a 6 month old out. I was taken out sailing from young age but only in a large dinghy which was practially impossible to capsize. If you husband says anything more try telling him that cold water immersion (spelling?) even for an adult can start to take affect in about two minutes and cold water in survival terms means 25 degrees or below.

Or just remind him that cold, wet, bored baby isn't any fun.

6months old?? Apart from any safety issues, what's the point of taking a baby on a kayak??

That would be a big fat I Said No from this lady

on the subject of protective instincts, when exp let go of ds1's pram on a hill "For fun" it took every ounce of my self control not to rip the skin of his face off with my fingernails and make him eat it, but I wasn't able to stop myself screaming "YOu FUCKING IDIOT, were you dropped at FUCKING BIRTH? Does your mother know what a FUCKING MORON she's raised, you could have KILLED him!"

ahem