Is husband being selfish about relocating

[Sugarandspice85]

Hi,
long story short my husband and I looked into relocating from the uk to nz-Hamilton, with our 3 kids (under 10) after the job offer which was very good, and once things started becoming very real I decided after all that perhaps moving from family and support wasn’t the best idea for us as a family- I find some days hard with three kids, dog, house and job and think I would’ve struggled being on the other side of the world. Also my husband was thinking ‘forever’ whilst I knew it would only be temporary- I don’t want to live on the other side of the world and never come back. I know that in my heart.
all along my husband was saying ‘it needs to be right for all of us or we don’t go, it has to be 100%’ but now he’s trying to guilt me into the move, saying that he can’t stand anything about the uk, and our life here, and that this would have been our ticket to a better new life.
for info we have a lovely (mortgaged) house in the south east, kids in good schools, nice area.
Aibu to think that he needs to see it as an opportunity that wasn’t right for us all, or am I being selfish for not sucking it up and going?

"Bear in mind@RandomMessmessage- once you go there your DC become automatic citizens and you can't take them out of the country without your DH's say so.

They really don't become citizens. Our children always had the same residence visa as we did when we lived in NZ.

A little biased here as I love New Zealand and have family out there. It's a little expensive (but where isn't at the moment lol) but the quality of life is amazing and the opportunities for families are outstanding. I know if given the opportunity to relocate there I would do it in a heartbeat. I think not even giving it a go is a shame.

That said op. While I don't necessarily think either of you are wrong I do know that I would not be reliant on another person in a foreign country and if I did go I would set a hard limit of revaluating the situation every year. It has to work for both of you.

Did it and missed my family terribly. You must be a strong support of eachother when you make the move. This means both fully on board and able to support eachother when it gets hard and it will. Otherwise you'll feel trapped there don't do it.