To want to know if he hacked my iphone

[loandbehold24]

I'm currently going through a contentious child custody battle, with a coercively controlling abusive exhusband.

Over Christmas his communication changed. I can't go into revealing details, but on countless occasions he knew things that he could not possibly have know (unless he had been listening to my private conversations, with different people in lots of different places). I began to suspect my phone had been hacked.

I noticed the following

• Unusual log in to my gmail (a log in on a phone model that I do not possess)
• Emails being mysteriously deleted (that portrayed him in negative light)
• Unusual app on my phone that I didn't download
• App permissions on my phone had all changed (microphone and camera turned on for every app)
• Battery draining within an hour and phone often felt very hot
• Data Use soared, (25GB used in 3 days when I had just been using my phone for whatsapp, camera and spotify

I am now convinced my phone has been hacked but need to find a way to prove it. I've contacted apple but they just send me articles on phishing.

Does anyone know of a cyber security expert in London, who can scan my phone for malware?

If he has hacked my phone, the invasion of privacy is enormous (13000 photos, access to emails, location history, etc) He will know my strategy for court and have such an edge.

Any advice very much appreciated.

I would go to the police

Did you record your passwords anywhere. The chances of guessing passwords etc is extremely low. You would have had warnings.

Did you look at 'find my iPhone' ? That would have shown all the devices using your account.

Are you sure no one in your household got a new iPad or phone ?

Did he take one of your old phones or iPads with him.

It seems a bit odd.

The hacker got into their email and then changed the password to their iCloud. iCloud holds a copy of everything on the phone / ipad. A hacker would never have got into their Apple devices.

It's most likely they got a list of passwords and emails from a PR company or something first who would have posted content on behalf of clients.

I think they worked out who that company was but I don't remember names.

Also, if you google "Your data is ready to be moved to your new iphone, but some apps aren't included. You can change this in iCloud settings. Your free iCloud storage will expire in 13 days" it looks like it can be triggered by other things.

What was the weird app that was downloaded?

contact the non emergency police number to log your concerns about phone and him accessing your home - unsure if liste ing devices left etc.

Go to Apple Genius Bar (make an appointment) and get help from them with the cloud etc. they may have some specialist help available.

do you have any Alexa etc devices. He could be using them.

OP - Did you ever get to the bottom of this? It's really scary what people can do with technology these days

Women also need to take some responsibility for learning and understanding tech. It’s not enough to say ‘ooh, I don’t understand phones and computers, I’ll leave all that to DP’.

Having an adequate understanding of technology doesn't usually extend to the ability to hack other people's personal devices

OP, did you get to the bottom of this? I hope it was nothing sinister and you’re ok.

It was too expensive to have my phone examined. I switched to android. I did report to the police and followed their advice to use the authenticator app to secure all of my accounts. It was an email breach.

Has he behaved in a way that indicates he knows you know since you locked everything down?

He doesn’t need to “hack” it per se. He just needs a mirroring app on your device home and his and the log in details to your Apple ID.

My ex installed key logging software on my laptop. his sister told me after he finally moved out. I should have called the police but I was so grateful he had gone.

There are several key logging apps for iPhone but he would have to have been hold of your phone to add them. I’m wondering if they have been there since you were together. Sounds like the sort of thing my ex would have done. He guessed all my passwords too, and had my data to get resets so I was fining him popping up everywhere, really invasive.

Can all the pedantic IT Crowd Apple fans just shut up about "how it's almost technically impossible to hack an iPhone, actually."

The OP needs some advice about her ex stalking her and accessing her confidential information, not an advert for how secure an iPhone is. It's not been secure for her.

It's easy. And if he's this kind of person as PP suggested he may have already done this long ago

Sounds like you’ve gotten good advice offline so far. What you described is very plausible and also quite scary.

I would wan to think through next steps carefully. Report to police might tip him off that you know. I think you definitely should report it along with him breaking into your house. But time it the way you want it.

Is he dangerous? Someone that would do this seems unhinged to me.

You can clone a phone though. If he knows what he’s doing he could have cloned it to a spare phone so that he gets all your messages etc but I don’t know how you would prove this

I have two iPhones on the same account and an iPad. One phone is old but I mainly use it for banking and it is always at home. No telephone number associated to it. Emails can be read from there. If you have a pc at home you can log into your WhatsApp from there so maybe he has got hold of your phone and loggged in your WhatsApp on a pc - if he knows your passwords for email and has another iPhone he could be logged in to your emails.

Sorry missed the bit about the new device

I'm digressing here but would appreciate advice.

The latest turn of events is my DD returned with bruise on her inner arm in a finger shape. It was clear she'd been dragged. She's 30 months old. She also had one on her upper thigh the week before. I told the social worker as a Section7 report is being completed for Child Arrangements Proceedings. She could have just run off and needed to be grabbed to keep her safe but no explanation was given.

On Sunday, my ex sent me a pic of a bruise on DD's inner leg and made accusations. We had been at soft play on Saturday with some boisterous older children. At one point, they bounded over her on the trampoline, so I assumed it happened there and explained.

Social Worker investigated. Nursery saw no bruise on Monday. Ex still refused to accept my explanation and refused to send updated pictures of the bruise. Social worker advised I make a GP appointment for a professional medical opinion. I did so immediately. Ex strongly opposed the GP appointment. Later in the morning, his mother messaged and said the bruise had disappeared when she changed DD's nappy Tuesday morning.

The bruise was fabricated. I'm a health care professional, and this false accusation could have had very serious ramifications for my career.

My issue is how do I proceed. I have limited money for legal fees. My ex is not held even slightly accountable for emotional abuse , invasions of privacy, fabricated bruises..

It's all minimised as "they can't get along." I have constantly tried to compromise. A high conflict , malignant narcissist, cannot compromise. He revels in conflict and ruining my day.

It's impacting DD, and that devastates me.

Any advice on how to handle this would be greatly appreciated.