To think DS5 should be closer to swimming by now?

[greaj]

DS turned 5 in October.

He's been attending weekly, 30 min swimming lessons since April 2023.

I feel he has made barely any progress, he is miles and miles off being able to swim without a float.

The instructors just pull the kids from one side of the pool to the other and give minimal tips or direction.

I have looked at taking him elsewhere, but they are so full that even the waiting list is closed.

Am I expecting too much? What age could your kids swim independently?

She has not long turned 5 and is now on stage 4 and can swim all strokes (albeit her butterfly isn't perfect)

^

Lol

Reminds me of of the time my Chinese friend was talking to her 5 year old in Chinese: I was really impressed.

' Yeah it's only simplified Chinese though', she said

🫡

My 8yo does lessons in a group of kids who all look about the same age, they might be tall 6yo but I think they're 7-8. Honestly a lot of the time you can tell they're trying but they don't have the control over their limbs to make them work. We didn't start lessons until 7 and they made visible progress, maybe I left it a bit too late but I can't think of much more soul destroying than paying for zero progress week in week out!

Is it swim by any chance?! If so I've literally just pulled my two and started taking them myself. Useless.

If you can have a hot holiday this year where he is in the pool every day - just messing about - it really helps with confidence and ability.

Mine all seemed to languish in the bottom group for ages and then they got it after about 2 years (age 7/8). But I did take them to the council pool on weekends sometimes and we also have family in a holiday location.

Some swimming schools are better than others though. I took mine out of the Council one as they had tonnes of kids and didn't seem to do much with them.

If you're in the West Midlands area, this school is good: www.s4swimschool.uk

I think getting them to start learning at this age is hard and a mistake. We had the exact same problem with DD and to be honest, I'm still annoyed that while I asked DH time and time again to take her swimming before that (he was primary carer at the time) he didn't. The result was that it took her ages to learn, made worse by the fact that her learning was interrupted by Covid.

On plus side, just keep persisting. There absolutely is a "Eureka" moment with swimming. And I agree with a PP - you need to be taking him swimming outside of lessons. It's really important to get them used to it and enjoying it.

My 8 year old recently diagnosed asd and adhd still can't swim despite nearly 2 years of lessons. He has only managed to finally jump in without holding the teachers hand and put his face in the water.
He's in a small group but it's still expensive. So tempted to stop the lesson. He moans constantly about them. I didn't learn until I was 13 and still hate it so I was adamant both mine would learn properly.

I think your expectations are too high - it can take them awhile. My ds1 is nearly 9 and has had swimming lessons for 2.5 years. He can swim independently very well and can do the strokes but he doesn't have a huge amount of stamina - he needs to move up to a bigger pool soon but he has been on the waiting list for our nearest one for about 8 months. I reckon we are a good 2 years away from him being able to swim the 25 metres or whatever the recommendation is because of the waiting lists.

My ds2 I thought would learn quicker because he loves the water but he isn't very strong - he's nearly 6 but tiny. He's had lessons for 1,5 years but isn't progressing as quicker as ds1 did, I think because he was younger when he first started.

I gave up hope if mine ever getting to the top of the waiting list and taught her myself at 4/5.

If you have a pool with steps going into the water it's the easiest place to get them to start pushing off. I just stood a couple of meters away and she started doing a few strokes to me which we increased.

Learning to take a breath is harder. My neighbour gave me one of those suits with the flat floats in it. When we went to a caravan park with a pool she used that for the first couple of days then when I took it off her she could stay afloat herself. Not with a technique that would win prizes but definitely understanding how to float and we've worked on the rest.

Does remind me I really must take them again though!

My daughter was 5 in September and can swim 10 meters without any swimming aid. She been having lessons since she was 2.5

My daughter could swim properly by the time she has just turned 6. I thought it was a really important skill for her to have and money was very tight at the time, so I took her swimming a couple of times a week and taught her myself. I gave her an incentive for swimming a width on her own by telling her she could have a hamster when she managed to do it 😆😆

I used to teach swimming and am lifelong swimmer. 8 months of lessons at that age is not long so don't worry - but from how you described the lessons, I'd maybe look elsewhere (unless he loves it there, in which case you can progress him with your own swims outside of lesson time). Swimming schools often have very different teaching styles.

I wasn't put in lessons myself until I was about 4 or 5, whereas my siblings were put in younger - which is much better.

I used to teach babies from 5 weeks old (!) obv mum/dad in the water too. But babies are so natural in water. I had one who'd been in from 5w who was swimming 15m lengths unaided and without breathing at 2yo. Incredible.

If I'm lucky enough to have kids (trying!) I'll have them in the water before 2 or 3yo. ❤️🌊

I’ve found swimming lessons are really poor. I would advise anyone against lessons with the teacher in the water. They’re too hands on and don’t encourage the kids to actually try to swim independently.

He might just be shit, I was. My poor mother dutifully took me to lessons every week for years but I only learned to swim aged 15 in order to go on a PGL holiday with my mate. She boot camped me. Even then the only stroke I could and can do is a geriatric, glacial breaststroke with my head out of the water.

In your shoes I’d probably try a 1:1 lesson with someone who comes highly recommended. Well done for persisting. Luckily my Dd wasn’t as dire as me but she’s not great either. My peers all seemed to learn in the same class so I don’t think it was the tuition. I was a very cautious child and not sporty at all.

DS has always loved water and being in it. At baby swimming he would deliberately spend more time under it that with his head above water. He has no fear of it.

He started swimming age 5. But he's shit at it. As in really shit. He's still only stage 3 and in classes with kids four years younger than him.

But he is starting to improve now and he's just about doing 25m unaided.

I have come to accept that he will not be going to the Olympics to do the 200m freestyle but I will be satisfied with him cracking 50m and being confident in water if still shit at technique!

He's good at other things. Just not swimming!

Sorry but this is bad advice, young learners absolutely need someone who knows what they're doing in the water with them to get good progress (and safety). Poolside teaching too early can result in kids learning with bad body positions etc that then get entrenched. You do need somewhere where you trust the teachers to do what they know best though, and I appreciate there are some terrible ones out there. As with anything!

Mine both learnt after a summer of swimming everyday for a couple of weeks. I don't think they really learn anything in those lessons.

I think it depends on the child.
DD started at the same time as her best friend back in June, she’s now in stage 5 (can swim independently) and her best friends still in stage 1 refusing to put her face in the water which is needed to move up to stage 2. They had the same teacher/class.

We followed the toddler sessions into Foundation at 4 and at 10 & 13 they're now in stage 7. (DS1 is dyspraxic, so DS2 tends to close the age gap up at sport). They lost a year of progress with Covid at about stage 4/2 as although they were cleared to move up, the swim school stalled class changes due to general losses of fitness/ technique.

Really it's often about 6-8 when the bodily awareness and strength goes up a gear and actually learning to swim becomes more productive. I don't regret the 8 years of lessons though because that's been consistency of access to a pool (provision to public sessions is very poor) and for DS1 in particular it's been good for his co-ordination. It's just been a weekly habit since the baby years and they've enjoyed it. They are now decent swimmers and I'm happy that they have a secure foundation to improve their stamina as they mature or be able to do any water-based sport they fancy.

Thank you. This is the school he attends.

How big are the classes? I've seen some classes with 8 kids for 1 hour, but that still works out to less than 8 mins per kid. If you can I'd go for 1:1 lessons for faster results.

Dc is 4.5 and in a group stage 3 class (4/5 kids). DC can swim 25m back stroke without floats and 10m front crawl without floats.

My 2.5 yo has been going since about 8 months old, initially 20min weekly, now 30min weekly most weeks and can pretty much swim independently now. Class size is a maximum of 8. I find the teacher is key as initially we had a useless one, this one is great and we've stuck with her

Thank you all so much! You've given me a lot to think about.

I would advise anyone against lessons with the teacher in the water. They’re too hands on and don’t encourage the kids to actually try to swim independently.

That hasn't been our experience. They very quickly went from holding to letting go and allowing independent floating/swimming. It seemed to be primarily about giving confidence that yes, you will float but once they have that, they don't need holding anymore.

Yet it’s a reasonably recent thing and we’ve had generations of good swimmers prior…