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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask what being post-menopausal feels like

17 replies

ThePriceOfSugar · 14/01/2024 22:23

I'm 26 and interested to know. From 17-25 I took the pill continuously, and it's only recently that I have started to notice and understand my endogenous hormones. For example, in my follicular phase I have way more strength and endurance in the gym; during ovulation I have the horniness of a teenager etc.

On the pill I felt flat and the same every day (with zero libido). Is that how being post-menopause feels? I've heard some quite positive testimonials to the contrary but there's no popular knowledge on this.

OP posts:
onanudistbeach · 14/01/2024 22:38

Well done you for being in tune with your body and recognising the changes in you . I'm 46, so peri-menopausal. Had the Hpv virus last year and after that decided no more contraception, no more hormones. I would like to actually understand where I am in the whole cycle. Feel gutted I didn't do it sooner as I feel so much better and libido higher than ever ! Feel like I've missed out years tbh . As women we are responsible for contraception and taking tablets or coils . For 30 years.

BeaRF75 · 14/01/2024 22:42

Like being post-menopausal, but you don't have to faff around with periods. And you're more tired - coz you're older - but care less.
Honestly, don't stress about it - far more interesting things in life to think about.

Errols · 14/01/2024 22:43

A relief.

LBFseBrom · 14/01/2024 22:45

BeaRF75 · 14/01/2024 22:42

Like being post-menopausal, but you don't have to faff around with periods. And you're more tired - coz you're older - but care less.
Honestly, don't stress about it - far more interesting things in life to think about.

Yes. It never bothered me and I think I emerged stronger after the menopause, however, not much different to before. It sure is great not to have periods any more.

Bristoluser · 14/01/2024 22:46

I'm post menopausal (57) and I experienced a surge in libido from about 45 to 50, but my periods stopped at 50 and I then experienced a big decline in libido. I am beginning to regain it again and I think it’s still higher than when I was young, partly I think because I care less about my looks and also because I feel 100% with my husband.

I am more achey and have arthritis post menopause but that might be age rather than menopause. I'm on HRT which helped with some things but not others.

Generally, I'm more tired but happier in many ways too.

recklessgran · 14/01/2024 22:48

It's great don't worry! You can have sex whenever you like and no periods or potential pregnancy to worry about. Yes, it is harder to stay slim so you have to be more mindful of diet and exercise but you generally don't give a shit what people think of you. You have more energy, need less sleep and don't get PMT just generally feel the same all the time - well that's my experience anyway.

Bristoluser · 14/01/2024 22:49

I genuinely care less about what people think, I enjoy relaxing more. I am happy with my figure (even though I'm fatter!)...

I'm very glad not to have periods or worry about contraception...

KnickerlessParsons · 14/01/2024 22:51

I've been post menopause for about 15 years. No periods is great, and I don't feel any different otherwise.

JusticeIsAFickleWench · 14/01/2024 22:51

Surgical menopause, HRT.
The sudden appearance of jowls and wrinkles almost overnight has been hugely shocking BUT the lack of strength I now have is very concerning.
I have always been hands on lugging stuff about, digging stuff, decorating etc etc but I now feel so feeble!
Even trimming the hedge last year was such an undertaking that, later on in the year when next door had a man do theirs, I got him to run over mine too.
I’d never normally consider paying someone to do my gardening. I’m only 50!
I do yoga and run and have well defined muscles but now I have no strength.

ThePriceOfSugar · 14/01/2024 23:19

The feeling of being carefree comes up so much when I read women's stories about this. It's good to hear. I've always gotten off very lightly with periods but if you haven't I imagine the relief is immense.

OP posts:
Bluestaratsea · 14/01/2024 23:24

It's great. Sex with no contraception worries, no periods to have to faff with. Very happy.

ChristmasinBurrRidge · 14/01/2024 23:30

No different to pre-menopause. I feel fit, strong and healthy.

PickAChew · 14/01/2024 23:41

I Permanently have the achiness I had with PMT.
My longstanding food intolerances have invited all their mates round.
Migraines. Had my first one at 40. See also food intolerances.
Libido gone walkabout.

On the plus side, I no longer GAF and will speak my mind without hesitation and I'm no longer at war with my weight. See also food intolerances.

Bristoluser · 14/01/2024 23:47

I also feel no desire to pretend to like people I don't like, enjoy eating whatever I fancy and am more relaxed.

TherealShuggie · 14/01/2024 23:48

I feel great . It's a kind of relief not to have periods anymore. I had PMT and heavy painful periods from 15. I am slimmer and fitter than I have ever been. The only downside in the menopause was a few months of heavy painful periods, unlike I had ever known before.

Libido is more but I think that is because I'm more happy with myself. Which is partly but not entirely linked linked to menopause.

I had a dreadful perimenopause anxiety. Never experienced anxiety before. But that was also related to where I was living then.

It's very difficult apart from physical symptoms to sort out what is linked to the menopause and what is linked to changes in life at that age. Late 40's early 50''s can be a time of upheaval in life. Possibly the menopause exacerbates difficult things at that age.

Everyone is different but I've never heard a woman of my age pining for periods. The transition mat be difficult. But after no.

VWT5 · 15/01/2024 00:32

I was surprised at shrinkage as part of ageing. External genitalia changed from always being fleshy - into the smooth appearance of a Sindy Doll (seemed amusing to me at the time). I wasn’t expecting the clitoris to shrink and even move position, the uterus also shrinks, I had no idea about that.

Orgasms became more elusive, shorter, and unrewarding.

All of the above has been totally resolved with HRT. (And oral B12 supplements for nerve function).

Like a poster above, I was always pushing men aside and it was me moving furniture and doing the heavy stuff - that’s fallen by the wayside, but the recent addition of Testosterone gel to HRT has improved muscle tone, muscle definition and upper body strength - notably now able to go back to using heavy garden machinery / hedge cutting again.

I started HRT quite late (mid 60’s) which has been interesting. I think my menopause was a very prolonged slow decline and fade, so slow infact that I barely noticed the changes. When I had to temporarily pause the more recent HRT for a short while, that was difficult. It felt as how I would imagine a sudden surgical menopause might be - within 48 hours - extreme anxiety, sleeplessness, unable to relax or settle, total loss of concentration, inability to think and function, sluggish, low mood, difficulty driving, body and muscle changes, loss of strength.

I'm saying that I didn’t properly notice the very slow tailing off of hormones and their effects at actual menopause itself, whereas the sudden stopping of HRT brought into sharp focus just how different I was, and recognition of just how much better I was doing with the addition of hormones.

Bristoluser · 15/01/2024 00:48

Really annoyingly I have developed a driving anxiety that I can't shake. I've been driving since I was 17 and am now a very hesitant and not very good driver.

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