to think my mother should mind her own business

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I dont think i am,.. but need someone to tell me!
Anyway, ive got dd, whos 2.2 years. Ive come off the pill in sept 07 and finally had my first af today, so i phoned her and let her know as she had been worried as id had blood tests etc.... but then she told me she was worried i would have another baby, and apparently we dont want any more babies at the momment. WTF? She even asked what contreception i was on now. I told her it was noone of her business.
Im narked about it now. Im almost 30, work, have a house, ( rented) so i dont understand what the problem is really.
DH and i did have a rocky patch ( we seperated for a few months ) 2 years ago. So maybe its something to do with that. I should also add that until just over a year ago she had not been in my life for about 11 years.
Its none of her business is it?

Unless you expect her to babysit all the time or expect a lot of help then NO none of her business at all!

YANBU none of her business unless she is expected to do as love says or is going to be finacially responsible for them.

If you take the trouble to phone her and tell her you have your period you're greenlighting a lot imo. If that's how close you are, maybe she thinks it's ok to say what she did. Ultimately she's concerned about you and has voiced that - if she's telling you what to do then YANBU but if she's only offering an opinion then, irritating though it is, she's not really unreasonable to do so.

no, she wont have to babysit a lot at all, nor be finacially responsible.

I didnt just phone her to tell her about my period, we did talk about other things too. She was just concerned as dh had let it slip i had gone for blood tests and she has been harassing me about it daily for weeks.

I am sure that she doesn't mean to interfere. She just thinks alot of you and probably worries loads. I expect we will all be on various forums telling each other "Oooo, my John has just met this woman and she says she doesn't want children..." in 20 years.

God Help Us

She sounds concerned but a bit too concerned

Practise being vague and saying MMmmm, yeah, it's all fine, nothing to report and change the subject.

yes, on principle

having read, yes definitely. My mum tried to give me some well-meaning advice on getting pg with DC2 the other day, I found stony silence on the end of the phone was quite effective...

Could she have meant that its not a good time for medical reasons, perhaps thinking that you need a gap between coming off the pill and getting pregnant, rather than a lifestyle choice?

YANBU my Mother is like this apparently everyone should wait until DC1 is 2 before ttc DC2 like she did, I took her advice DD1 was 9 months when I got pregnant with DD2 she said "I take it it was an accident" erm No none of your business.

When I got pregnant with no3 and thought I was having a mc she told me "maybe it's for the best as 3 DC would be expensive!" sadly I did miscarry. Apparently no one has large families anymore and everyone should have 2 DC only.

She also told everyone I was waiting a year to ttc again to rest my body, erm was pregnant 2 months after mc.

Now she has told me to have no more, I told her we plan on having 6 (we don't) but it's none of her business, she doesn't babysit and sees the DC about 4 times a year.

Mothers hey..... im sure we will never be like that .

Cant be because of how she did things, there is a 2 1/2 year age gap between all my siblings, so with my dd being 2 and 2 months already....

Mothers hey..... im sure we will never be like that .

Cant be because of how she did things, there is a 2 1/2 year age gap between all my siblings, so with my dd being 2 and 2 months already....

PMSL - were we separated at birth?? My mother banged on for the full 9 (and a half ) months of my second pg about how the gap between ds1 and 2 (nearly 20m) was far too small, I was mad to be pg, I wouldn't be able to cope, I'd get PND, it was all just terrible.
When my older sister got pg, no comments, because there was a 2 year gap between hers.
Funnily enough the extra 4 months makes no practical difference whatsoever. dsis and I have both coped pretty much the same with the transition from 1 to 2. People just have this weirdy idea in their heads of what the "correct" age gap between children is, and sadly they don't mind telling you. Either ignore her, or challenge her and ask her exactly what she means, and see if she crumbles!