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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Drunk son!

46 replies

Bossyboo · 14/01/2024 00:01

Age old story nearly 18year old son been to a party tonight. Just come home very drunk - friend bought him home - bless him! He's apparently been quite sick and the last time it was water. He's apologising and swaying - the question is do I need to sleep in the same room as him to check him in the night? My husband thinks it's weird and he just needs to sleep it off but I am a bit worried as he has drunk a lot of spirits. I don't know what the correct thing to do in these circumstances tbh! Shock

OP posts:
ConciseQueen · 14/01/2024 00:03

Well I am a nervous mum about this stuff so I would sleep in with him - or at least put him on the sofa for a couple of hours. But, I think your DH is most likely to be right. This kind of risk depends on the amount drunk and it is difficult to know from the information you have given.

Aria2023 · 14/01/2024 00:03

Lay him in bed on his side. Pillows behind him (so he can't lay flat on his back). Bucket or similar by the bed and a big glass of water too and he'll be fine. He finding his drinking feet! He'll have a better idea of what his tolerance is tomorrow!

Original poster
Bossyboo · 14/01/2024 00:08

Thank you! They are such a worry aren't they - can't believe I used to think how much easier it would be to a parent when they're 'grown up ' 😂 He's currently in the bathroom so will probably stay near by when he gets in to bed for a while then try and get back to my lovely comfy bed! He sure will regret it in the morning I'm sure - meant to be up and out early too for an event!! Thank you 🙏

OP posts:
HappiestSleeping · 14/01/2024 00:17

If he was speaking, then he'll be fine. It's when they're totally unconscious that you have to worry (not sleeping unconscious).

Legendairy · 14/01/2024 00:19

Bossyboo · 14/01/2024 00:08

Thank you! They are such a worry aren't they - can't believe I used to think how much easier it would be to a parent when they're 'grown up ' 😂 He's currently in the bathroom so will probably stay near by when he gets in to bed for a while then try and get back to my lovely comfy bed! He sure will regret it in the morning I'm sure - meant to be up and out early too for an event!! Thank you 🙏

DS did this at about 15, they recover extremely quickly, he was up playing cricket the next day, no after effects at all!

KissMyArt · 14/01/2024 00:23

If he's up and about now in the bathroom, he'll be ok.

Just make sure he has a bucket next to the bed and plenty of water.

SouthEastCoast · 14/01/2024 00:24

Stay with him, make sure he sleeps in a safe position until he has sobered up . I have teens too

JellyBeanFactory · 14/01/2024 00:51

Oh and get the vacuum cleaner out, early, on the landing. My mother used to do this on a Sunday morning..

Noseybookworm · 14/01/2024 01:05

My eldest did exactly the same at 18! I put him on the sofa and slept on the lounge floor. Husband thought I was mad but I worried about him choking on vomit in his sleep. The things we do for our kids 😏 don't think I actually slept very much!

araiwa · 14/01/2024 03:23

JellyBeanFactory · 14/01/2024 00:51

Oh and get the vacuum cleaner out, early, on the landing. My mother used to do this on a Sunday morning..

Why would you deliberately and unnecessarily be a twat?

Spomsored · 14/01/2024 04:18

You shouldn't need to sleep with him but water and a bucket is a good idea. If he is sick let him clean up himself

Nicetoknowyou · 14/01/2024 04:25

I’ve slept on the floor outside my sons open bedroom door when he was 16 and very drunk as I was scared he might choke on vomit and also when he was older and had been spiked… very scary. Obviously I made him lie on his side with pillows behind him and had a bowl by his bed. He’ll hopefully have a lie in and wake up looking for a fry up!

Maray1967 · 14/01/2024 07:34

Mine did this at home on his 17th. His friends sheepishly got us from the back room to say how ill he was and admitted they’d been egging him on in drinking games - they were fine. DH took them home early while I dealt with DS who was sick everywhere in the downstairs loo. When back, DH got him into the shower, stripped him off, showered him down and got him into bed while I cleaned up. I sat in his room for a couple of hours next to the bowl.

Put old towels down over the carpet with the bowl on, and have water and tissues handy. If he’s ok for a couple of hours he should be fine then.

Have a good talk when he’s able to engage …

Maray1967 · 14/01/2024 07:36

And that was the only time he’s ever done it - at home at least. I can’t speak for when he’s was at uni. He’s 23 now.

DS2 (15) shows no interest at all in alcohol so I’m hoping for no repeat occurrence.

mumonthehill · 14/01/2024 07:56

Ds at that age threw up out of his window, he was very sheepish the next day when I made him get the hose out to clear it up!! He will be fine, but it is stressful!

familyissues12345 · 14/01/2024 08:58

The first time my son got very very drunk he'd been out with friends and had already planned one of them to stay over afterwards (due to his distance from home)

The friend sat up with DS all night (he wanted to!), I think it taught both of them a bit of a lesson Grin

Legendairy · 14/01/2024 09:18

JellyBeanFactory · 14/01/2024 00:51

Oh and get the vacuum cleaner out, early, on the landing. My mother used to do this on a Sunday morning..

Wow nice, just let him sleep it off surely

notacooldad · 14/01/2024 09:21

Oh and get the vacuum cleaner out, early, on the landing. My mother used to do that
Please dont. You wouldn't like it done to you.
Hopefully now it's morning and hes had a good sleep he will be fine.

Hhhh80 · 14/01/2024 09:29

I think Jellybeanfactory was being tongue in cheek!! I thought it was funny.

Hope he's OK today OP. On a side note to this, does anyone else find that teens drink a lot less and have a lot less interest than we did at their age? I'm mid 40s for context.

Our 16yr old has no interest. He had a small bailey's at Christmas and said that was enough. I think it was more the nice taste of it he liked.

Mumof2NDers · 14/01/2024 09:32

araiwa · 14/01/2024 03:23

Why would you deliberately and unnecessarily be a twat?

Show quote history

My mum used to do this too.!!
She would hoover my room while I lay hungover in bed. If that didn’t work she’d climb over the bed and open the curtains 😂.
She hated laziness and if she was up she expected everyone to be up. Annoying at the time but I can laugh about it now

Divebar2021 · 14/01/2024 09:36

Well my DH came home from his retirement party this week like this. I heard him crashing through the door at 01.30 then sounds of him throwing up. Thankfully he took himself to the sofa and I supplied the blanket, bucket and water. I have to say the colour of his face led me to believe his morning was not going to be pleasant and I was not wrong.

Mumof2NDers · 14/01/2024 09:36

Hhhh80 · 14/01/2024 09:29

I think Jellybeanfactory was being tongue in cheek!! I thought it was funny.

Hope he's OK today OP. On a side note to this, does anyone else find that teens drink a lot less and have a lot less interest than we did at their age? I'm mid 40s for context.

Our 16yr old has no interest. He had a small bailey's at Christmas and said that was enough. I think it was more the nice taste of it he liked.

Definitely! I was shocking in my teens and early twenties. If I didn’t get absolutely hammered I hadn’t had a good night. My 23 year old DS can take it or leave it and my 16 year old doesn’t like it! Although I think getting extremely drunk when he was 14, sneaking out of the house and throwing up in town in front of lots of people may have something to do with it.

Isthisblocked · 14/01/2024 09:42

I think it is a useful lesson to learn how to handle alcohol while you are still at home with parents to care for you…. once at university the alcohol is available but without the backstop of a responsible adult at home. . we had a few (not too bad) incidents with DS between 16 and 18 as he learned his tolerance and ability to handle alcohol, but by the time he went to university we were fairly confident he would be safe with the “drinking games” and other such pitfalls.

Marblessolveeverything · 14/01/2024 09:44

JellyBeanFactory · 14/01/2024 00:51

Oh and get the vacuum cleaner out, early, on the landing. My mother used to do this on a Sunday morning..

@JellyBeanFactory you have caused me quite a flashback!😜 My mother would be in windows opened vacuum on at 7, Daniel O Donnell blaring .

It taught me a valuable lesson, don't think I ever touched vodka again or cake home in such a state .

Marblessolveeverything · 14/01/2024 09:46

*came not cake!