To like Saturday School for Prep School Children?

[FormerLondoner]

As a full time working mum, the last thing I need is to be driving to multiple out of school activities on Saturdays. So with Saturday school the school plans all sports fixtures etc or I do is drop off and pick up or watch if it’s local. Hubby thinks the DC should join local clubs on Saturday’s such as Scouts (Been waiting for 2 years for a slot to come up) rugby, etc. The only thing is DC finish school at 5pm in the week and the children who attend the Saturday stuff in our area finish school at 3.30 so they attend said activities at least one evening in the week as well as the weekend.I don’t want to tire my poor darlings out by adding evening activities after such a long day at school. AIBU to outsource Saturday mornings to the school?

You’re the one who thinks it’s good for everyone to be busy.

It’s also good to learn how to be happy in your own company and self-reliant. A different parent might prioritise that more.

I suggest you start with what each of your children actually enjoys and works backwards from there. It’s a right mission forcing them to do stuff they don’t want to do. Letting them do stuff they want to do is lovely.

I would not make Saturday school the deciding factor when choosing a school. I would think long and hard about whether it would suit my child.

If constant lifts would run you ragged and make your life unpleasant then that is, of course, also relevant factor. Your desire for them to be busy does not trump your own well-being.

As children get older they become more independent and can make their own way to more stuff. They also change their mind about what they enjoy and they also drop stuff. I’m not sure how old your children are. Are we talking junior or senior school?

You say you want them to be busy but you also don’t want to tire them out. Whichever school they go to, surely you can just strike the right balance between these two? Drop anything that is not enhancing their life.

I assume they’re sporty, because for a non- sporty child those Saturday afternoon matches are an enormous drag.

When you both work FT then I think activities at the weekend are pretty typical - ours do drama on Saturday and swimming on Sunday. It doesn't take all day though and we get plenty of time together.

I think mixing with other children outside school is good, especially if school isn't very mixed demographically.

I also note that you need downtime (so great if the kids are at school so you can sort the house and have a break) but not that your kids need downtime and may not want hours of activities at the weekend.

Thank you for all your thoughtful comments. Yes the kids are very Sporty. currently so take the youngest swimming on saturdays and the older teen to Rugby on Sundays on top of working very very full/time. Yes I have a lovely supportive husband. We are town between two schools one with Saturday school 5 minutes from our house and the other without but it’s 25 minutes from our house. Both seem like nice schools.

Dd moved to a school that does Saturdays (just am). Before she started I hated the idea, but it’s only a slightly longer morning out than when we used to take her to football matches or training, unless there is a sports match in the afternoon (she’s on all the teams but she could choose not to be). Before finding football dd did dance on a Saturday which took up nearly the entire day (her choice we absolutely hated it if I’m honest). The kids have a scheduled weekend off at least once per half term so they can catch up and dd really enjoys school. It’s really not that big a deal and not much different to a Saturday morning activity.

@FormerLondoner DD has started Yr 7 as day pupil at boarding school and is currently on her way home from Saturday morning school so I don't disagree with it however the preppies don't do Saturdays unless there is a match. I personally think it is too young to cope with 5 and half days of school.
However I do actually agree with the "keep them busy" mentality. She will get home 12.50 then quick lunch and off to riding followed by pony club 😆.

@SchoolQuestionnaire Agreed it’s really is not that bad it gives one an opportunity to do something without the kids. super market shop or coffee with a friend. Then still have the afternoon together

My dc is in Private school and if he finishes around 5pm it's because of clubs. There's not a single club that he would like to do that isn't offered in school. So we do all the clubs he wants to do during the week. There's lots of parents who have their kids do weekend clubs and that's fine but in our home we do not do that. 2/7 days is all we have as family time so we spend that doing family stuff. That is much more beneficial to them than doing extra clubs. I also don't know why people push the need to 'meet kids from local area' so badly on here? All dc friends are from school anyway who they have actual relationships with, so why do they need to go make friends out of school just because? The only thing we accommodate for during the weekends is school parties/play dates. Op your dc need downtime, family time and time to be bored too. I know a child in dc class that does 7 clubs (y3). He is permanently tired, always telling anyone whose anyone that he is tired and yet his parents boast about how well-rounded he is because he does all these extra activities!

@twistyizzy you are definitely on my wave length. People can be judgy sometimes when some of them have Youtube raising their kids on the weekend in the name of downtime. 👍🏾

I've always told her she only earns screen time through fresh air and exercise. So if she didn't ride on a Saturday afternoon she would have to do some form of exercise before she could slob for the evening.
Even Sundays which are her chill days she has to walk the dog with us or help me out at the yard.

Perhaps I'm missing something but I don't see the difference between getting up early and dropping your kid to school and getting up early and dropping them to an activity. Especially if you also end up staying and watching some times

We moved ds out of a school that has Saturday school. He’s still at an independent but it’s a day school so need to “entertain” boarders at a weekend.
Ds does a couple of the after school clubs until 5:15. Weekends he’s in a football club which is outside of his school. I like him meeting kids from different schools/backgrounds. He’s the only private school kid in his footie club- and it makes no difference to any of the kids.

I can see the benefit with the after school stuff though. That was the bit I used to find painful. Finish work and school and then back out most evenings.

I’m speaking here as an adult who was sent to school on Saturday, 9-5 school every weekday, with extra evening things at the school, occasional boarding and all the extra activities that I could be shipped out to. My mother made it quite clear she would rather someone else did the hard work of raising me, no thoughts ever given to whether I’d rather do stuff at home.

Im telling you not all kids want to be non stop busy. Time with you at home is just as important and valuable. Kids actually want to spend time with their parents doing stuff together.

Saying parents just let their kids watch YouTube is very judgmental.

I know

I live in a different world. DS is only 8 but would be upset not to spend time as a family at the weekend. Saturday school sounds awful!

Children need downtime too

Who says they don't have family time at all at the weekend? We do and DD does Saturday mornings as a Yr 7. Saturday evening is snuggle on sofa + movie/popcorn night. Sunday is family dog walk and baking.
They have much longer holidays too ie 4 weeks Easter, 9 weeks summer so lots of opportunities for downtime.

DCs are at a London prep with no Saturday school (I think we must have looked at the wrong type because none of the preps we viewed had it). We enjoy our family time at weekends so we've scheduled extracurriculars on weekdays rather than weekends, to leave the weekends free for fun activities that change every week (trips to museums and galleries, NT properties and beach day trips in the summer, kids theatre and concert shows, birthday parties etc). We've never been one to do nothing on a day at weekends, even before dcs.

DCs do some extracurriculars at school but others outside of school. I wouldn't want to rely on school to provide all activities because the quality is just better/more serious for certain activities for some clubs which specialise in that activity. It's a pain to do the ferrying around and it's nice on the days when I just do a later pickup as the DCs are at an extracurricular activity on the school site. But they can progress better in a hobby sometimes in a bigger club with better facilities.

That comment is the most judgy on the thread!

@twistyizzy you put it very well. It’s a Saturday morning and it’s usually sport which we will go and watch most times. It gives time to do some jobs round the house and Garden then movie night on the Sofa in the evening. I agree with earning screen time. We have the same approach.

@leften , Yes I have noticed Saturday school is not very popular in London but we live outside of London and in our area most old and traditional prep school have it. Clifton college, Aldro, cheltenham college etc all still have it.The level of sports competitions is also quite high. Schools outside London seem to have a lot more outside space as well. Different environments I guess.

@ColleenDonaghy I did not say all parents let Youtube and games raise their kids, but they are a lot who do. In which case I would rather my kids are out being active during the day. My husband and I keep active as well and it’s great for all of us.

My DC do a couple of clubs after school and one sports activity out of school. On top of that, they have daily homework to complete and reading. That's a lot in my view.

Weekends are for them to wake up when they want, watch their favourite shows, relax and have fun together, as a family. They often go swimming on a weekend, or we simply decide what we feel like doing on the day and go out and do it.

Right now, one is cuddling up to me on the sofa and my other child is laying on her bed, playing with her dolls. This, to me, is heaven. I want my children with us on a weekend. They go to parties but apart from that, weekends are our sanctuary.

I don't give my DC much screen time, but even those who do aren't letting YouTube and games raise their kids - any more than you're letting school and sports coaches raise yours.

@doublexegg And what gives you that idea

I would choose sports over Youtube anyday. But no access is ideal it’s about balance which I think we are all trying.

What gives me that idea?
I got the thought when reading your post.