To expect an appointment with all my child's teachers?

[ACTIVE123]

My only child has started High School for the first time this academic year.

Appointments have been made available for parent consultation evening (5 min zoom appointment per teacher) but despite looking at all slots, I can only get appointments with 4 out of 12 teachers.

I logged onto book only 2 hours after the email was sent saying appintments were made available.

I contacted the school and was told I'm on a waiting list as there are simply too many children to get an appointment with every teacher.

Am I being unreasonable to expect an apppointment with every teacher? Is this how it works at High School? Asking genuinely as I'm new to this and not sure if it's just me?

The school is an ofsted outstanding and is highly oversubscribed.

At our school we do struggle to have enough slots for every parent to see every subject’s teacher, particularly at KS3 as many teachers will teach more than one class (possibly 90+ students in a year group). BUT what we do is allow parents to book a limited number first off (I think it’s 6…?) so everyone can get some appointments and then they reopen the bookings again and it’s a ‘free-for-all’ on whatever’s left. I think this is a reasonable compromise and if you’ve only been able to get 4, especially when you’re booking very promptly, I really don’t think that’s reasonable. They need to review their system and I think you are not unreasonable to expect to see more than 4 teachers and you would not be unreasonable to suggest that they need to review their system.

Do your high school have one massive parents evening or is it different days for different years?

If its the first, I can totally understand why they are booked up. Mine have different years/days and never struggled to get an appointment with all teachers.

Year 7 is the worst as everyone is keen. It does get better, but you do need to set an alarm and log on as soon as it opens.

While I agree with you. My son was one of those kids and is currently at uni. By the end of his time at school I found that the teachers had less and less to say to us and we would struggle to fill the time in appointments (and my husband is a teacher so had teacher questions to ask). There’s only so many times you can hear “yes he’s doing well, he’s hitting his targets, he’s predicted x grade, no there’s not really anything further you need to do” I can definitely see why appointments for others could be prioritised.

I am a teacher and they absolutely can. I’ve never met any parent outwith set parents night appointments. Not sure why you are so confidently wrong on this topic. We have a working time agreement and we do not need to go over the allocated time for appointments.

Sadly, teachers cannot see all parents in one evening - eg. if they teach 8 subject groups 2-3x a week, with 30 students in each class, this is 240 students. At 5 mins each that is 20 hours of parent/teacher time.

I tend to prioritise the subjects that look to be an issue, and most important subjects (prob Maths/English/tutor/‘science’ if combined in year 7) based on school reports grades & comments, and/or email the subject teachers directly if I have concerns.

Teacher here - this is common at most schools. At my previous school I taught 3 y7 groups (~90 kids) and had a y7 form. This was about 120 kids and an evening with 36 appointments on the evening there was no way I’d be able to see every child. My current school split the year group across two evenings but even this only creates 72 appointments across the two days (and that’s without allowing myself even a 5 minute break).

I’m im not speaking for all teachers here but I’m always more than happy to reply to emails queries/arrange phonecalls with parents who couldn’t get appointments but want an update on progress so I’d suggest emailing the teachers you aren’t able to see and asking if they can drop you a line summarising how your dc has settled, what their attitude is like and if they have any concerns.

I mean, YANBU to expect to get feedback from all teachers - but aside from it being online, it was exactly the same when I was in secondary, and that was nearly 30 years ago.

My advice would be to speak to those teachers you might have concerns about their subject, or just maths, science and English.

As the parent of one of these ‘gifted’ children I can say from experience that we don’t want to hear ‘well done keep it up’ and wall to wall compliments. We want to know what else we can do to support our child. Maybe thise things aren’t academic; we want to hear how she interacts, where her confidence falters, how she is in herself at school. Teachers observe so much more than academic achievement and I want to hear from them what else I can do to support my daughter growing into a successful annd well rounded adult.

Chances are parents are already well aware of their kid being the class clown.

I also need opportunity to speak to the teacher myself. Address concerns my daughter might have raised with me etc.

If you were a top performer at work would you be happy if your boss said “I can’t do a 121 for you, you don’t need it anyway, I’m going to give my attention to everyone else instead”?

Absolutely agree. DD is very very bright but has ADHD and can be distracted or struggle to engage with others. That’s what I want to know about.

I complained about one teacher last year saying that DD would “always finish her work early”. I asked what would happen and they said “we get her to teach the others”. They should be stretching her if the (non-set)work is too easy for her!

If each teacher has so many children they are teaching they can't fit in a 5 min slot with every parent, I'd be a bit concerned about whether they even know my child at all.

Because seeing every parent in one evening is definitely the same as seeing the children across a fortnight.

Most secondary schools have a parents evening for each year group, and appointments are usually either 5 minutes. They usually last at least 3 hrs with maybe a 25 min break in the middle. That's 30 appointments, i.e. at least a whole class (and 30 is too many for a good learning environment imo but that's another story.) If that applies across 5 year groups, then the teacher has 150 children to teach. There is NO WAY that you can have an adequate knowledge of 150 children, including their progress and personality, what motivates them, the areas they need more help in; you just can't memorise that much data. The only children that are going to get any meaningful feedback are the very top achievers, the ones who are really struggling, and the ones who are very disruptive.

If each teacher has so many children they are teaching they can't fit in a 5 min slot with every parent, I'd be a bit concerned about whether they even know my child at all.

A full-time teacher, especially one who teaches a non-core subject (so has fewer lessons per class per week) is always going to teach a hell of a lot of kids, unless they teach in a private school with tiny classes. I teach 11 classes, all of which have 27-31 kids, except my one 6th form class. There are only 7 year groups, and I won't necessarily teach every year group, so obviously I'm going to have multiple classes in several year groups. This is totally normal and totally unavoidable. I get to know the students as well as I can. I certainly don't know all my 90 Y7 students by Christmas though. I only see them once a week.

Lockdown 1 was in the latter part of year 7 for dd so there was no parent’s evening that year. In year 8 it was just before the summer break. I did manage to book with most teachers and tbh it was really useful to speak to them all because it gave me a flavour of what dd was like in class.

It is all very well teachers saying parents evening isn’t that useful or that they will just hear that their girls should participate more and maybe forgot to do one piece of homework etc. This was perhaps true of the feedback I got for my dd. But what I actually heard was a girl, who was struggling to participate in class in any capacity, refused to ask or answer questions to such an extent that one of the teachers said she was struggling to give dd a grade. Dd basically refused to show any aptitude at all and lockdown home study saved her education as she worked better at home than in school. The feedback was the same in every subject, including PE. Dd is very sporty and a dancer but the teacher had no idea and put her in the bottom PE set for year 9.

In everything the teachers were saying, I didn’t recognise my child. Dd is a bubbly personality, used to participate in class in primary and is very sporty. I talked to dd about what was going on, asked her if she was happy and a couple of weeks before the start of year 9 she asked to change schools. She’s doing completely different subjects from the ones she would have chosen at her former school, including GCSE PE.

Edit - to add, this isn’t a criticism of teachers btw. I get you can’t see every parent. But to say sometimes telling people the same thing over and over again can be very useful.

I'm confused to hear teachers saying appointments are pretty pointless (whilst saying they attended their own children's). Points to the fact they aren't totally pointless. (Not to mention the fact that if there truly is nothing useful to say then there must be a lot of children working at a very high level).

Like parents who aren't teachers, I have attended my dc's parents' evenings because a) it looks bad if you don't and b) there's always a chance you might find out something useful.

(Not to mention the fact that if there truly is nothing useful to say then there must be a lot of children working at a very high level).

Many (not all, obviously) teachers probably have bright, capable kids. Also, being a teacher makes it easier to navigate your own child's educational path, to understand how your child is doing and to help them do well, especially if they are already able.

support for those challenging parents who might become agressive.

Every teacher has the right to disconnect or walk away from any aggressive parent, it's enough having to see their off-spring every day, the apple rarely falls far from the tree.

I asked what would happen and they said “we get her to teach the others”. They should be stretching her if the (non-set)work is too easy for her!

I can understand why you said this but sometimes working with someone whose ability/age is lower can be very helpful in gaining greater understanding oddly enough! An able person tends to become a bit complacent, I taught Maths to A level but once for a few weeks I did supply in a Primary school and it was a real eye-opener. For example, I'd always been able to do the 4 operations, (+ - x /) with confidence and no thought, it was only when I had to teach that the mechanics of what I was doing dawned!

I teach the whole of Year 7, approx 150 pupils (5 x classes). Appointments are 5 mins long. Parents Evening is 5 - 8pm. So if I don't have any breaks I can fit in 36 appointments. Honestly if you don't have any specific questions or concerns for a particular teacher then you don't necessarily need to see them. If there's a problem then the school should've contacted you or you can email at any time rather than wait until parents evening. At secondary school no news is good news!

No issues with the understanding. She has to translate her homework to us as she is educated in Welsh. Husband and I have 3 maths A levels between us, plus sciences and degrees so we aren’t unaware of the subjects. Her grandparents were school and university educators so teaching methods aren’t unknown, and I work in HR and gave quals in training and learning too.

She shouldn’t be spending half of every science lesson teaching children less capable than herself. There is plenty of scope to give her some stretching work.

(Interactions with others are often harder for girls with ADHD. It’s exhausting her for no good reason as well, which has other impacts on her days.)

Duplicate

150 kids

Hahahahaha

I wish.

30 kids in a class?

Hahahahaha

I wish.

Actually, teaching others is a way to facilitate higher order thinking skills; and a productive strategy to stretch more able pupils.

Not every lesson though.

Most secondary schools have a parents evening for each year group, and appointments are usually either 5 minutes. They usually last at least 3 hrs with maybe a 25 min break in the middle. That's 30 appointments, i.e. at least a whole class (and 30 is too many for a good learning environment imo but that's another story.) If that applies across 5 year groups, then the teacher has 150 children to teach.

150? Are you kidding? A full-time teacher does not only have 5 classes. Like I say, I have 11, which is pretty typical for a non-core subject teacher. I teach approximately 300 students. Some will teach more. We have 7 year groups including 6th form, so we have 7 parents' evenings.