I've name changed for this as asked a few people in RL too. Just looking for some advice.
Dd is 25 months (not saying that to be pedantic, just to be clear she's only just turned two and isn't nearing three yet!). Her behaviour worries me and want to know if this is normal and how we should deal with it.
There are a few issues:
- she is demanding, asks for something and will shout and cry until I give in and give her it. For example a biscuit right before dinner. If I refuse, which I've tried to do, she will scream and become so upset, refuse to eat dinner and takes forever to calm down. This could happen for a number of things and I know toddlers have tantrums but it feels like a neverending battle to get her on side sometimes.
- is very independent. Used to love being read to, now demands to hold the book and flicks through the pages quickly before tossing it on the floor. If I try to read it or even hold it she screams and cries and then will start another tantrum. Reading isn't enjoyable anymore.
- wants to do everything herself, even if she can't. Dressing, shoes on, cutting veg for dinner. Everything! Sometimes I let her help, other times I just can't for various reasons and again, results in a tantrum. Can barely get anything done as it's just not worth the upset sometimes.
- sleeping is still rough! She falls asleep in her cot , had the same bedtime routine since birth. She always wakes though and asks to come beside us. Cannot get her to settle back in the cot. She is asleep by 7pm but isn't waking until around 8.30am and that seems so late! She's recently stopped daytime napping which is helping her go down at night but is this why she's sleeping so late? Feels like I'm missing half the day by the time we get out. If we let her nap she won't go down for 7pm and therefore is down later and still gets up later in the morning. How do we fix this?
- she is big on routine, if we go out one day and get a sandwich in one place next time she'll remember this and cry until we repeat the same routine next time. If I give her a snack/biscuit as a treat in the car on a long journey she screams next time because she has wants it again every journey .
- she demands who does what. Eg I help at dinner time and she'll then say 'dad do it' and will refuse to eat until DP takes over. This happens at bath time, dressing, even just putting on shoes. If dp is changing her she'll scream until I take over. It's like she is just running rings round us sometimes. Is this normal two year old stuff?! If we do persevere, she'll kick and scream until she gets her own way and the other takes over then she'll immediately calm down.
aibu to worry?
In general she seems really switched on, already forming short sentences, able to sing various nursery rhymes and constantly asking 'whats that called', 'whats that noise ' etc. she's sociable and in general quite happy around other children. Just looking for some reassurance as a ftm and more importantly, how do we deal with this behaviour? Can we even reason with a toddler?!