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AIBU?

Partner frustrated by morning sickness?!

23 replies

mhn1 · 09/01/2024 17:27

Hi all,

currently in first trimester and genuinely struggling with morning sickness - have been signed off work for a week and have been prescribed anti nausea meds.
for the last two weeks I’ve hardly eaten and have absolutely no energy. The little energy I do have has gone into taking care of our toddler.
over the last couple of days my partner has vented frustrations that me not being well is “all we’ve spoken about”. He has tried to be supportive, however I mostly get “go back to the doctors then!”. I know he probably feels helpless but I’d appreciate a gentler approach! I know I’m hardly any fun to be around at the moment as even talking feels like effort, but am I going mad here to think he’s in the wrong?!

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?

144 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
1%
You are NOT being unreasonable
99%
Youcannotbeseriousreally · 09/01/2024 17:29

He sounds like an actual arse delightful

Didimum · 09/01/2024 17:49

What a horrible person he is.

I had HG for 25 weeks of my pregnancy. I wouldn’t have been able to forgive a partner being unkind to me during that.

CoffeeBeansGalore · 09/01/2024 17:50

Shame he can't take a turn in growing a tiny human, having every ounce of energy & goodness leeched out of him.

Hopefully he will contract the next d&v bug going around. You can tell him it doesn't matter that he's exhausted running back & forth to the toilet. That he is drained. He must get on with it or go to the Dr for a miracle tonic.

Unsympathetic git. (Can you tell I suffered with morning sickness? 🤣 - Although my DH was pretty good)

anqlsovbvb · 09/01/2024 17:51

Gross

CharmedCult · 09/01/2024 17:52

Doesn’t bode well if you need a c-section or are unwell in any way after the birth, does it?

Is he always such a twat when you’re ill?

whitebreadjamsandwich · 09/01/2024 17:53

Is he actually doing anything to help?

Notimeforaname · 09/01/2024 17:53

I'd be worried about that. How will he be after you give birth and need to recover.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 09/01/2024 17:53

CoffeeBeansGalore · 09/01/2024 17:50

Shame he can't take a turn in growing a tiny human, having every ounce of energy & goodness leeched out of him.

Hopefully he will contract the next d&v bug going around. You can tell him it doesn't matter that he's exhausted running back & forth to the toilet. That he is drained. He must get on with it or go to the Dr for a miracle tonic.

Unsympathetic git. (Can you tell I suffered with morning sickness? 🤣 - Although my DH was pretty good)

All of this! He sounds really horrible - is this a new personality he’s grown or is he generally unsympathetic and plain cruel?

My exh was quite similar - “go to hospital then!” I once remember him saying when I had a bad cold, and just needed to go to bed for a bit and rest, and let him take a turn at parenting small children.

I remember going to the doctors and being told to rest for one illness or another - and that there was no miracle cure I could take - and me being incredulous- “I’ve got small children, how can I rest?”. I don’t remember them pointing out that as I had a husband at the time I should have been able to.

Noseybookworm · 09/01/2024 18:30

He sounds horrible 😢 there really is nothing that the doctor can do, you just have to wait it out. I had morning (actually all bloody day) sickness with all 5 of mine and the only relief was when asleep. Sorry your husband is such a selfish and insensitive arse 🙁

Lizzieregina · 09/01/2024 18:38

Would you like me to come and kick him in the nuts for you?

What a useless excuse for a man.

FreeAdamsApples · 09/01/2024 18:45

What was he like during your last pregnancy? How is he usually if you're unwell? Is he helping with anything or just whining like a twat?

Sorry you're feeling so bad, I hope it eases soon Flowers

inquisitiveinga · 09/01/2024 18:46

What an arse hole! I've had HG for the majority of my pregnancy (currently 25 weeks now). My DS is 5 and my partner has NOT ONCE complained about my struggles, but has gone above and beyond to care for DS whilst also ensuring I'm OK.

I'd be genuinely worried if I were you - there's no excuse for refusing to acknowledge quite how amazing you are for growing a life and feeling so rotten simultaneously.

tokesqueen · 09/01/2024 18:50

He's having to parent his toddler is he?
Doesn't bode well.
Ae you married to this twerp?

colourfulchinadolls · 09/01/2024 18:56

Oh bless you. I've just finished my first trimester of my first pregnancy and whilst it's improved slightly I'm still vomming three times a day. Some people just have it very bad.

Your partner sounds very unsupportive. Its so difficult when you barely even have the energy to brush your hair. I feel for you and I hope it improves soon.

Busyhedgehog · 09/01/2024 18:58

Tell him to sort himself out and step up. Ridiculous.
I'm 12 weeks and have had a horrendous cold followed by sinusitis. Consequently, I've barely moved off the sofa in the past three weeks. DH is doing most of the housework, has done the Christmas dinner, is doing the washing and making me tea. I do what I can but I've been feeling absolutely dreadful for most of the holidays. Usually, I'd just take some medication and get on with life. However, most of what I would take isn't recommended during pregnancy so this is taking much longer than usual. (I'm sick of being sick.)
Your DH should be much more supportive and sympathetic.

Bananalanacake · 09/01/2024 18:59

Is he upset you can't cook and clean for him, or is he annoyed at having to look after his own child for a few hours.

Wellhellooooodear · 09/01/2024 19:00

What a guy! Seriously the man is an utter twat.

MamaToABeautifulBoy · 09/01/2024 19:01

Jesus. What a prince.

Jifmicroliquid · 09/01/2024 19:01

Perhaps remind him that you’re growing his child and putting your body through hell to do it!
Has he always been a selfish idiot??

EvilElsa · 09/01/2024 19:04

I'd hazard a guess that he's a right whiny shite when he's ill though?
What a dickhead. I'd be tempted to be sick over his feet next time he moans about your genuine medical issue caused by carrying his baby.
Totally ignore him and don't be pushed into doing anything you don't want to do just because he thinks you should be up and about and all glowing and happy.
I hope he stops being such a selfish cock and you don't have this to put up with forever.

Randomworkmoan · 09/01/2024 19:06

You are fooling yourself saying he feels "helpless", he just sounds like a dick

blushroses6 · 09/01/2024 19:25

I don’t think he feels helpless, he just sounds a bit unsympathetic. I’m currently pregnant, working 4 days a week, have severe sickness and a 14 month old. I have been a bit useless at home in terms of cooking, housework etc recently and my partner hasn’t complained once about me moaning or the fact he’s doing nearly everything at home when he gets in from work. I hope you start feeling better soon!

fuckmyuteruslining · 09/01/2024 20:20

Does he realise HG can be life threatening? He sounds like a total arsehole.

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