To move round the corner from my dad?

[JacketBeansCheese]

We’ve been keeping an eye on the market locally for months and a house has just come up that we’re really excited about. We’d been planning to view it tomorrow. Only problem is that it’s a quarter of a mile away from where my dad and his wife live (we currently live about 5 miles away). He’s said flat out that we have to drop the idea.

He’s not really saying why except that it’s ‘not healthy’ for parents and children to live too close to each other and that he wouldn’t want us to be looking into each others houses coming and going - but his is on a cul-de-sac and the one we’re looking at is not visible from the road!

We have three kids who he sees regularly and occasionally covers a childcare gap for us, but we’re both respectful of each other’s boundaries and he often says no to childcare if he’s busy (which we are do e with). So I don’t think it’s fear of having kids dumped on him.

Am I being weird for not thinking this is a big problem? Or is he being unreasonable for ruling out a really great house?

I dont see the problem. View the house and if you like it go for it quater of a mile isn't like next door or the same street.

I'd do what I needed to. If he mentions it again. Tell him you'll always ring before coming round and vice versa. You won't ask for more childcare than you already do etc

I think they're worried you'll be just popping in all the time

I think the sentence 'thanks for your thoughts' is appropriate here.

It's a free country. Move where you like.

I certainly wouldn't not buy a house for that reason, he's being a bit odd, does he have something to hide?

I think he's scared of becoming a very convient babysitter.

As long as you respect boundaries it should be OK. Half my family lived within a mile. And it never seemed to be an issue.

Weird. Quarter of a mile isn’t that close. If it was the house opposite or next door then l could kind of understand. Or even the same road then l could see why. It’s not his place to say you are dropping the idea

As someone whose mum has just moved less than a 5 minute drive away from me, I can see why he may be concerned.

It’s turning out to be a bit of a nightmare for me as my mum is constantly in my space now.

Reassure him that even if you do move nearer you will not encroach on him and that you will not be overstepping boundaries.

My guess is that he’s worried you’re going to be at his house all the time, asking to babysit all the time etc etc.

It depends on the personalities involved. We've lived 300 yards from my in laws for 20 years now. They don't pop round without checking, we do the same. There was no expectation of babysitting/errands/care. It can work well if you're careful with the groundwork.