A few years ago my husband started working at a bed company and was given some keys to the shop. We have a son together and I also work. after working there a few months, he came home one night after work to say that he needed to go in early tomorrow morning. He stayed up having a few drinks & said he might sleep downstairs.
Anyways, I went to bed around 10 having put my then 5 year old son to sleep around 7. My husband stayed downstairs and played some computer games. I fell asleep and woke up around 1ish and realised he wasn’t in bed with me. I went downstairs fully expecting him to still be playing on his computer as I needed a glass of water. Only when I got downstairs the lights were off and when I looked outside his car wasn’t there. I ran upstairs wondering if he’d gone into the office but no sign of him. I then realised that his car was gone. So I called him In a panic thinking maybe he’d gone out to get some petrol or something (bearing in mind he’d had some drinks) and I couldn’t get hold of him. I then got a text from him saying that he’d driven to the bed showroom as he couldn’t sleep. He sent me a picture of him on his computer. I had his iPad and did find my phone and it said that he was at the shop. He told me not to worry about him and he was alright and I should get some sleep. I couldn’t sleep for worrying and felt very anxious. The next day he text to say he was really sorry. I was fuming as he’d only just started his job and I thought he might get the sack if they found out.
to this day I have asked him why he did it &he said that he doesn’t know. My thinking was that he’d messed something up at work and went in to rectify it. We have officially separated and I’ve tried questioning him about it still and he says it’s in the past and he can’t change it. We’ve had trust issues in the past as I found some sex texts between him and his ex, when I was pregnant with our son. We also had a difficult year that year as I’d had a miscarriage and he’d accidentally run into a dog a few months before and didn’t stop to report to the police (but didn’t tell me until the police came knocking on the door). He said he hadn’t told me as it was a few weeks until our wedding. I thought maybe he was depressed or something.
he recently said that the reason we have split is because I’ve changed but he hasn’t. When I try and point out that he’s hurt me and there are trust issues, he gets angry.
AIBU for now separating as I’m worrying that maybe it’s the way I look at things. I really appreciate any to know why he disappeared that night but he doesn’t like talking about the past as it’s been and gone! He still maintains that he went into work and slept on one of the beds there.