To think Super Nanny Jo Frost has lost the plot?

[Pekoe78]

Assuming she sanctions the views on her social media page. Jo Frost has shared this bizarre scary post claiming that an unclean home is the “number one sign” of child abuse. How is she getting away with such inaccurate information? Surely she knows the difference between abuse and neglect and that actual abuse can happen in any home. If a child is actually suffering from real neglect, simply telling the parents “clean your house” is not going to help a complex situation. So what is she trying to achieve apart from making parents terrified of being accused of something because they are behind with cleaning?!

Just ridiculous. There are many kinds of child abuse. A dirty home can be a sign of mental health problems, complete overwhelm or just not caring. It can be associated with neglect, but actually the number one correlation will be poverty.

Meanwhile, sexual and emotional abuse can happen in any home, but is possibly more likely to go under the radar if the perpetuator is affluent, articulate and seems to have their life together. This post is unhelpful and misleading. But it isn't actually her post, so she may not have totally thought through what she was posting and it may not reflect her views.

Not at all- the most nasty paedophiles I have known lived in a spotless ‘mrs Hinch’ type home, had perfectly turned out children and one had a job where hygiene was extremely important.

Everyone saying 'she is not talking about' and 'she doesn't mean' - you realise this is the problem. It's as clear as mud. If it needs someone else to explain it, and can be taken multiple ways it's not the effective 'advice' she thinks it is.

A squalid house IS the abuse. Living in filth is neglect. If you clean up your house then you remove the abuse and provide your child with the adequate living conditions they should have. I don’t think she meant clean up your house to conceal abuse, she meant clean up your house to remove it.
Living in squalor and dirt is child abuse on an emotional, mental and physical level. I lived it and the shame and humiliation is immense, especially when you see other kid’s houses and realise not everyone lives in squalor. You don’t need to be an expert in any field or have kids of your own to know living in these conditions is child abuse.

I may be alone but I'm reading it as a counter to all these scummy mummy type social media people. Take heed of the warning that being a scummy mummy is dangerous and neglectful, and ultimately abusive, to your children.

Haven't seen JF's post but neglect IS abuse.

Yes that's how I read it too

The post is in the OP

She says it’s a sign.

Not that it absolutely means the child is being abused.

And she’s right. It is a sign. It’s a sign of problems at home. Whether it’s chaotic parents living chaotic lives, lack of ability to care practically or emotionally for children, a sign of depressed parents, a sign of parental conflict or dysfunctional parental relations where they cannot co-operate to clean the house, or a sign of parents under pressure and unable to cope. It is a sign something is going wrong. And that will affect the children.

And I say that as someone who has been there.

I agree with PP that the point of her message is to say, ‘this is not good for children’.

I think that fact that so many posters here have managed to say that living in a squalid house IS a form of neglect - in many clear and eloquent ways - just highlights how badly worded Frost's post is, tbh.

The posts here are the perfect counter point to show how it could/should have been worded to get the message across more clearly.

I think she's correct. If you let your child live in a dirty house then you're being neglectful, simple as.

It's not that there isn't a connection between filth/ squalor and neglect, it's that a social media post is not going to sort out the underlying issues which trigger the slide into those conditions.

I grew up in a cluttery-messy house, but it was clean. DM aways was ineffective about letting go of stuff and in the 20 years that she's lived alone, the hoard has crept out of control. She can't smell the pet messes in the corners after many decades of smoking, and the ancient furniture is worn out and not fit for use. It's a combination of the trauma of a WW2 childhood, and experiencing rationing until her teens with "waste not, want not" messaging, then being ill-prepared to cope with a consumerist society, plus physically being less able to cope as arthritis set in. No one can touch the hoard or deal with it on her behalf. Her situation is less complex than many but it's really not as simple as "clean up" and she would have to accept and work with psychological support and get practical help in to deal with it.

Meanwhile we're in a society where we're exposed to "perfect" minimalist, staged homes which to many are incompatible with the realities of family life. A message like this can be damaging to people who are doing nothing wrong, but feel like they're not meeting (false) expectations. People don't tend to share pictures of real homes looking lived-in to get a sense of perspective about that wide middle ground between perfect minimalism and harmful, squalid mess.

The phrasing of the message is not helping anyone, but it can be harmful to anxious families who are being good enough.

I used to like her but she got all shouty and cross when she moved to America and when she threw the chicken nugget I stopped listening to a word she said.

I'm from a dirty home. It was definitely neglect. And I was abused too

Dirty is dirty, she's probably right

This is a false comparison. paedophiles need to be friendly, likeable, normal presenting manipulators to access children. No one will let them near their kids otherwise.

Parents so unable to cope with basic essential daily functions that their house is filthy and they live in filth, are not in this camp.

I'm genuinely surprised that that post is controversial or it can be read as anything other than a statement that we know about the sign. But at least it got people thinking and talking.

Maybe the number 1 part can be controversial since I have no idea if it is the number 1 sign of neglect or in the top 5.

Whilst it's not the most severe kind of abuse, it's one that people will notice first, as its hard to hide filth. She's right though, keeping kids in a dirty home is neglectful and can create all kinds of health issues from short term stomach bugs to long term skin complaints and breathing issues. For people who are able bodied there is really no excuse to let your kids live in dirt - being too busy to keep your home disease-free means you need to reset your priorities.

It’s very easy to determine messy and squalid. You don’t have to gave a pristine Hinch house, most normal houses are messy especially with young kids.
If your child doesn’t have a clean bed to sleep in, laundered clothes, steps in dog or cat shit, has an unsanitary kitchen, has no space to do homework and us surrounded by dirt, filth and squalor… that is child abuse. End of.

Either way it's a poorly worded, factually dubious, pointless post.

isn't that true of most of the dross that celebs post though, @EarringsandLipstick? And as others have pointed out, that's what she is. A celeb with a brand, and a social media strategy to keep herself in the limelight, not a serious qualified professional.

Maybe her account got hacked by Mrs Hinch?

If she kept kids in this it would be abuse though. As a mum it's on her to access treatment for her mental health issue, not let everything fester because people are afraid to tackle her about it.

@BogRollBOGOF I would also suggest that's animal neglect / abuse no pet should be kept in conditions where they're not been cleaned up after

There are going to be exceptions but a really filthy house is a string sign parents have given up caring. There's so much performative hygiene on MN people have lost sight of the difference between a lived-in house that's just a bit grimy round the edges with some piles of laundry, and an actual hazardous environment with literally not a clean mug for a drink or a place to sit down. Perhaps a lot of us haven't experienced that (lucky) but you don't forget if you have.

Jo Frost decided not to have children of her own. https://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/supernanny-jo-frost-now-mega-31055910?int_source=amp_continue_reading&int_medium=amp&int_campaign=continue_reading_button#amp-readmore-target