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AIBU?

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Original poster

Is it even worth saving up for a house deposit?

40 replies

AngelSlicesMrKipling · 07/01/2024 21:20

Myself (26) and my partner (28) have just returned from travelling. No judgement please but we have pretty much no savings (he owned a house with an ex and she got the payout, I’ve rented my whole life).

We both have decent jobs, but if we rent, we wouldn’t save an awful lot.

We’re considering living with parents to save for a deposit. My partner is keen for this, as although it’s not ideal or private, he thinks it’ll be worth it for eventually having a place that’ll be ours.

I do agree, but also worry it’ll be a really difficult 18-24 months. I also feel it puts us backwards, if we just rented a lovely place we could start thinking about engagement/kids etc rather than putting everything on hold just to buy a bang average £250k flat.

Is it at all worth it?

OP posts:
Whistle67 · 07/01/2024 21:23

Definitely. You are still young and have time for children. It will be much nicer to have the security of your own home and much harder to save once you have to factor in either nursery fees or the loss of an income. Government policies will also lead to a lack of rental accommodation for the foreseeable future.

Dacadactyl · 07/01/2024 21:25

Yes it's worth it. Rent is money down the drain and in no way would i rent, unless it was the only way I could put a roof over my head.

However, I also wouldn't buy a house with someone I wasn't married to.

Dacadactyl · 07/01/2024 21:25

Nothing stopping you getting engaged and living with parents either

Doggymummar · 07/01/2024 21:28

I was reading an article earlier about FTB and apparently it's a 20pc deposit needed plus all the other costs so you will be looking at saving about 60k how long will that take you, then decide if it's worth it. When I bought my first place at 19 I had a 110pc mortgage to do some upgrades, it's so hard for youngsters these days

RaininSummer · 07/01/2024 21:29

Definitely worth it if your family are willing to offer that for you. Once you have children and rent you will really struggle to ever buy

forcedfun · 07/01/2024 21:30

Definitely worth moving in with family for a bit and saving for a deposit

ACynicalDad · 07/01/2024 21:33

Can you move anywhere cheaper? Having your own house gives you so much more security.

GreatGateauxsby · 07/01/2024 21:38

It’s hard but worth it.

He is right and you are lucky to have that option to enable you to generate a deposit so quickly.

I think it’s short term pain for long term gain and you are potentially guilty of short term thinking.
so you mess about in private rentals forever…
what does that look like when you have kids and they can’t decorate their room and you have to move every few years…?
what is your plan for retirement?
where will you live and how will you find it?

your monthly outgoings will be way lower in the future.
my 2 bed had a mortgage of £930 pm rental value was £1500
current house is £2500 rental value of £4k pm

Laiste · 07/01/2024 21:39

If you're only looking at 18 months to 2 years to save the deposit then do it.

Renting is paying someone else's mortgage for as long as THEY want. It's not your home - if they decide time's up you're out no matter how homely you make it.

2 years saving up is nothing compared to a lifetime lining someone else's pocket.

Twistyripple · 07/01/2024 21:44

Absolutely worth it. You'd be daft not to do it!

Sayingitstraight · 07/01/2024 21:47

Your still young, this is the best time to do it. Once children come along amd renting its much harder. Renting gives you zero stability

charliecoopershair · 07/01/2024 21:52

Dacadactyl · 07/01/2024 21:25

Yes it's worth it. Rent is money down the drain and in no way would i rent, unless it was the only way I could put a roof over my head.

However, I also wouldn't buy a house with someone I wasn't married to.

@Dacadactyl that's interesting, why wouldn't you buy without being married?

MotherOfRatios · 07/01/2024 21:54

Unless you live in an expensive area like London yes it's worth it

CatalogueOnVinylFlooring · 07/01/2024 21:55

It is always always worth it and, in fact, I wish I'd have been sensible enough to buy in my 20s. The longer you leave it, the longer you'll be paying a mortgage for. And do you still want to be renting in your 50s & 60s?!

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 07/01/2024 21:55

Short term pain for long term gain.

Of course it is worth it. The real question is will your folks want you to move back in?! 🤣

Laiste · 07/01/2024 21:55

he owned a house with an ex and she got the payout,

Also - just 'cos i'm nosey - how come it wasn't an equal split? He's got kids?

Moreorlessmentallystable · 07/01/2024 21:56

Just start with an ugly flat/house, put some graft in it and renovate it and move up. Sometimes you don't have to start in a nice place...

Dacadactyl · 07/01/2024 21:57

@charliecoopershair in my situation it was because I'd saved the bulk of the deposit and was a SAHM to our child. I wanted to continue being a SAHM (and he also wanted this) but I would've felt like id had to go back to work without the protection of marriage. And if he'd not married me, I'd have dumped him.

If we'd not had a child, I wouldn't have bought with anyone prior to marriage. And honestly, it's because I feel like if he doesn't think I'm good enough to marry, then I don't intend to contribute to putting a roof over his head.

Not a popular opinion, but that's what I think.

CatalogueOnVinylFlooring · 07/01/2024 21:58

Also, the money you can make on a property (yes, the market has to be buoyant) can facilitate better and better moves over time. We started out in a shared ownership flat which cost £95k and over 20 years have progressed to a £600k house.

Kwasi · 07/01/2024 21:59

Before you decide to do this, have either set of parents agreed for you both to move in with them for two years?

AlizeeEasy · 07/01/2024 22:00

Look into shared ownership, it’s a great way to get on the property ladder at a more affordable rate

Bryonny84 · 07/01/2024 22:00

If parents/family are willing to put you up then definitely live with them for a year. Save like mad, get extra jobs and within a year/18 months you might have enough. You're so young, you've got the rest of your life to marry, have kids etc. No problem with me buying property with someone I wasn't married to. Just make sure you have the details sorted out when you buy (and wills) as to a 50/50 split - or whatever suits if one pays more than the other. For me it was having somewhere to live when I was older (I am) and not having to pay rent or a mortgage. I wish you all the best.

Jumpingpogosticks · 07/01/2024 22:06

It's worth it. I haven't purchased anywhere, DH was always, oh after, after, after.
When we met, 3 bed houses were circa £179000, now, £380000 ish.
Fuck me, that's scary to read.
Rent was £550, is now (cheap for the area) at £1200.
We have children, and it's kind of scary to think that if my LL puts the house up for sale, the average house has 50 people apply for it according to various things I see about the rental market, people are often paying 6-12 months in advance.
Being evicted for no reason is a real possibility. It feels very unstable.

My advice- put everything off now until you have purchased somewhere so you can have some stability.
Worry about getting married and having babies after. Especially if it's only going to take 48 months like you think.

Bigcat25 · 07/01/2024 22:12

Yes it's worth it - it doesn't matter if it's average or not, it's yours. Short term sacrifice for the future. Even if you didn't end up using it towards a house, you'd have an emergency fund.

That said, if it would be torturous or too incompatible to live with his parents, then that's another matter.

EliflurtleAndTheInfiniteMadness · 07/01/2024 22:17

charliecoopershair · 07/01/2024 21:52

@Dacadactyl that's interesting, why wouldn't you buy without being married?

Show quote history

As long as they buy as joint tenants they will automatically get the others share if one dies. It matters if they have children then seperate, but otherwise I wouldn't think its an issue.
If they're not married and there are no defined shares in the house i think the usual assumption is a 50/50 split of equity So any SAHP won't be protected.

Unless its going to have a really detrimental effect on your MH OP I think its worth doing. Housing security is so important and while owning your own home doesn't mean something cant go wrong it does give you more options and more security than renting.