No time for personal grooming

[Artfuldodger24]

I don't know how some women do it but I just don't find the time for personal grooming. I see other women getting regular nails done, it seems a waste of money for me, although it looks nice and I would like to get pampered maybe? I have excessive body hair and find it difficult to do body waxing. I wax my face myself every 2 weeks but legs and underarms i get around to doing it only every 5 weeks.my husband doesn't complain but maybe it bothers some men?! i don't know. i don't put any moisturiser or makeup as i cant seem to find any time for it. i throw on mom clothes for school pickups / dropoffs and find any excuse to WFH. 9-4 i work full time. once kids come home i am dedicated to them till 9pm bedtime and then i log on and do work till 11 or 12 pm. sleep repeat. weekends are full just taking kids for extra classes. i don't have any time for personal grooming activities which take up money and time like skincare, waxing, nails and others. AIBU? it doesn't make me unhappy as i love spending time with my kids but i have had snide comments about my facial hair and mom clothes .

You said it yourself - you are not actually bothered about this stuff. If you really wanted to make time for it, you would. Skincare, for example, takes only takes about five minutes morning and night and you don’t have to spend a lot of money on it either. If you wanted to bother with it, you could. But you certainly don’t have to.

Basically, some other people have been rude to you, and now you’re feeling like you have to make excuses for not bothering much with your appearance. You don’t have to make excuses. Just tell them you’re perfectly happy as you are and suggest they learn some manners.

If it’s any consolation, I’ve had snide comments before from certain other women about the fact that I do spend time/money on personal grooming, so it’s no guarantee of approval anyway! I actually only spend a moderate amount on it, but I have still occasionally been sneered at for it by the sort of women who think you’re some kind of frivolous anti-feminist fool unless you cut your own hair with garden shears and wash your face with Swarfega or something.

If you wanted to you would. It's fine that you don't want to.

I just had a bath and used a face mask, and then moisturized and used my massage mat.

I'm a single mom and my ds has complex sn's.

When I can do things like this it feels good. I also love fashion so I dress well. I don't wear makeup all the time but I wear sunscreen and lipgloss with SPF.

Sometimes I get my nails done, I love pedicures.

The important thing is how you feel about it all.

I will often put on a face mask and make dinner. Or use whitening strips while cleaning the bathrooms. I think it's more habitual than making the time.

Gel nails take an hour and last five weeks, plus you don't have to think about managing them yourself. May be worth giving it a go once and seeing if you like them or not, if you think you might like the pampering aspect. If nothing else it might be nice to talk to some other women for an hour instead of rushing around after the kids?!

Clothes take the same amount of time to put on, whether they are shapeless joggers or smart casuals. Find a few things can pull on that are more fitted and you will automatically look more polished. M&S have some heavier jersey trousers which look smarter than joggers but feel the same. Similar with tops - a nice jumper or top can do wonders. Waxing - forget that and look at lasering if the hair bothers you. Make- up - you can get lash and brow tints, but I see a lot more people with no make up on these days and they look fine. Nails - short and shaped always looks classy. I keep nail files and nail strengthener in my car - it only takes a few minutes to dry so if I paint them in my drive, they are done when I get to the shops. I also keep tweezers in my car for stray hairs. Although you have to be careful where you do that!

As for moisturizer - c;mon now! It takes a minute. Keep it by your toothbrush and do it when you brush your teeth.

I'm the same, same with the body hair too. I don't have an answer to that, the facial waxing is getting me down. I dread it!
I don't get anything done beauty wise and have little time for it all, but I do use toner and moisturise every day. It only takes 30 seconds for toner and 30 seconds to moisturise. Just start with that, you'll feel much better and it's the only thing that will have any lasting benefit, looks wise.

Nobody should be commenting on your appearance op, that's just plain rude.
If you are happy as you ignore them but if you would like to be more groomed it doesn't have to take long.
Moisturising and a bit of mascara/lipstick take no time.
You could get your hair shaped into a low maintenance style that could still look nice daily.
Obviously you wear clothes, if you want to look better don't wear shapeless baggy clothes, wearing nice clothes takes exactly the same time to put on so that shouldn't be anymore time consuming.
Nails don't have to be gel polished to look nice, clean, short and shaped nails look nice and groomed.
But only do these things if you want to feel better about yourself, not to stop others commending about your appearance

If you are relatively pale and have dark hair, you can invest in a Philips Lumea- takes 20 minutes once every 2 weeks once it starts working and then once a month for upkeep. Best thing I ever bought - pricey but worth it.

I’ve got the time but not the inclination. I do moisturise and that only takes a few seconds. I don’t think I look terrible but I don’t look ‘groomed’ and I’m ok with that. No-one has ever commented negatively on my appearance. I think most people are just too busy getting on with their lives to comment on someone else’s facial hair/hairstyle/whatever.

People make time for what they want to, so if you were really inclined you'd find the time. Why are you 'dedicated' to your kids until 9pm though? Unless they're super young they can look after and entertain themselves for some of the evening, and weekends.

What matters is what you are happy with. Other people's opinions are irrelevant.

But if you want to do a little self pampering, you can do the absolute minimum very quickly. A daily moisturiser with SPF takes about 30 seconds and will protect your skin long term. Keep nail clippers in your bag so if you snag a nail, you can tidy it up immediately.
And maybe allocate an hour to yourself at the weekend, while your dh holds the fort, to do whatever is most important to you.

I'm a single mum and work full time. I limit it to moisturiser, a little eye make up and blow dry my hair daily (5 minutes), and a basic self manicure, pedicure, shaving legs & pits, and tidying up eyebrows at the weekend (30 minutes).

This ^ is what most people do.
It’s like anything else in life.
Put it in your diary or on the family wall chart “ME TIME” and use it like any other commitment.

Keep your body clean and odour free.
Keep your clothes clean and odour free.
Moisturise morning & evening.
Some of us use scented body moisturiser too.
Keep your nails trimmed and scrubbed.
Put on some lipstick before you leave the house.
Brush your hair.
It’s a start ! Job done!