Any advice for this dog before I genuinely hit rock bottom?

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I’ve got a nearly 2 year old cavapoo. She was quite a nervous pup which made training quite difficult as she was scared of the actual treat and wasn’t motivated by anything (from interactions I had with her breeder he was a horrible man hence why I took her from him in the end because I couldn’t leave her there).

The main problem with her now is she is so over excited over every small thing that it means she doesn’t listen to a thing I say and it’s really getting me down now. For example if we have a guest come over she will clamber and jump all over them. I’ve tried shutting her away behind a gate or in a different room until calm but she’ll just whine and whine and won’t stop until she’s let out. We did get to a good point where she was sitting and greeting calmly but my family ruined that by completely undoing the behaviour every single time they came over (we live near each other so see each other most days) because they don’t think she needs the training.

Every time I take her for a walk she’s just pulling the entire time and literally flinging herself in the air every time a dog walks by - it’s exhausting and I genuinely hate walking her because of it.

I just don’t know what to do without having to spend hundreds of pounds on a trainer but I’m thinking that’s the only resort left - and her ignoring me all the time and just doing what she wants is honestly getting me to the point where I dislike her and often think about rehoming her because it’s just disrupting the whole household - for example my DD is autistic and really struggles with the dog jumping all over the place and not being calm.

I’ve often tried to shut the dog away whenever family comes over because they clearly don’t respect any of the rules but then I just get met with judgemental comments of how unfair and horrible I’m being to the dog.

I’m seriously at the end of my tether with it all.

Hi OP - sounds really tough. Could you speak to her vet and get their advice? Maybe they'd recommend a local dog behaviourist.

We have a brilliant dog walker who takes her out twice a week for really long walks in a small group of other dogs. It's been really good for curbing her excitement at seeing other dogs.

Join a local class and persevere. To stop jumping up at guests, ask them to turn around and keep still and ignore dog every time.
Get a harness that stops dog from pulling.
Each day put dog in kitchen on own for 5, 10, 15 mins etc until it gets used to being on it's own.
Lots of things you can do and be consistent. Do try classes.

sounds to me like she needs a couple of very long and tiring walks a day. preferable with some off lead

so i’d pour my money and energy in to more off lead training

@SussexLass87 that’s the thing - she’s been going to a dog walker once a week since she was 6 months old and from what I can gather she’s brilliantly behaved for the dog walker and around the group of dogs she goes with but whenever it’s me and other dogs it’s a completely different story… the vet sounds like a good shout though I’ll ring them for a discussion because she also hasn’t been spayed yet because the vet recommended against it because her anxiety used to be so bad but now she’s a bit older and not as anxious it might be a good time and see whether that alters the behaviours at all

Her behaviour is so bad at times I’m genuinely embarrassed to take her to classes incase we get asked to leave… for the off lead training we also don’t have a lot of options for gated areas and I wouldn’t have the confidence to take her anywhere else incase she ran off and didn’t come back knowing what her attention span is like, I might ask the dog walker if she would mind maybe coming with me (if I paid her of course) because I think she’s done her fair bit of training before

You could try looking up Trust Technique. https://trust-technique.com/?gc_id=18950616134&h_ad_id=635575607233&gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQiAtOmsBhCnARIsAGPa5yb6Dx3I7dUCTrbe2Gjpg587QRAm7dTZQ8Rop84b8NEj-lJtHf3ejwQaAjrREALw_wcB
It's about building a relationship with your dog, once you have the relationship, the dog learns to listen. Works on people too!
There is a cost but they have been putting out specials lately.
It worked wonders with my neurotic rescue cat but I have heard good reports from dog owners and horse owners too.
Don't beat yourself up if you decide to rehome though.

How long are you walking her? My dog (similar size) was always a nightmare unless they had 2 hours of off lead time a day with lots of ball games.

Also if she doesn't go for food treats she might prefer a ball reward like they often use for sniffer dogs.

She needs you to teach her how to behave

you don’t have to spend hundreds on a trainer / behaviourist but you will need to learn how yourself from books or dog training advice and support on Facebook and you need to work at it and be consistent.

There’s no magic bullet, you need to train her

but my family ruined that by completely undoing the behaviour every single time they came over (we live near each other so see each other most days) because they don’t think she needs the training.

so they got excited to see her when they saw her and she responded in kind?

are you alone with her?

so you’re currently doing training? how
long for?

Can you go out with the dog walker to see what strategies she uses ? It may be something simple such as having a treat at hand when other dogs approach?

when people come around, can you put her on a lead and reward her for sitting until she settles. Maybe get a friend to practice with.

Have you looked at YouTube? plenty of training videos on there. Ones I use include McCann, Kikopup, Will atherton.

I would go with a behaviourist as a starting point and work with them. It does seem your own bond is an issue as she finds everything else more interesting than listening to you, that's not a criticism. Also, and this isn't a criticism either, this is exactly why you don't buy dogs on impulse because the breeder was a horrible man etc. for all you know you could have bought yourself a lifetime of behavioural problems, although as a lifelong dog owner what you describe (as frustrating as I know it is for you) is nowhere near the extreme of what we would usually be concerned was irreversible behaviour. Don't lose hope but you will need to work on your bond with her. You need to become the most exciting thing in her world so that the only person she will listen to is you, and you can get there with hard work and commitment with the right behaviourist. Good luck x

Definitely ask the walker, it's a good starting point. I went to a puppy training course with mine and it wasn't that expensive. About 8 dogs were there together and it was once a week for 4 weeks. My cavapoo behaves totally different with each of us, she is relatively obedient with me and never jumps or begs for food but jumps and harrases everyone else and I think its cause I followed specific advice and of course no one else listened to me when I told them. She plays very rough with my DD who is always playing with her but it cuddly and affectionate with DS. I'm don't have much advice as I'm not very knowledgeable about dogs but your walker is!

You need to build your confidence. That's why she's OK with the walker. She sounds a lovely girl but needs boundaries and gentle encouragement.

1. Don't spend time saying no - instead say yes, and give her treat/praise when she's behaving. So if she sits calmly when you're cooking for example. Or if she doesn't bark when the doorbell rings.

1. Keep her on a house lead to control where she goes, stop her jumping etc
2. Don't allow toys in the sitting room.
3. Get her an indoor kennel for her to hide in when she needs quiet time
4. Use a long line on walks if she has no recall. Practice recall on the long line every time you go out
5. Teach her to ignore other dogs/people/squirrels/cats when you are out
6. Keep a ball/treats in your pocket to distract her on walks. She's a spaniel so will mostly walk nose down sniffing. She's a working breed and needs a job. So her job is to keep you in sight and to only be distracted by you. Don't allow her to go up to dogs or people. Sometimes you just need to change direction to break her fixation.

Put some treats in your pocket - high value things like ham or cheese. Every time she does something good, say yes immediately and give a treat. She'll gradually offer the behaviours that get the treat. Tell family to bugger off if they can't help you as they aren't being fair to the dog.

I think now she is more confident, you need to speak to an actual trainer and have some one-to-one sessions/ join group training (they’d be better advised on which one). If you haven’t actually done any training with her, how on earth do you expect her to know what to do?

Well done for helping gain her confidence though- that’s not easy.

You won’t get asked to leave a class, it’s literally why you’re there

google a class near you and go along, ask your dog walker for recommendations perhaps too - although ask her what she says/commands etc

if your dog behaves for her, the problem is that you’re not giving the consistent commands.

Calming biscuits work.

Benefits goodnight or Pooch &Mutt calming

Benefits Goodnight Dog Treats 130 g(Pack of 10) amzn.eu/d/2d1xITG

Pooch & Mutt - Calm & Relaxed, Natural Dog Treats (Wheat Free), Healthy and Low-Calorie, Pack of 6 amzn.eu/d/7GfT31m

You will see a huge difference.

Join the Facebook group Dog Training Advice and Support. They have brilliant guides for all these issues, as well as vets and behaviourists and who answer online queries. Can't recommend them enough.

A one to one behaviourist is your best bet I’d said, I spent about £300 on one but it really helped my reactive dog and me to build confidence and trust. It took a long time to see any results (and I mean like a year) but he’s 4 now and generally good, of course there’s situations/moments where I find his behaviour tricky but it’s much easier to redirect him and he’s not a robot so can’t expect perfection.

These problems aren't remotely unfixable so don't worry and you don't need to pay for a behaviourist.

Her behaviour is like a puppy you've just brought home. So treat her exactly like that. Go right back to the beginning and start there. It will take her a little longer because she's older and she's used to how things already are but she will absolutely improve and very, very quickly if you do it consistently for the next couple.of weeks.

Read about puppy training, use positive techniques only and look up Dog Training Advice and Support on Facebook. They have a lot of useful advice documents to read through for all of these issues.

Forget letting her off lead for now, give her a long line so she can wander about fairly freely and let her sniff around, chuck treats or toys for her to find.

You can also buy a comfortable harness where the lead attaches to the front of the chest. This will reduce pulling in the short term until you get good lead walking under control. Use a different lead entirely for heel practise.

Good luck OP!

The poor dog, this is the crux of the problem isn’t it.

You need to train your family first!
It sounds like you made progress so you know deep down what to do - be firmer with your family so they don't undo your good work.
I would ask your dog walker what strategies she uses, make sure you use the same words/commands on walks so your dog is not confused.
I also recommend the calming treats, they worked really well on my reactive spaniel!
Good luck.

I've got a very nervy sprocker, and highly recommend training classes - I explained that I had issues with her, and the trainer was amazing. We saw her twice outside of the classes as a private client so we could walk together and get tips on managing her nervous energy. We always use a calming supplement (Nutripaw) along with a probiotic as it helps them hand in hand. We avoid busy walks, the dog has a safe space away from visitors/noise at home, and we have 2 long off lead walks a day so she's not bouncing off the walls with energy.

I'm not aiming this at you at all OP but whoever thought that cross breeding 2 highly intelligent and high energy dogs like cockers and poodles needed their head reading. They may not moult but they're not dogs for inexperienced owners - a dog walking friend has one, and even now she's 6 she's an absolute nutcase of a dog.

Your Vet may be able to recommend a good local behaviourist, or your insurance company. You can also get stronger calming medication via your vet - we use this on holidays when ours gets really stressed.