Someone tell me to get a grip please!

[Tiredandtearful121790]

Dh is going away (abroad) for 1 week tomorrow. I'm happy for him. He's visiting family and hasn't been able to go for about 6 or 7 years.

But I'm being silly and emotional and really don't want him to go. I haven't said this to him, obviously. But did have a cry today. It only occurred to me in the last 7 years, we haven't had a night away from each other

I'm very independent so quite surprised at myself. Kids are upset, so that probably fueling my emotions. And I will cry after he leaves tomorrow.

Anyways. I'm being really silly and need someone to tell me to grow up please!

Grow up!

I love it when DH goes away, quiet evening, eat what I like, less mess, choice in the TV, bed to myself.

What not to like?

Get a grip!

I’d be upset too but mostly because I’d have to do childcare on my own for a week …..

Grow up!! Lol.. it’s only for a week

I think it’s quite cute and you’re lucky that you have a relationship like that! I’m sure you’ll be totally fine though and I agree seeing the kids upset will be making you feel worse. I’m sure it’ll go really quickly once he’s set off.

I know. But I should add We have 4 kids. So yay fun for me! Lol

You are probably fuelling your children’s upset tbh

I had 3 including twins less than 3 years apart.

It’s not that bad!!

@DaughterNo2 I haven't been upset in front of them. It's more my daughter she's a daddy's girl.

It'll go quickly, I'm sure your busy with 4 children so the time will fly by.

@Scarletttulips oh I know. The silly thing is I do all child care so won't make any difference to me. I have 4 in 6 years.aged 4, 6 8 and 10

My DP goes away alot.
Sometimes I feel really upset and cry, sometimes I don't.
But I always love changing the bedding as soon as he's gone and having fresh bedding (and we eat food he doesn't like).

@Nudgethatjudge that's true! I've already promised pizza delivery!

Also this is lighthearted. I know I'm being silly

Get a bloody grip! It’s a week, it will pass quickly. Don’t make him feel guilty for taking one week out of 7 years to spend time with his family. Stop crying and tell him when he gets back you’re going to organise having some time to yourself. Will give you something to look forward to!

OK former military wife here:

Day one and two will be awful.

Day three and four testing but much better.

Day five and six quite enjoyable. 😀

Day seven he’ll be back.

The best advice I can give you is arrange everything to suit yourself. Don’t try and be superwoman. You will be doing all of the heavy lifting with 4 dc so use paper plates, eat beige food from the freezer, apples for pudding, allow more screen time than usual, pack them off to bed early, watch lovely romantic dramas or whatever you like on Netflix. Ask for help from friends or family if you need it half way through the week to give yourself a break, or at least see a friend then if you can.

Good luck. You’ll be fine! 👍

Think of all the partners whose other halves are away from home/the country regularly! You don’t know how lucky you are. Wow

I’d say get a grip but I’d be upset too, as would DH. I had to stay away for two nights the year before last and you would’ve thought we were never going to see each other again. Neither of us sleeps great without the other.

It sounds like you have a lovely relationship and your kids have a great father. It’s good that you know you’re being silly too!

Enjoy the fact you will miss him, from what I read on here, lots of people aren’t fortunate to have a partner they miss!

@TheChosenTwo I haven't made him feel guilty. He doesn't know I'm upset. I said that in my OP. It's lighthearted. And I'm being silly.

We own a few businesses together and to be fair I'm tired and will have a lot of work to do with kids too. I haven't said one word to him

Just don't have any friends to talk to and it was supposed to be a bit lighthearted making fun of myself.

Totally understandable that, if you haven’t had a night apart for seven years, it feels a bit weird and unsettling that he’s going away for a week.

Im sure that once he’s been gone for a night or two and you’ve got past the initial unfamiliarity, you’ll quite enjoy a few nights of peace and solitude before he comes home.

Oh blimey, I love it when DH goes away... go to bed when I want (with no "that's early!" Remarks), eat what I want, watch what I want..!

I have got teens now though, so that helps

DH has moved one of his hobbies so he now does it on a day I'm at work and he's not and I quite miss those evenings to myself a couple of times a month!
The children are upset because you are. DH went away with friends for a few days in October DS was really excited as we had fun things planned for just the two of us, DH has similar planned for when I go on a hen weekend next month, no tears will be shed by any of us, it's normal and healthy to occasionally spend time away from your spouse for social, family, work, hobby reasons.

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