Dear MilanHilton,
Of course you are NOT being unreasonable!
I couldn't believe it when I saw how many people thought you were!!
For far from the first time I have concluded that asking this website for any kind of opinion unless it be the best way to get blind drunk as fast as possible, is just to throw yourself to the wolves of self-opinionated ignorance!
Please ignore them! Frankly they do not know what they are talking about. Their own prejudices are so obvious.
If you decide you want to get better educated then you go ahead. Mature Students with principled motivation are easily the best. I have taught them. Nobody can say to you that you 'should not do it' once you you get a place in Medical School. In many ways it's the best way round, to study after you have raised your children beyond the baby and toddler stage.
I am so distraught about your bad experience(s) too at the hands of the medical profession. I too can sympathise. I and my firstborn also nearly died. In fact the Midwife gave my baby up for dead, draping her on the trolley next to me and the Doctor told me afterwards he was sure I was dead. It has never left me although it was many years ago.
I returned to Uni in my early 40s, initially thinking of studying for 5 to 6 years while working part-time through the degrees. However I did well in the first degree and my career took off in a different direction so I studied longer and worked while doing so by teaching in the University. It was not as though I was supported at home either. My husband died horribly at the end of my first year. It gave me stronger reasons to get on with it and be well qualified to provide for my children.
I think people here are of a different group who do not understand what it means to study for years and to be part of a University department. You will find it exhilarating. Of course it will be tough and you will know many late nights studying but it will be worthwhile. Take each module at a time and don't try to imagine it all in one go. Start revision early with good revision plans and make small revision 'maps' or spiders' webs, or however you see them, of each topic written very small and colour or hi-light the bits that go together. Learn these. You'll see these in your exams. I'm sure it's how I got a first in every exam I did.
This is obviously no pipe dream for you. You sound to me as though you have done the ground work very assiduously, looking into the courses for people like yourself. It might be worth contacting the Dean of the Medical School and asking if there is anybody to whom you may talk about your wishes to study at your age. I am absolutely sure they will welcome you. If you can give 10 years then you are of value.
Also you seem sure you will be 'putting my young family through a decade of financial and emotional stress'. Maybe the budget might need attention but it is possible to be happy without spending lots of money. So long as you can cover the essentials. In a hospital there are jobs you can take that pay quite well which you can do part-time. For example, I nearly trained as a Phlebotomist while I was doing my Research Degree in a big hospital. Taking blood is paid fairly well and you'd be on the spot to do it.
As for the stress, it may well be good stress. My children were amazingly supportive, the youngest loved learning some of my quite esoteric neurological stuff and we even moved house while I was in the middle of some important exams. They seemed fine with it and liked meeting the people I was with at University. There were other Mature Students on my course. It will open up a lovely world for you. And the converse is what will you be like in ten years if you are saying 'I always wanted to study Medicine but I had to put the family finances etc. first. They're old enough not to need me now, but it's too late for me to do what I would have loved....' You know, old people apparently say they only regret the things they didn't do. They say they regret they played safe and missed their opportunities...
Get out there and do it! You will make a difference to so many people. And that will feed back to your children and they will grow because of you. Go on! Make them proud!