To not want to see photos, even after a couple of years

[Seeksk44]

I broke up with my ex a couple of years ago. His decision, where he turned cold and nasty and said some hurtful things to me, but I'd ignored some red flags along the way, two of which were being critical of me and his drinking a lot at times. However, I'm over all this now.

I've recently been in a position where I've seen some photos of him on social media on "mad nights out" before Christmas with mutual friends and felt myself a bit "triggered" by this so have removed myself from being in a position to see this and feel better again. The mutual friends are lovely, but I really don't want to see photos and videos of him out partying - AIBU?

Completely understandable. My ex's face is incredibly triggering to me.

Just felt I'd to do what's right for me but don't want to seem pretty or as if I'm not over him, because I am, but did a lot of work to get myself here.

No of course not! You can restrict your view rather than delete or block it won’t come up then

No, nothing wrong with that at all. It's advised after a breakup to concentrate on yourself and not know what an ex is up to.

About 10 years ago, about 5 months after I broke up with someone, I unfollowed him on facebook and then unfollowed our mutual friends as I found myself getting really upset when seeing their interactions, photos etc.

About a year later I unfriended most of them when I found I was torturing myself by looking on their pages when bores or unhappy. We had no real life contact at this time so there was no point remaining "friends"

These were acts of self love and really good for my mental health. If you need to unfollow people then do it!

I recently came across some old photos of my ex, and after consideration, I shredded them. It was a calm and rational move in order to further expurgate his presence from my memories. It feels better, knowing that I will never accidentally come across the photos again. Nothing wrong with having a clearout.

Like you, I feel it's good for my mental health. I know it may seem silly to be triggered by something like this, but everyone is different.

YANBU at all. You were obviously hurt by his behaviour and the nature of the break-up, and it's completely understandable that you wouldn't to be reminded of it with photos of him popping up. You're doing the right thing for your own wellbeing. It doesn't mean that you aren't over him - it just means that you'd rather not be reminded of a horrible time.

Yes, you are spot on. The less reminders, the better for me.

Good for you. Seems a proactive choice to improve your mental health.

I did similar after a breakup - it was the best thing I did for myself mentally.

Thanks, all. Feel so much better already knowing no more photos are going to be popping up!