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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To go to A & E?

338 replies

AlwaysAnxiousAnnie · 31/12/2023 19:36

For some.time.now I've had major anxiety about my heart due to an episode last year of very bad heart palpitations, lasted hours and was so scary. It was like my heart was so out of rhythm. I went to A and E and they said it's anxiety, I've had numerous ECG, I've had a 24 hr heart monitor. They said they found nothing of concern just ectopic beats and and atrial thud. Apparently this is no cause for concern. So I was discharged from cardiology. I regularly have heart palpitations, chest pain, dizziness, breathlessness. Again it's anxiety apparently. Alas, I have developed this cardiac anxiety.
Anyway, tonight after studying up after dinner, my heart out of no where just started beating so hard and so fast in my chest. It felt like it was going to explode. Straight away I panicked, and then tried to calm myself down. I've so ce managed to calm myself but I heart beat feels all over the place. No pain or anything else. Its new Year's Eve and A&E will be busy. My DH is not very happy with me telling me not to go because it's all in my head. I've convinced myself.i won't see morning or at the very least my heart is about to give up very soon. Now I'm in this spiral of death anxiety of I could drop dead and be dead by this next time year and no one is believing me about my heart problem...am I being unreasonable to want to go to A & E and get checked out or ring 111 at th very least.. or am I just being dramatic, an anxious mess. The more I'm panicking the worst it's getting but I wasn't panicking when it first started this evening.

OP posts:
Original poster
AlwaysAnxiousAnnie · 31/12/2023 21:58

I think for me it's the uncertainty that something could be wrong but no one knows what. They've given me the beta blockers but only because they don't know what else to do. They are commonly prescribed for anxiety. But my issue is I've convinced myself this isn't anxiety.

OP posts:
mommatoone · 31/12/2023 21:59

HMW1906 · 31/12/2023 21:46

So you’ve been given treatment for your issues but not actually bothered to take any of it, beta blockers or diazepam? What exactly do you think they’re going to do in A&E on New Years Eve if you can’t actually be bothered to take the treatment you’ve previously been given! 🙄. Don’t waste their time and take the medications you’ve already been prescribed!

Show quote history

There are two references in your post that refer to the OP ' not being bothered ' to take the meds. You clearly dont understand how anxiety works!

Strawberryjams · 31/12/2023 22:00

But then you take them nothing improves and they will do further checks. If you don’t follow their rules to count things out then they can’t proceed.

Bestyearever2024 · 31/12/2023 22:00

widowtwankywashroom · 31/12/2023 21:57

If you find it hard to trust, why are you thinking of going to A and E??
Why would you trust what they say?

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All the bugs and viruses flying around A & E! The thought of them give me anxiety 🤣

I'd much prefer a BB or a valium in the safety of my own home 🙂

Rescue2024 · 31/12/2023 22:00

I say this very kindly, you are at a loss with your worries, nothing is working for you at this time so how about trying the meds you are prescribed for 4 months and see what happens?

it either helps or it doesn’t , it can hardly make things as bad for you as it is now?

Namechange4448830938489 · 31/12/2023 22:00

In that case I would say that if you feel better talking about it then it is purely anxiety and this is distracting you from the symptoms.

I can see where the people who are talking all kinds of every medical condition can cause alarm.

Have you thought that if you had taken the diazepam when you started this thread you could be having a nice enjoyable evening with your husband?

widowtwankywashroom · 31/12/2023 22:00

mommatoone · 31/12/2023 21:59

There are two references in your post that refer to the OP ' not being bothered ' to take the meds. You clearly dont understand how anxiety works!

Show quote history

Well maybe the OP wouldn't be anxious if she took the bloody medication

Mrsttcno1 · 31/12/2023 22:00

OP I mean this is the kindest way, but this is not the place for you. You’ve been seen by medical processionals who have run tests and cleared you, you’ve been given medication that will ease your symptoms and are not taking it. Posting here and reading over all of these replies is not going to help your anxiety. Play with your child, watch tv, speak to your husband, take the medication, have a cup of tea- take your mind off it. THAT is what will help you, because every second you spend on here keeps this running through your mind.

steff13 · 31/12/2023 22:01

Strawberryjams · 31/12/2023 22:00

But then you take them nothing improves and they will do further checks. If you don’t follow their rules to count things out then they can’t proceed.

Yeah, exactly this. If you never take the medication for the anxiety they will never eliminate anxiety as the cause of the issue and whatever underlying cause might be there won't be found. Not that I think there's probably an underlying cause the issue is most likely anxiety. It's a lot of people hearing hoof beats in this thread and looking for zebras.

Pripsen · 31/12/2023 22:02

Not sure why so many people are fixated on POTS as the cause, when clearly her anxiety related cognitions aren’t just related to potential POTS symptoms. It’s the anxiety driving everything at the root.

Even though you are frustrating, I do feel sorry for you. You have tried therapy and you can reflect why doctors and your husband (and many posters here) find you very frustrating! If I were your DP I would probably be giving you an ultimatum about taking the prescribed medication tbh

Anxiety is a bitch - a lying bitch. Don’t listen to it. Listen to professionals who are telling you what you need to do.

Bestyearever2024 · 31/12/2023 22:03

Get some of the lovely herbal night time teas from H & Barret, drink with a little honey and a valium and or a BB. You'll feel lush and calm

Redglitter · 31/12/2023 22:03

AlwaysAnxiousAnnie · 31/12/2023 21:58

I think for me it's the uncertainty that something could be wrong but no one knows what. They've given me the beta blockers but only because they don't know what else to do. They are commonly prescribed for anxiety. But my issue is I've convinced myself this isn't anxiety.

Classic anxiety. Believe me I know

Theyre not going to give you something just because they don't know what's wrong. If they had concerns they'd do more tests.

Before you go back to the doc or A&E you have to start taking the beta blockers.

You've been for tests they think the best course of action is beta blockers. You refuse to take them so obviously nothings going to improve.

You have a possible solution to your problem but you refuse to take it, and refuse to help yourself

If you do to the doc or A&E and they know you've not taken them you can pretty much guarantee they'll send you home with instructions to take them & do pretty much nothing else

Take the tablets

Nttttt · 31/12/2023 22:05

OP update us when you take them and how you feel - YOU’VE GOT THIS! ❤️❤️

Bigcoatweather · 31/12/2023 22:06

OP I occasionally used to take 2mg or more of diazepam if needed to help me with a severe flying phobia. 2mg is such a small dose.
I understand that you’re scared, but that’s what the medication is for. It won’t make you feel out of it, it will just take the edge off and slow your thoughts down to a more comfortable rate.
You need to take it so that you can see the difference.
Take a big breathe and just do it. You have significant anxiety which is making you avoid things and giving you the feeling of doom. That’s just your anxiety. So take your tablet to see if it works - it will be out of your system by tomorrow morning and then you can reassess.

0MammaBear0 · 31/12/2023 22:06

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This reply has been hidden until the MNHQ team can have a look at it.

Bestyearever2024 · 31/12/2023 22:07

Also (sorry, I keep thinking of things) put your ear buds in and listen to this. I find her so calming

Nttttt · 31/12/2023 22:07

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Bloops · 31/12/2023 22:07

I've suffered with palpitations, missing/extra beats and general cardiac anxiety for most of my life. Its fucking miserable. When I feel it coming on, I get a cold drink and run the cold water over my wrists. Cold helps. I read something on my phone too, like the news. It passes eventually. You just have to ride it out and recognise the signs.

isthisrockbottomyet · 31/12/2023 22:07

OP, you say your mind won't let you take the tiny dose of beta blocker.

Well bypass your mind. Get the tiny dose (the actual size or half a tablet or whatever) ready, put it on the table in front of you.

Then at some point make your arms do the actions to take the tablet. No more assessing whether you want to or not, no more THINKING.

I know that sounds silly but oddly it can sometimes work.

I do know exactly where you're coming from and this thread is actually perfectly timed for me, as I'm getting ectopic beats and anxiety and indigestion and worrying it's something significant. Reading other people's stories helps a lot and makes me realise what I'm experiencing really isn't that unusual and how common it is to feel anxious with these relatively mild symptoms. Sitting with the anxiety and uncertainty is sometimes all you can do. Not that I would rule out ever going to A&E but it's not always appropriate and if I had medication available I'd take that first.

One thing I've found when afraid to take medication is that once I've made my arms and hands do the actions needed for me to take it, and I've taken it, the sense of relief is HUGE as soon I no longer have to agonise over it. Once I'm committed and it's done, it's so much easier. And then... nothing bad has ever happened so far, despite my feeling of near certainty that something would.

merryandbrightdelight · 31/12/2023 22:09

Nttttt · 31/12/2023 20:17

OP please read this

I have horrendous health OCD and anxiety. I’ve had therapy all year been on multiple medications and I’m currently pregnant and it’s great because everything that I feel I put down to a pregnancy symptom. I’m actually classed as in recovery by my therapist. I’m scared to have my baby incase it gets bad again.

So this time last year I couldn’t leave the house except for work (which I would also miss sometimes) because I couldn’t hear the word “stroke.” Someone would say the word stroke like “stroke the dog” and I would start having stroke symptoms. I would smell burning all the time and it would be set off by the toaster, people smoking near me or outside my window and it would send me into a terrified spiral I would be cowered in a ball unable to do anything and begging someone to call an ambulance.

Prior to this I had the same issues with my heart. This went on since I was 16 until 28. I had so many ECGs in a&e or by the dr. I had an ultrasound of my heart. They told me I had mild PVCs which terrified me, I KNEW they were missing something. I could be triggered by anything even things I didn’t notice (watching something intense on TV - heart rate raises.) you could see my heart pounding through my chest.

I’ve had a plethora of other issues from MS to really rare diseases and what I see now, wasted a lot of NHS time and resources (CT scans, MRI, blood test, consultant appointments).

But I have reasons as to why it got so bad. I was medically dismissed with women’s health issues and drs found nothing until a routine smear (I’d asked for a smear for years but wasn’t allowed until 25) I had CIN 3 which had to be removed under GA they they found a polyp I needed removing and I had lots of cysts on my ovaries. (I’m so lucky to be pregnant now!) I also had a medical scare which was legit and put me in hospital abroad which scared the crap out of me. I also love my mum but I feel her input sometimes can be unhelpful as she is also worried because of my symptoms which have previously ended up being serious problems.

2 things helped me.

  1. Medication/therapy. I was on sertraline for years and also tried other medications but if you want my honest opinion only one thing helped during those panic induced “I need to go to a&e” moments and that was diazepam (2mg so a tiny amount.) I was given this in a&e by a dr who finally listened to me and could see I was so scared after going in for heart problems. It’s not right for everyone but I only take it WHEN I NEED IT. It’s super addictive and can become less potent the more you take it. She recommended it twice a day for a few weeks but I was far too scared to take that much incase it harmed me . After 45 mins I don’t give a crap if I have a heart problem lol I just want to chill and have a good evening.
  2. Sitting with uncertainty. I was feeding the beast by going into a&e. It’s what my compulsive behaviours were egging me to do. Starving the beast was the only thing which helped the compulsions naturally stop. Calling people I knew would feed the beast also didn’t help. Have someone (maybe husband) who is reasonable and will stay with you and tell you that they will look after you and if you need immediate attention they will know and be there to call an ambulance, I can promise they will never feel worried enough to do so.

My symptoms during these periods were much more believable and prominent than actual issues I had and I was never panicked by actual health issues. I never thought I could have a baby, mainly because my previous issues but also because I didn’t think I would cope, especially with the appointments and all the medical chat, but here I am!

Sorry how long this is, I hope this helps. Try and sit with your uncertainties and see how you feel tomorrow x

This!!!

Bestyearever2024 · 31/12/2023 22:11

Bloops · 31/12/2023 22:07

I've suffered with palpitations, missing/extra beats and general cardiac anxiety for most of my life. Its fucking miserable. When I feel it coming on, I get a cold drink and run the cold water over my wrists. Cold helps. I read something on my phone too, like the news. It passes eventually. You just have to ride it out and recognise the signs.

Exactly! Vagus nerve reset

Or ice cubes down each side of your neck

Or a very cold shower

It resets you

Nttttt · 31/12/2023 22:11

merryandbrightdelight · 31/12/2023 22:09

This!!!

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Thank you! I really hope it helps OP or anyone else in this situation. I was so alone and constantly posting on forums and wish someone else told me this x

mommatoone · 31/12/2023 22:13

widowtwankywashroom · 31/12/2023 22:00

Well maybe the OP wouldn't be anxious if she took the bloody medication

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Well that goes without saying🙄
But her anxiety is stopping her from doing so! Is it that difficult for people to get their head around that ?

porridgeisbae · 31/12/2023 22:14

@AlwaysAnxiousAnnie Could you take one of the diazepam now? It's only a small dose. It might chill you out a bit.

And start taking what you're prescribed.

Make it your new year's resolution. Smile

You could go to A&E if you like but it'd probably be stressful, boring, and annoying.

Think of your husband and the impact your condition is having on him. Take your medication so he can see you're trying to get better by following medical advice.

widowtwankywashroom · 31/12/2023 22:14

mommatoone · 31/12/2023 22:13

Well that goes without saying🙄
But her anxiety is stopping her from doing so! Is it that difficult for people to get their head around that ?

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You have an infection you take medication
So if you have anxiety you take medication

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