To think you wait to organise the next visit?

[newoldfluff]

Every single time we go and visit a certain relative of DH's with the kids they get about one hour into the visit before they are trying to ask when the next one will be. Every single time. They also have a habit of taking while the kids are in the room and saying we'll go to eg. Lego land next time, or stay for 3 nights instead of 1 next time. AIBU to say it's bad form and sort of implies the current visit isn't good enough?

Sounds like my ex-MIL, used to drive me up the wall. It was all about pinning you down face to face. No advice, but you’re not unreasonable for this to make you batty

I had to nip this one in the bud by refusing to commit to anything until I'd sorted out my work schedule. Which could clearly never be checked on the spot.

Yes! That's what we've been doing. I'm really not keen on them getting the kids involved though. It seems manipulative.

My Great Grandmother was like that. Couldn’t live in the moment, always had to be planning the next thing or visit. She’d sit on her “trip of a lifetime” holiday looking at travel brochures for the next one. We’d be barely in the door as children before she’d be asking when we were coming next.

It was a symptom of her life long mental health problems, anxiety and chronic severe depression - she always had to have something to look forward to, which was almost more pleasurable than the event itself.

Which isn’t to say that’s the case with your relative, nor do you have to go along with it, but it’s not necessarily just “bad form” or a type of indirect complaint.