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AIBU?

Sleeping on an airbed?

34 replies

Christmasgrinch234 · 31/12/2023 12:44

I know this isn’t the end of the world, but I think being sleep deprived and being expected to sleep on an air bed tonight is rubbing me up the wrong way. My family was hosting Xmas. Everyone had a bed apart from us (myself, DH & DD 2 months). We were downstairs on a deflating airbed. We did switch to sleeping on the sofas in the living room on night two as we woke up literally on the floor after night one.

Night two was slightly better as it was easier to feed DD and better than essentially on the floor. We’ve been asked for tonight to not be on the sofas as it means they can’t watch tele first thing (there is another tele in the house if they’re that desperate). Being in the other room on the airbed means there’s barely any room to move in, having to change DD on the floor/nowhere to put her bits etc.

My family are also hosting something tonight. We’ve said we’re going to drive home and come back tomorrow. I’ve been made out to feel like I’m some prized ungrateful princess.

DH thinks they’re out of order for us for giving us such little regard in the pecking order. SIL said the kids should be on the floor and us in their room.

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

69 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
9%
You are NOT being unreasonable
91%
Curiosity101 · 31/12/2023 14:10

It probably is wonderful for your parents to have everyone under one roof

That doesn't mean it isn't unpleasant sleeping arrangements for you.

"We're going to set off home tonight at <x>. What time should we aim to be back tomorrow, we were thinking <y>?" You've already mentioned the reason by the sounds of it so no need to reiterate the air mattress. It's good to start working on enforcing healthy boundaries.

And if they counter with something about getting a new air mattress you just hold firm. "We really need to get as much of a proper night's sleep as we can. I think it'll be best if we do that at home. We'll be back at <y>"

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jeffuk2015 · 31/12/2023 14:16

"I’ve been made out to feel like I’m some prized ungrateful princess."

Airbed vs no airbed is not even the issue when you stop and think about it.
The issue is controlling and guilt-shaming behaviour.
Like many others, I like my own space. People can f**king annoying, including family.
Being stoic here benefits nobody. Go home and tend your body's needs.

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Turmerictolly · 31/12/2023 14:21

Go home after the gathering and return tomorrow (as long as it's not too far away and one is happy to drive).

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persisted · 31/12/2023 14:23

I have learned that what My parents consider to be 'wonderful' often translates as a shit time for me. After various shenanigans last year I have stopped playing.

Getting up and down from an airbed is hard enough, let alone with a baby shortly after birth. They are being ridiculous to expect it.

The children suck it up and go on the airbed, who cares if they argue, or you go home.

Any accusations of being a drama queen ' yes, damn right I am. I'm nacred and my back hurts, you sleep on the floor if your that keen. We'll see you in the morning.'

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PiggieWig · 31/12/2023 14:24

The kids can’t share in case they argue? I can’t think of anything more likely to cause an argument between a couple than being forced to sleep on an airbed with their two month old baby. What about you and DH?

You aren’t a princess for wanting to go home. You are a saint for having stuck it out so long.

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PegasusReturns · 31/12/2023 14:30

Who wants to watch TV in the morning and why does it matter whether you are on the sofa or on the air bed - are you not entitled to some peace and quiet and privacy?!

id be leaving is making other plans for tomorrow

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TedWilson · 31/12/2023 16:00

Who puts a new mum on the floor ffs. OP I'm angry on your behalf.

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Youcannotbeseriousreally · 31/12/2023 16:09

I don’t understand why you’ve not just gone home?

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Sherrystrull · 31/12/2023 16:20

Please can you clarify who is in each bedroom and whose house it is. Thanks

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