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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think it's ok to buy stuff in charity shops?

115 replies

leweekend · 17/03/2008 08:11

I think it's fine, but a couple of people I know really sneer at this.

We're ok financially, but would rather spend money on holidays, going out etc than on everday clothes. And sometimes you can get really great stuff secondhand, which can be better than new stuff.

We do buy new things as well!

Have changed name because a few people/family members know me on here...

OP posts:
harpsichordcarrier · 17/03/2008 09:02

I really don't get why this would be a problem.
sounds to me like total snobbery and shallowness tbh.
do people really admit to judging other people on how much money they spend on stuff?
if I really did have that attitude I would keep absolutely schtum about it, I can tell you, because it would say a great deal about my values.

cmotdibbler · 17/03/2008 09:05

I love charity shops, and have bought stuff in there from being a teenager. Now it means I can buy up a grade from what I would have bought new, but I also have a serious book habit that must be fed !

My first house was entirely furnished from the Sue Ryder sales.

Miaou - why not join Freecycle and ask if anyones got a spare ironing board ? If you weren't so far from me you could have the one that my mother decided we should have in addition to the perfectly good one that she doesn't like..

EasterBunnylicious · 17/03/2008 09:06

Don't worry miaou, you are allowed to buy and ironing board

Marmaduke that sounds great, and think of the achievement you feel from actually making it rather than buying it.

Casbie, I do admit some charity shops are really expensive! You could go to Primark and get new stuff cheaper, but I just have to remind myself that Primark clothes come at another cost (not that I judge people for shopping in Primark - I love it, but I seem to have found these ethics from somewhere )

So do you think we've driven the point home to the OP enough!

Sorry leweekend, I didn't mean to come over all preachy! I've just started to feel rather strongly about this.

harpsichordcarrier · 17/03/2008 09:09

tell your ILs they are being extremely déclassé

DumbledoresGirl · 17/03/2008 09:16

Enjoy it while you can, I say. I am deeply jealous of all you people looking to dress and find toys for little children because there is so much stuff out there, in charity shops, second hand sales, ebay, etc.

I have always bought second hand if I could but now my children are older, it is becoming increasingly difficult to find anything suitable.

I was sorting through old clothes yesterday and have 2 big binbags full of stuff to take to the charity shop later today. As I was sorting it, I was thinking about where the stuff had come from originally. It was almost entirely either bought second hand, donated to me by a friend (and still in good condition) or bought new for me by family. That won't be the case for the next set of clothes I donate to charity as I am having to buy much more of it new now.

berolina · 17/03/2008 09:18

I love second-hand/charity shops. When buying clothes for dses I look there first (not so much for me, because I buy as few clothes as possible for myself anyway and I am short and can barely find stuff that fits decently in germany, so wait till we go to the UK and buy from the petite ranges). Berlin is full of extremely cool second-hand shops. Dses have a number of really excellent toys from them too.

berolina · 17/03/2008 09:19

DG, what sizes are your children? I can keep them in mind when I look in the second-hand children's shops here - there is a lot of baby stuff but there seems also to be plenty for older children.

belgo · 17/03/2008 09:19

There are second hand shops in Belgium but they are not charity shops, and they are out to make a profit, which mean they are rather expensive.

mousemole · 17/03/2008 09:22

I am now dedicated to buying from charity shops for DS1 and DS2. I cant justify buying new. Only exception is if they receive new clothes as presents. I just think its another great way to recycle.

TsarChasm · 17/03/2008 09:34

I think they're great too. They have saved me a fortune over the years. I buy new things too, but the bargains to be had on things in excellent condition in charity shops are amazing.

I'll be honest. I wouldn't buy for example a Monsoon dress for dd's even in the sale from Monsoon. But I've had many gorgeous ones second hand and I don't mind the girls wearing them and I don't get all stressed that they might drop something on it cos it cost £70 or whatever. Which is how it should be with kids clothes.

Ikwym about other people's attitudes though. I just don't ever mention it much to my friends. I don't know about sneering, don't think they'd do that, but I think a couple might feel sorry for me which I'd hate and isn't necessary at all.

With dd1 I was very snooty about such things and would never have dreamed of buying anything other than new. More fool me. Having 3 meant I had to change that line of thinking.

Mil gently made me see the madness of this. She might be batty sometimes but by God she can hunt out some fab stuff in a charity shop. It's an art with her.

PersephoneSnape · 17/03/2008 09:34

i go to my local salvation army at least twice a week. they do childrens clothes 2 for £1 and a coat i got on saturday for ds2 had a pound coin in the pocket (yes, will put it in charity box) and a dead tamagotchi that I'll get a new battery for sometime this week.

my living room sofas (dfs, thank you!) were £50 for two. Why would anyone but 1st hand? the only clothes i buy 'new' for the children are pants/socks/vests/tights/shoes.. everything else is gap, next, marks and sparks etc and in very good condition.

JingleyJen · 17/03/2008 09:34

I have found some great things in charity shops.

DumbledoresGirl · 17/03/2008 09:40

Berolina, how sweet of you. I only buy for my oldest son and my daughter. He is coming up 12 and she is coming up 8. There is actually still quite a bit for my dd, but it is usually too tarty. And ds1 does not like football or skateboarding or skulls.

I think my problem is also partly that I simply do not like clothes for older children, regardless of whether they are new or in charity shops, whereas with little children you have far more choice and things look cuter.

rookiemater · 17/03/2008 09:45

Actually these days I think its very up to date to buy things second hand. We have furniture from the British Heart Foundation shop, clothes and toys from the NCT sale and books from the charity shops.

Anyone who looks down on it has funny values in my mind. I'm proud of buying second hand not ashamed, mind you maybe thats because we can afford to buy things new if we wanted to. Maybe the social stigma is if you can't afford new,again I'm not saying I agree with that at all, but then saying that Tesco is probably cheaper than some of the stuff anyhow.

CoolYerBoots · 17/03/2008 09:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

mousemole · 17/03/2008 09:50

Yes I just bought 2 second hand sofas instead of new ones. They are lovely and are going to be receovered. I feel so much better reusing things than buying a new sofa.

TheDukesofHapHazzard · 17/03/2008 09:51

give my kids a £1 and point them in the direction of the local charity shop nd they will be happy for hours.

In fact i was a charity shop manager for many years and all the kids baby stuff came from there. ( buggy,, moses basket, pram, toys, clothes..all in the days before they could no longer sell lots of it). I have an arrangement with a good friend who is the manager of a nearby shop, if something baby wse or toys wise come in that she is unsure of, i will price it for her or find a good home for it for free ( the law has changed and they can no longer sell car seats, prams or cots).

I m always on the look out for a good jumble sale too, but that might be stepping over the cheapskate line and going into down right hippie-dom!!!

lucykate · 17/03/2008 09:56

i go round our local charity shops once a week, have got loads of good stuff. the prices they charge has increased, but when it's for cancer research etc, i don't mind paying it. also go to car boot/jumble sales too.

berolina · 17/03/2008 09:59

what sort of height is that DG? Germans size clothes by height.

davidtennantsmistress · 17/03/2008 10:04

nope I do, or ebay stuff. nout wrong with 2nd hand & hand me downs - where I used to live there was quite a few of us with kids all 6 months younger than each other so we'd all do a big swop every few months and pass the clothes over.

also got DS a fantastic thick duffle coat from a charity shop for £2.50 - was one of the £20 ones from woolies had never been worn. was dead chuffed, and it's done him for 2 winters. (ok was slightly long in the arms when I got it but couldn't refuse at that price! )

berolina · 17/03/2008 10:05

DG - when you're coming up to needing something, just post saying 'bero are you going to any 2nd hand shops?' and I'll have a look - perfect excuse to coo over children's clothes opportunity to do a Good Turn

MadameCh0let · 17/03/2008 10:06

Of course it's ok. It's good for the environment to recycle. It raises money for people who need it.

If somebody thinks it's wrong or bad, then their priorities are a little out of kilter.

CrackerOfNuts · 17/03/2008 10:07

I love them, although possibly don't use them as much since I started using ebay.
In previous years though they were an absolute godsend, and all of my childrens clothes came from charity shops.

Now we use them mainly for books. The kids love to go in there with £1 and come out with a few books.

DumbledoresGirl · 17/03/2008 10:09

Berolina - are you serious about this? Ds1 is about 155cm and dd about 125-130cm. Both thin. I am only guessing heights based on the growth charts though, have not actually measured them!

ExtraFancy · 17/03/2008 10:09

I actually prefer shopping in charity shops - I love finding little bits and pieces, it's more interesting for me than going to a shop with rails and rails of the same things in different sizes etc.

I give my DS's old outgrown clothes to the charity shops too.

I am a bit of an eBay addict for the same reason!