I cooked tea tonight at DP. Simple stir fry. I did make a bit of a mess with the noodles and one got stuck on the hob. I told DP and immedietly said, I'm going to tidy it and sort it don't worry. I then got a whole mouth full of put downs from DP. "I told you to make it with love" "why can you never not make a mess". Slamming kitchen doors and slamming down plates. After eating I tidy and wash up as it's my mess. She picks up the pan and says have you scratched this was metal? I said no I used the plastic utensil as you saw me do.
I may sometimes make a mess whilst cooking, however I always tidy up after myself. It was like the world had ended and I had destroyed her hob. I apologised many times and said I was going to sort it but she kept going on making digs at me. I ended up crying. I've been having a tough time anyway recently and had been in a good/relaxed mood. DP didn't thank me for the food either.
It's not just this though. When I'm at DP I'm always on egg shells. Some things have got to be done certain ways and if they are not then its tutting and eye rolling and why have you done it like that. Even DP daughter says to me you know what she's like. Even DP family say the same. She has her funny ways. But I can't relax in fear I'm not going to do it "right"
I don't know if its relevant but we are a same sex couple.
AIBU for being totally exhausted by all this. Was the hob thing a big deal? I did end up cleaning it and it was absolutely fine, no trace left.