Back to work blues already

Floating101 · 2023-12-30T11:19:33+00:00

Back to work on Tuesday and the feeling of dread has started to build over the last few days. I feel absolutely sick at the thought of it. There’s a big project going on that is stressing me out so much, the Christmas break was all that kept me going in November, December and going back in Jan is just going to be dire. I know I need another job but can’t afford to drop any money as my mortgage is going up next year. There must be more to life! My last hope is a lottery win this evening. Can others relate? How can I stop worrying about work? I’m sure it isn’t healthy for it to be taking over my life like this.

2024name · 30/12/2023 11:49

I am so sorry that you feel like this. Work is often a big part of our lives, so dreading it can affect our ability to truly relax and enjoy our time off.

Is it the project that is causing you so much stress, or it is the work itself? If it is the project, then it will have an end date that you can work towards. If it is work itself, then looking for another job would probably be the best thing.

If you need another job, why not spend a bit of time over the next three days updating your CV and looking on Indeed or other employment sites. Sometimes, just making a start on changing the situation can stop us from feeling helpless.

If it is the project, then try to think about the specific details that are making you feel stressed. Do you feel that you do not have the skills to complete the project? Are the deadlines realistic? Is someone putting too much pressure on you? If you are being asked to do things outside your level of expertise, or the deadline is unrealistic, you may feel better if you raise this with whoever is leading the project.

I know I had a job that I started to hate. I felt much better, and much more detached from the pressure once I had committed to finding another job.

Wearegoingtoneedabiggerboat · 30/12/2023 12:03

I have wasted too many hours and ruined too many holidays worrying about going back to work when I have had leave. It’s easier said than done but now as soon as I leave my place of work either it be for a holiday, extended leave or just for the weekend, it goes in a box in my head with the lid firmly shut. I won’t talk about work when I am not there, it’s not good for your mental health. If something happened to you they would replace you in the blink of an eye, your family and friends would not.
as long as you know you are doing the best you can at work, then that’s all that matters. It helps that my senior management team are a bunch of fools who get it wrong all the time.

Original poster

Floating101 · 30/12/2023 17:20

Thanks both for your replies. Project does have an end date thankfully, I’ll be opening the champagne for that! I’m just completely overwhelmed with it and feel out of my depth. I think I will speak to my manager when I’m back as I think they are expecting too much from me.

I definitely need to detach from it when I’m not there. You’re right, I’d be forgotten and replaced in an instant.

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Sidebeforeself · 30/12/2023 17:23

Understand how you feel - Im the same. So much so i have decided to retire early. I will take a huge financial hit but its worth it to me to not have that kind of stress in my life

Original poster

Floating101 · 30/12/2023 17:36

Sidebeforeself · 30/12/2023 17:23

Understand how you feel - Im the same. So much so i have decided to retire early. I will take a huge financial hit but its worth it to me to not have that kind of stress in my life

That’s great, I’d definitely do the same if I was able to. Financial hit is worth it for some things.

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Sidebeforeself · 30/12/2023 17:38

@Floating101 I hope that wasn’t insensitive of me- I do realise Im very fortunate . I was just struck by how similar our feelings were!

Dotjones · 30/12/2023 17:42

I'm exactly the same. I've had a fortnight off work which was great at the start but by Tuesday this week I can't get the voice out of my head that's counting down the number of days left. I've always been like this, I'm just not the sort of person who is programmed for work - it's something stressful that drives you into an early grave and no matter how hard you apply yourself you barely earn enough to scrape by. Each year I get excellent appraisals followed by a pay rise that's actually a real-term pay cut.

FWIW (not much) I was like this with going back to school after the holidays. I always thought I'd get used to early mornings and long days once I'd been working a few years, but I'm half-way to retirement now and there's no sign of it happening yet. If anything it's getting worse.

Lovelycupofcoffee · 30/12/2023 17:42

Exactly the same here. I know I need to leave And soon. I was offered a new job last year but it was to far away. I need to up my job searching activities.

Hoglet70 · 30/12/2023 17:43

I'm like it every Sunday!

Ribenaberry12 · 30/12/2023 17:44

100%. I had a big cry today at the thought of going back to work. I’m gonna try and look after myself a bit better next year -eat better, more exercise. I’m hoping the better I feel the better I’ll be able to cope with it.

Original poster

Floating101 · 30/12/2023 18:28

Sidebeforeself · 30/12/2023 17:38

@Floating101 I hope that wasn’t insensitive of me- I do realise Im very fortunate . I was just struck by how similar our feelings were!

Bless you, no not at all! I hope to be able to do the same one day

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Original poster

Floating101 · 30/12/2023 18:42

I’m the same with counting down the days, it’s horrible isn’t it. I had 11 days and it was bliss to begin with. Now down to 2 left. I’m going to book my Easter leave as soon as I’m back to have something to count down to!
Eating healthy/more exercise is my plan as well, hopefully will be easier to cope with if I’m healthier. I have gained so much weight over this Christmas period - that’s a separate issue!

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Cotswoldbee · 30/12/2023 18:47

Floating101 · 30/12/2023 18:28

Bless you, no not at all! I hope to be able to do the same one day

Show quote history

I was the same.
After 41yrs of work I was thoroughly fed up and Sunday evenings, end of the Christmas break etc would have me getting a bit on edge.
The ironic thing was that I only worked 4-days (full time but had always only been 4-days), was good at my job and didn't even give it much headspace but I just hated having to go into the office (WFH was a boon for me).

Bit the bullet earlier this year and quit at the age of 57.
Yes I am financially secure (which of course helps A LOT!) but the peace of mind it gives me is beyond rubies and now the weeks just stretch out without any feeling of dread.

When I used to go in after the long Christmas/new year break I used to spend my first day sorting out my emails, filling in my new diary, calendar etc and it did act as a sort of therapy and gently nudge me into the new year.

Original poster

Floating101 · 30/12/2023 19:02

The thought of not having to work, I can only imagine. No Sunday night dread, I’d get fit and healthy and see more of my family. I think it’s sad people work all their lives and then when they can finally retire they often are no longer in good health at that point, seems so unfair. I’m 42 so still a long way off- shouldn’t wish my life away I know

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Sidebeforeself · 30/12/2023 19:43

I think it’s true that some people ( me!) just don’t thrive on work. Im not lazy and do work hard but for me it’s just cos I have bills to pay. I know i will not miss it at all once I stop.Life is for living and if you live through your work , good for you, but if not it is hard to keep going especially when you are in the later years of your working life.

auburnglow788 · 30/12/2023 19:52

I can totally relate. Every year, when I leave work for Christmas holidays, I promise myself I'll do my utmost to enjoy every minute because I know how I feel going back in January. I started dreading going back last Thursday (28th). I'm usually fine once I get there, but I think it's because I love spending time with my family and like many people out there, I spend more time with my work colleagues than with those I truly want to spend time with.

MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 01/01/2024 11:03

Me too, I actually quite like my job but it's not an easy job and is very emotionally draining.

What's worse is I know when I go back there is going to be a big restructure and we are all facing redundancies, job changes or reapplying for current jobs which feels frightening and over whelming..

BlueVixen · 01/01/2024 14:07

I know exactly that feeling! I'm sitting here, dreading tomorrow.

I started a new job about 8 weeks ago. All seemed well at first but then the cracks started to show. The woman who's job I'm supposed to be taking over when she goes off on mat leave is only 24 and has never trained anyone before. There is a bit of a language problem also. Then there's the fact that I learnt after the first week, I was supposed to be learning 2 other jobs also. It's very involved work and each of the jobs is quite different (all admin though). It got so that when I asked for help as I didn't understand/hadn't done/ had forgotten something, I either got told 'in a minute' in a short sharp reply (and then it didn't happen) and latterly, sighs and eye rolls. I feel like a complete nuisance and rather thick - but they have expected me to have an afternoon observing a task and then expected to remember it three weeks later! And, yes, I did take as many notes as I could but there are so many variables i.e. 'you do it like this except when this happens or this or this'. I've been constantly coming up with things I haven't come across. Also I've been told 'you've done that wrong, you do it like this'. I correct it but have said 'oh, I've not seen that before' to be told, in error, 'yes you have, we went through this'!

I'd speak to the line manager about it but she really doesn't care what the minions do, as long as the jobs get done. She will also ball people out in the office if they've done something wrong.

I understand everyone is stressed and has too much work to do but......

I've already pulled sick days (in my probation period - not good) because I'm so stressed about the whole situation. Almost hope they contact me later today and dismiss me but I can't afford it. My mental health has taken a huge hit. Even had nightmares about it all last night.

I've been on Indeed again but I don't know how I'd fit interviews in and how I'd explain my brief time with this company. I have to work or I'll lose my rented house.

Sorry for the tirade op's post struck a cord with me, still in bed, dreading tomorrow.

Original poster

Floating101 · 01/01/2024 23:14

BlueVixen · 01/01/2024 14:07

I know exactly that feeling! I'm sitting here, dreading tomorrow.

I started a new job about 8 weeks ago. All seemed well at first but then the cracks started to show. The woman who's job I'm supposed to be taking over when she goes off on mat leave is only 24 and has never trained anyone before. There is a bit of a language problem also. Then there's the fact that I learnt after the first week, I was supposed to be learning 2 other jobs also. It's very involved work and each of the jobs is quite different (all admin though). It got so that when I asked for help as I didn't understand/hadn't done/ had forgotten something, I either got told 'in a minute' in a short sharp reply (and then it didn't happen) and latterly, sighs and eye rolls. I feel like a complete nuisance and rather thick - but they have expected me to have an afternoon observing a task and then expected to remember it three weeks later! And, yes, I did take as many notes as I could but there are so many variables i.e. 'you do it like this except when this happens or this or this'. I've been constantly coming up with things I haven't come across. Also I've been told 'you've done that wrong, you do it like this'. I correct it but have said 'oh, I've not seen that before' to be told, in error, 'yes you have, we went through this'!

I'd speak to the line manager about it but she really doesn't care what the minions do, as long as the jobs get done. She will also ball people out in the office if they've done something wrong.

I understand everyone is stressed and has too much work to do but......

I've already pulled sick days (in my probation period - not good) because I'm so stressed about the whole situation. Almost hope they contact me later today and dismiss me but I can't afford it. My mental health has taken a huge hit. Even had nightmares about it all last night.

I've been on Indeed again but I don't know how I'd fit interviews in and how I'd explain my brief time with this company. I have to work or I'll lose my rented house.

Sorry for the tirade op's post struck a cord with me, still in bed, dreading tomorrow.

This all sounds awful, sorry you’re going through this. Hope you can move on to something else soon.
I hope tomorrow isn’t as bad as we are all preparing for. Good luck everyone - at least it’s just 4 days.

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Therealjudgejudy · 01/01/2024 23:27

This is why I decided to work for myself. The Sunday scaries were all too real...