DH not prioritising me after hospital discharge?

[shhhhoctopie]

Will try to keep this brief and non-specific as don't want it to be outing.

I have a planned admission to hospital coming up which will involve getting a feeding tube fitted. I will be in for a few weeks then discharged with the tube in place and I will be doing my own tube feeding from then on. We have no kids but we do have a very excitable puppy which will make tube feeding challenging.

My DH has arranged a medical appointment at a location over 100 miles away (there is a clinic in our local city but apparently the further away one was able to give him a sooner appointment). He knew I was going into hospital when he arranged it but we didn't have an exact date - we did know it would be after Christmas and before the end of January though. His appointment is first thing in the morning so he has to travel down the night before because he doesn't want to be tired for his appointment. It now turns out that I will have a day or so at home before he leaves.

Maybe I'm just too considerate or put other people before myself but I would never consider leaving my DH so soon after coming out of hospital, even more so if he had to deal with something ongoing like tube feeding. I'd feel bad going away even a week after let alone a few days.

AIBU to think that he should prioritise his partner aka me? He could get seen by a clinic locally but apparently he doesn't want to?

Well I live alone so if it was me getting a feeding tube I would just have to get on with it. He won't be away long, I'm sure you will be fine, and you won't be discharged until things are going well.

Feeding tube insertion (even if it is inserted through your abdomen) is not a procedure that generally causes much pain afterwards. You will receive education on how to run feeds and a dietician will give you a plan for timing and rates of feed.
I really wouldn’t worry about needing a carer.

I presume you would feed from a bag, connected to tubes which then connect to your port, so from the bag or bottle.

If this is similar to your situation, then if you purchase your self some S hooks ( online sellers) you may be able to do your feed in your kitchen with your bag or bottle on lower end of the hook and the top of the hook hanging from a kitchen cupboard door handle.

There are usually holes in the bags or bottles for patients feeds in hospitals, which are placed on drip stands. So the S hooks should be ideal. Providing it's above you head so you may want to sit down.

Now the moment the puppy is full of themselves and being a captain bugggger-nuts, jumping up, just stamp your foot once, on the floor they usually should stop right away. Then when the pup behaves speak nicely to them so the pup learns how to behave, especially to keep your tubing free from paws, this should repeat every time the pup forgets and the cycle continues. You'll be the boss! Alpha female and the puppy has to learn their place, it's pack leadership.

So for your feeds, use S hooks and stamp your foots every time the puppy jumps up.

Hope this helps, and remember you got this.

feet

If he is the type toprioritise his own health appt but also try to make up for it in other ways (e.g. have things nice for me at home when you returned from hospital, organise dog care for the night he's away) than YABU
But my sense from your tone is that he isn't, and that you were hoping that for once he'd step up.. but once again managed to find a way not to.
If this is the case, then chances are he will only get more selfish set in his ways as he ages.
With apologies if I have misread your tone.

He should absolutely reschedule!

Your medical procedures sound complex and I am assuming you will need help with more than just the puppy.

why is he making this all about him?

He needs to step up and stop being selfish.