My neighbour is the cheekiest fcker

thisisasurvivor · 2023-12-29T16:59:24+00:00

Like I have no words now Backstory For years he helped us and went over and beyond on my farm Like times when he wasn't even asked Now he is taking the mick We wanted to repay his kindness and he purchased land for us for way less than it was valued for This felt right and I have no regrets Now He has moved his horses onto our land Is using our water each day And seems to have taken over two sheds also (with the hay he is now claiming as is ) Problem is my siblings and I are on the spectrum so we often don't recognise that we are being taken advantage off I got him a small Xmas gift and he didn't even bother write a card after all he has been given I'm thinking of a) flipping out and telling him just how wrong he is Or b) Trip to the solicitor next week to try to draw up some agreement Ie use the shed at x price per month? Gosh I have no clue what the best option is

Original poster

thisisasurvivor · 29/12/2023 17:00

Purchased land from us

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mottytotty · 29/12/2023 17:01

YANBU. You need to act fast.

Tell him to move asap or you will call the police.

See a solicitor and get their view.

Lighrbulbmo · 29/12/2023 17:02

Solicitor asap do not delay.

Sunflower8848 · 29/12/2023 17:02

I would just have a calm adult conversation, explain your situation and see what he says back. Going in guns blazing won’t help the situation one bit.

Notimeforaname · 29/12/2023 17:03

Put it in writing to him that he has to stop using your land and water.
And as above, see a solicitor in the meantime.

Spirallingdownwards · 29/12/2023 17:04

Sorry neighbour but the shed etc are on our land not the land you bought from us. You will need to make your own arrangements fkr your horses on your land

Original poster

thisisasurvivor · 29/12/2023 17:05

See I don't want to piss him off

I have relied on him in many ways
But I always paid him
And very well

Now it's like let's just take the total piss !!!!!!!

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Cherrysoup · 29/12/2023 17:06

Have you told him to move the horses? Is there a way to cut off the water so he has to move them? You can leave a notice saying that he is fly grazing and that the horses will be removed by a certain date. Contact your neighbourhood police team to ask about them being removed to a green yard, unless someone else can tell you how to organise this. Using the hay is theft: can you lock it up/move it?

Original poster

thisisasurvivor · 29/12/2023 17:06

Three animals in the shed he wants to buy from us

It's been a year and no money
I keep telling him i have requested a lorry to take them to mart

No fcking response

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Cherrysoup · 29/12/2023 17:06

thisisasurvivor · 29/12/2023 17:05

See I don't want to piss him off

I have relied on him in many ways
But I always paid him
And very well

Now it's like let's just take the total piss !!!!!!!

Why not? It’s not his land, he has no rights to fly graze it.

Original poster

thisisasurvivor · 29/12/2023 17:07

Cherrysoup · 29/12/2023 17:06

Have you told him to move the horses? Is there a way to cut off the water so he has to move them? You can leave a notice saying that he is fly grazing and that the horses will be removed by a certain date. Contact your neighbourhood police team to ask about them being removed to a green yard, unless someone else can tell you how to organise this. Using the hay is theft: can you lock it up/move it?

This is the wise thing to do xxx

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Cherrysoup · 29/12/2023 17:08

thisisasurvivor · 29/12/2023 17:07

This is the wise thing to do xxx

Show quote history

So do it. Give him a time limit (short one). As he bought land from you, he has somewhere to put them. Be hard!

DragonMama3 · 29/12/2023 17:13

thisisasurvivor · 29/12/2023 17:06

Three animals in the shed he wants to buy from us

It's been a year and no money
I keep telling him i have requested a lorry to take them to mart

No fcking response

Hire a lorry from elsewhere.

GoingDownLikeBHS · 29/12/2023 17:21

So he said he would buy the land and didn't pay you?

If you sold him the land cheaply then that's it, you've sold it. Whatever happened in the past you'll have to leave in the past. Obviously he shouldn't be taking advantage now so deal with the situation you have to hand, not with favours done in the past.

FatFemale · 29/12/2023 17:31

So hes not bought the land yet?

mrsbyers · 29/12/2023 18:08

Has he paid for the land ?

Teenagehorrorbag · 29/12/2023 18:12

If you're ND you may not be handling this well. And of course it's hard to raise difficult issues if you've always got on in the past. But you do need to establish clear boundaries and the sooner the better. Put it in writing if that's easier?

You need to tell him that you don't want his horses on your land or in your shed, and he needs to move them asap. You also need to state that the hay is yours (why does he claim otherwise) and he is not to use it. Unless of course you'd be happy to sell him hay at x rate, and rent him the field/shed at y rate, in which case you suggest getting a proper legal agreement drawn up.

But given the fact that he's already massively taking advantage, I'd be inclined to stop making any arrangements with him - he's clearly taking a mile for every inch you offer.....!!

Original poster

thisisasurvivor · 29/12/2023 18:40

mrsbyers · 29/12/2023 18:08

Has he paid for the land ?

Yes he paid for one field yes

The rest is still ours

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Original poster

thisisasurvivor · 29/12/2023 18:48

No def not handling it well

Plus there is a feeling of
Well he was nice to us for some time so is this really that bad??

I think he is shit and a solicitor is the best option

Lay it out in black and white
Thing is we don't even have any money and are not money driven in any way and he has totally gone to town on that

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FatFemale · 30/12/2023 10:27

So hes paid for one field. He sticks to that field. Nothing else. Have a word. If he continues, make a diary of his cheeky fuckery and get legal advice. A solicitors letter might be whats needed here

Teenagehorrorbag · 30/12/2023 14:00

I wonder if he's trying to intimidate you into selling him more land cheaply? If he tries to tell you he has 'squatters rights', or adverse possession because he's been using the land unchallenged, don't fall for it! (That takes 12 years sole use...).

But the sooner you do challenge him, the better. I would write him a letter now telling him to stop or you will involve your lawyers. And if you do have to get legal advice, a lot of firms offer one hour free initial consultation, which might be all you need.

It is a shame to fall out with previously nice neighbours - but perhaps he was only ever 'nice' because he wanted things from you? Time to draw a line now. Good luck!

Original poster

thisisasurvivor · 30/12/2023 22:28

Teenagehorrorbag · 30/12/2023 14:00

I wonder if he's trying to intimidate you into selling him more land cheaply? If he tries to tell you he has 'squatters rights', or adverse possession because he's been using the land unchallenged, don't fall for it! (That takes 12 years sole use...).

But the sooner you do challenge him, the better. I would write him a letter now telling him to stop or you will involve your lawyers. And if you do have to get legal advice, a lot of firms offer one hour free initial consultation, which might be all you need.

It is a shame to fall out with previously nice neighbours - but perhaps he was only ever 'nice' because he wanted things from you? Time to draw a line now. Good luck!

This I think has hit the nail on the head

It feels awful

We very much valued his help for decades

So he got land and it cost him around 30k less than he should have paid
Was the right thing to do

But now !!

Ffs
I do not want a fight

I want to put it all in writing
We are real softies and honestly don't even know what he should have been paying for shed use etc !!!

Very silly 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

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