Your kids in the morning

[Thatweirdbitbeforenewyear]

What does it look like, the morning routine?

Our Dd is 5,5 and very wilful & independent
We previously had a baby gate at the top of the stairs and when she woke she would read, play quietly on her tablet etc until I or Dh got up with her and went downstairs with her and made breakfast etc
A while ago she learnt to unlock the gate (it did seem she was getting too old to have a gate) of course, she’d be off downstairs and I said she has to wait for us etc. She wakes quite early now and gets bored waiting. Do you let your dc go downstairs alone? If so, at what age? She tends to play quietly or watch tv, she sometimes gets her own breakfast or waits
I can remember doing the same with my older brother when we were kids and my parents were still asleep upstairs with my baby sister
Is this ok or a no no 😬
What are your mornings like?

Mine are 3&6. I (reluctantly) get up when my kids get up. My children are naturally early risers - I am not. If I am super tired and it is super early (pre 6am) I have on occasion sent them back to bed or told them they have to read a book/tidy their bedroom/pair the odd socks before they come back into my room to wake me up again.

I would let a 5.5 year old get up with out me and put the TV on whatever. At 5.5 if they get breakfast though I've always told mine to bring it into my room to eat so I am there. I am a light sleep so usually I am awake but dozing as them coming out of their rooms wakes me.

It's fine OP. Mine have been doing it since aged 4. As long as they aren't trying to go out our use appliances other than the TV. What do you think will happen?

Depends on the child and the house, but generally I think this is fine.

Mine are 7&5 They've been getting up & going downstairs together for the best part of 18months or so. They usually come in & say good morning & they get reminded to use the loo / put their glasses on etc. They then go downstairs, the TV goes on & they make breakfast (usually toast or some form of packaged bakery item - waffles, brioche). This usually only really applies on weekends or in school holidays when I work late/night shifts & DP leaves for work before they get up. They're reasonably sensible & we make sure to leave anything they shouldn't have out of sight/reach anyway.

Ds always came through to us when he woke, and either snuggle in with us and chat or one of us would get up with him (usually dh).

As he got older and slept later, dh was usually up before him so it was never an issue.

I've never been comfortable with the idea of dc being left to get on with it alone in the mornings because we couldnt be bothered to get up with them - not because of safety, but because it just felt strange way to start their morning, left alone with noone to chat to . If we wanted more sleep the obvious answer was either have an early night, or take turns at lie ins.

I wouldn't be happy with dcs being downstairs on their own while I was sleeping. They do go into other rooms during the day while I'm awake, but then I can listen out for them. I think my dcs would get lonely on their own and wouldn't want to be up for an hour before I got up. Generally they get up at 7am when we go in and wake them. If they wake earlier (rare) they come into our bed for a cuddle.

My 5 year old will wake up around 6.45 usually. She takes herself to the loo which wakes me up so she'll always shout a "Good Morning Mummy" at me.

Depending on the day and time I'd be happy for her to crack on and play or watch TV while I continue to catch up on a little sleep but we only have a small flat so she's only really a couple of metres away from me anyway.

She wouldn't help herself to any food or drink though so she'd wake me up if she wanted breakfast or whatever.

Really stupid question alert, other people's 5 year olds seem to be getting their own drinks of water and breakfast and stuff. How are they all reaching everything they need?

Why can't children be downstairs alone? What on earth would happen that wouldn't happen in normal day time?

5 year old here. Weekends she can go down and watch tv, weekdays we set up table activities like a workbook, colouring, drawing, paper etc.

She doesn't get breakfast unsupervised due to choking risks and I'm probably a bit OTT on this but I dont leave cables/wires/strangling risk toys around.

Unlike a previous poster, I dont think it's about being lazy (we normally get up shortly after and indulge in peaceful showers!) Its about giving them the opportunity to grow into their independence. If they want to do it and you feel they are safe and ready, I dint see the sense in holding them back. I dont think that teaches them that we trust them.

@CarrotCake01 - my 3.5 year old can reach most basic foods in our kitchen. Just pushes Tripp trapp toddler chair to counter to reach fruit bowl or fridge. And he has low down snack drawer and cereal is kept low.
So he can easily reach fridge to get milk (in beaker already, it’s hot where we live so it can’t stay out very long), get some dried cherrios or a biscuit or banana.

Regardless, yes I have left him downstairs since he turned 3 alone. I don’t stay in bed, but if he wakes at 6.30am I bring him down, give drink and tv on. And leave him watching tv or playing with toys whilst I go back upstairs and have shower and get dressed. He would just run back down anyway if I made him stay in his room.

@CarrotCake01 - we use the Tripp trapp toddler chair, but Ds just uses it at sink/ counter/ fridge like this. It’s really lightweight so he just pushes it wherever he need a ladder to reach.

https://learningtowers.co.uk/products/the-thin-air-height-adjustable-folding-tower

We've never done this. Ours always have to stay in their room until a set time. 0700 is the earliest has ever been, when they were little, or now in school

In the hols now it is 0800. My oldest are 10 and 11 and starting to laze in bed, my youngest is 8 with sen and wouldn't want to go down by himself.

For me it isn't the go downstairs time, it is the time that people start to disturb others

We don't watch TV in the morning, so I guess that is why there is no draw to go down

The one time I let mine go downstairs by herself I found her watching the news at the height of the invasion of Ukraine. That was not good.

Usual work days I'm up before her anyway, weekends and holidays I take it in turns with DH to get up but no earlier that 6.45am. DD is told to play silently or look at books in her room on the days she's up before her gro clock. She'd get up early to watch TV if she was given half a chance, so we have to make it as boring as possible to encourage her to stay in bed.

DS is 5. He is allowed to get up at 6. One of us will take him downstairs and get him toys/TV/cereal then we go back to bed until 7.

Yeah course it's fine for half hour or so

Jeepers! Mine would be scaling the curtains and trying to climb onto the dining table!

Mine are just turned 5 and 7 and have been heading downstairs on their own or together for the past year or so. They are allowed up once their clocks wake up at 6.30. One of us will get up by 7.30 in order to feed the dog and the kids will come get us for any issues! It's been a game changer!

Mine are 6 and 3 and wake at about 5am. They have to play in their room until 6am on a weekday, 7am on a weekend. Then they tidy their room and we go down together. I don't let them go down without me because I want to see the living room tidy when I first come down. If you are letting yours down, make sure the key to the front door is hidden! I wouldn't personally as anything mine have ever gotten into have done it when I've been on a different floor level to them.

Little one is 6yo, she shouts "can I get up now please mummy?" and I go in and either turn her light on and say good morning or tell her it's too early and to rest some more. Then she'll either watch telly, read or draw downstairs whilst I sort out the pets and then I'll get her breakfast and she'll get dressed.
Big one is 12yo and he gets up when he wakes up, usually puts his computer on and then dashes downstairs looking apologetic when I remind him he's supposed to have a drink first!!

You're not asleep though @Pinkyyogapanties - fine to be getting ready but you're presumably checking on the 2YO even if it's just listening out. My worry would be child downstairs when parent is asleep or dozes off.

Yes - I’m awake . I am listening to him and his feet!!!!
I hadn’t ever really thought of it like this before but he is definitely independent! I’ll give him that .

Im back at work in March - he will be at nursery full time ( he currently does 2 days )
There will be no more lazy morning play in the week as we will be out by 7.45am. I hope he will be okay!!!

My ds is 5 next month and often gets up around 5. Recently (since we got a smart tv so he can operate it lol) he's sometimes getting up by himself and chilling on the sofa. We have a flat though so no stairs, and I'm a very light sleeper. We leave a bottle of water and some boxes of breakfast type snacks on the sofa, dry cereal etc so he doesn't have to do anything himself. Other days he'll stay in bed with me and watch his tablet on silent.

Edit - he only lasts until 7am at the latest, when his gro clock owl wakes up. He likes having people to play with!