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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want two overnight guests in a one bedroom flat?

32 replies

cassandracusses · 27/12/2023 10:31

I live in a flat slap bang in the middle of London. Can be at Oxford Circus in 10 minutes on foot.

Live there with dh. Suits us perfectly because we can walk everywhere and we are out working all day!

It’s a tiny flat. Maybe 40 sqm. The only bathroom is through the bedroom. Kitchen and living room are one room. So I guess it’s like a bigger studio really!

We have a blow up mattress for friends who need to stay. Usually after a late concert or a flight etc. One person is fine for one night if they understand the layout.

My parents love visiting London. They come down from Manchester to see shows, museums, exhibitions. When it’s just one of them, it’s ok for them to stay the night. A bit annoying to have to rearrange the living room and then wash and dry sheets.

But now both of them want to stay overnight at the same time. Four people in a 40sqm flat is too cramped. Poor dh says he is fine, but I know he likes his space.

AIBU to say no to having two overnight guests?

OP posts:
BrimfulOfMash · 27/12/2023 10:35

The bathroom through the bedroom makes it very difficult. I always need a wee in the night so couldn’t be the guest in that set up.

Do you ever go away for the weekend? Plan so that they flat sit during your holidays and weekends visiting friends?

OneLollipop · 27/12/2023 10:36

Of course you're not being unreasonable. It's your home and it's tiny. Tell them one at a time is fine but not both together. If they both want to stay they can get a hotel room like everyone else.

AuntieMarys · 27/12/2023 10:54

Premier inn

Tacotortoise · 27/12/2023 11:05

It'd fine to say no but the washing/ drying sheets would take equally as long no matter how large your flat.

martha4clark · 27/12/2023 11:07

If it's one night, I would say yes.

Jellycats4life · 27/12/2023 11:08

Welllll, if you don’t mind one person staying on a blow up mattress, is two really such a stretch?

Or is it that it’s OK when a friend stays but you don’t really enjoy the company of your parents?

BabyYoshke · 27/12/2023 11:08

I mean it’s up to you and I would hate guests in that situation but it’s your parents and it’s only one night. What would their reaction be if you said no?

Gardeningtime · 27/12/2023 11:10

I can’t see how one on a blow up mattress for one night is fine but not two. It’s one night, I’d be ok with it.

melj1213 · 27/12/2023 11:14

Absolutely fine, if a bit of a squeeze for one night but as long as everyone knows that's the situation then it's up to them to accept it or not.

For more than one night, definitely a hotel.

Dotcheck · 27/12/2023 11:18

Both your parents or your friend + - parent?

If it’s both parents I would say yes, but let them have your bedroom. Parent + friend I would say no to friend

marmaladeandpeanutbutter · 27/12/2023 11:22

I think you'd rather put up your friends than your parents.

Beautiful3 · 27/12/2023 11:29

I would for one night, for my parents. But it wouldn't be a regular thing. Just very occasional.

Lampzade · 27/12/2023 11:31

I would manage for one night
I would give the parents the bedroom .

luckylavender · 27/12/2023 11:36

Gardeningtime · 27/12/2023 11:10

I can’t see how one on a blow up mattress for one night is fine but not two. It’s one night, I’d be ok with it.

It's not just about the sleeping though is it? The bathroom is tricky.

oneleggedspider · 27/12/2023 11:44

I'd be worried if you agree to it this time it'll set a precedent. But if they aren't likely to visit again in the next 6 months id probably go along with it for a night.

TimeFlysWhenYoureHavingRum · 27/12/2023 11:47

Yanbu. That's literally what hotels are for!

CharlieCoCo · 27/12/2023 13:46

from your headline i was going to agree as thought would be 2 separent guests, but unless your parents are actually separated then i think its fine for the night, they come as a team and will be sharing the bed. the sheet changing will be the same. the bathroom will be a problem with guests regardless.

Muchof · 27/12/2023 13:59

I had more than one over night guest at a time when I had a one bedroom flat, it was perfectly manageable, but the bathroom was properly separate. The bathroom access would be the reason I might say no to this, but then I would say no to all guests not say one is ok but two isn't.

Olika · 27/12/2023 14:00

Try to get them stay in a hotel

Tinkerbyebye · 27/12/2023 14:02

It’s one night. Give them the bedroom, you do blow up mattress or sofa. Just tell them you may walkthrough to the toilet

tescocreditcard · 27/12/2023 14:04

There's plenty of hotels in London, just put them in one of those for a night. They can see you all day and night, go and sleep in nice hotel and have a cooked breakfast then come back and see you in the day. job done.

Isthisreasonable · 27/12/2023 14:04

Assuming they are more likely to need the loo in the night, give them the bedroom and you crash in the living room. Perfectly OK for the odd night. They know the set up so must be ok with it.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 27/12/2023 14:05

One night and it's your parents? YABU

EmpressaurusOfCats · 27/12/2023 14:07

Tacotortoise · 27/12/2023 11:05

It'd fine to say no but the washing/ drying sheets would take equally as long no matter how large your flat.

Yes, but OP doesn’t say whether she’s got a dryer. If the sheets have to go on airers, having more space does make it easier.

Zombiemum1946 · 27/12/2023 14:10

If its just one night every now and then, just give them the bedroom.

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