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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not have the children during holidays?

19 replies

Doodoodeedoo · 26/12/2023 19:47

This has come up yesterday, I wondered what others thought.

I work two days a week as a teacher, so obviously have holidays off. At the moment our children are not school age so in a private day nursery. Apart from Christmas they stay in during school holidays for two days a week, although they do go in a bit later and get picked up earlier (9-4 ish rather than 8-430.)

Im obviously really lucky to only work two days a week but it’s so nice to have a couple of days a week just for me. I get to meet up with friends, have my hair done and just chill out a bit. AIBU?

OP posts:
Puddingpieplum · 26/12/2023 19:51

You'd have to pay even if they didn't go.
You'll break their routine by not sending them.
Time alone is sanity saving.

lucalucss · 26/12/2023 19:52

Sounds great! I would if I could.

NoKnit · 26/12/2023 19:55

They do sort of need a break from routine though and a holiday it is good for them. As someone who works with children assume you'd know this. Around here (not UK mainland Europe) the Kindergartens do stay open all year but the children do have to have a 'holiday ' period where they don't go for three weeks. It is flexible though the parents can choose when it is to suit they working schedule. Keeping them in nursery all year round is unfair on them I'd say a rest does them good too.

Original poster
Doodoodeedoo · 26/12/2023 19:58

@NoKnit - I suppose I tend to think since they’re only there for two days a week anyway it does give them five days with me.

OP posts:
dulydone · 26/12/2023 19:59

YANBU - it is two days a week, not like they're in every day. One of my DC is in like yours 2.5 days. I finished work early for Christmas hols and like you kept sending him so that I could get stuff done and preserve a little of my sanity. You need to do what works for your family and I'm sure if you felt there were times they'd benefit from or need the rest you'd keep them home

DillyDallyingAllDay · 26/12/2023 20:01

Nope not being unreasonable at all. You need your time and you can afford it, carry on as you are. Doing things for yourself is important and you don't need to feel guilty for having someone else help out with your kids- you wouldn't even dream you were being unreasonable if a grandparent had them while you went out or had your hair done. It take a village and sometimes you have to pay someone to be your village and that's ok!

elfintinsel · 26/12/2023 20:02

I used to use those days to clean, get my hair done, swap their small clothes out for bigger ones, get rid of unwanted/outgrown toys. As well as meet up with childless friends. I was paying anyway.
I usually took them out earlier in the holidays but they still went!

festivepains · 26/12/2023 20:02

Is someone saying you are unreasonable?

Tweedledumdedum · 26/12/2023 20:03

Personally I wouldn't send them. Presumably you are enjoying time off and they would too, and they are so little still if not even at school. I think nursery is fine as a necessity but not if you're around.

Original poster
Doodoodeedoo · 26/12/2023 20:03

Sort of.

We have the option to pay for TTO. I don’t want to do this 🤣

OP posts:
Crooklodge · 26/12/2023 20:11

If you can afford it and it makes your life easier, why not? Fwiw I have never used paid for childcare, that's just what works for us. Well sometimes not...

IgnoranceNotOk · 26/12/2023 20:18

I feel like this when I’ve left mine at nursery (part time teacher too) but then through the guilt try to remind myself of all the SAHMs who send their kids to nursery all year round and I can’t work out why I feel so guilty about it!

Enjoy the break, get your planning done and hopefully a bit of time for yourself.

Now I have one at school I keep DS2 in for the odd days in the holidays so I can have some time just with DS1 (as I’m part time, I do get time every week with DS2).

BrutusMcDogface · 26/12/2023 20:20

You’re very lucky! I’d say that it’s actually crucial to your mental health to have those days to yourself. Your children are only doing two days a week; it’s not like they’re there full time through the hols (which I would probably think was a bit unreasonable).

Crack on! Anyone who says you should have your children in the holidays is probably jealous.

BrutusMcDogface · 26/12/2023 20:21

Plus, the nursery days are numbered. It won’t be long before you have them in school and off in the holidays with you.

Original poster
Doodoodeedoo · 26/12/2023 20:31

BrutusMcDogface · 26/12/2023 20:21

Plus, the nursery days are numbered. It won’t be long before you have them in school and off in the holidays with you.

Edited

Tell me about it! 😱

OP posts:
DrMadelineMaxwell · 26/12/2023 20:34

I personally never sent my kids to childcare in the school holidays while I was off, but other colleagues of mine did.

voxnihili · 26/12/2023 20:47

I never sent DD in during the holidays but she did full time so she needed the break I think. Her nursery was near my school as well and I needed a break from the commute. If your child only does 2 days a week I think it’s fine as they get plenty of down time.

This academic year, me and DD have 4 days of holidays that don’t overlap. DP has taken the days off that she is off but I’m in work but it means I’ve got 4 days to myself. It’s amazing, I never get time to myself!

Phillipa12 · 26/12/2023 21:02

I work term time only and have primary aged dc, I put them in holiday club once a week during holidays. They love it, and I can do all the little jobs that I can't do with dc in tow.

Covidwoes · 26/12/2023 21:20

YANBU OP! I'm a teacher and need at least one day to myself in the holidays, otherwise I'd never have any days without the kids, ever. I don't understand people who say mothers need to be round their kids all the time.

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