Long term mumsnetter, name changed for this post.
I live in a small market town, we can trace our ancestors back to the founders of the town. Locally there is some prestige to be born here rather than the nearest somewhat notorious municipality.
Our home is on the edge of town with the nearest property being a converted stable used as a holiday let. We are on good terms with the owners and hold keys for them as they live at a distance. At the end of last week they messaged to say they had a last minute booking so we agreed to open the gate for their guests to access the property.
I presume the guests arrived late on Friday night as on Saturday morning there were lights on and a donkey hee-haw-ing in the paddock.
I sent my husband round and he reported there was a young couple staying and she seemed to be about 15 months pregnant. My children are long past the baby stage so there wasn't a lot I could do to help out. But I don't want to be unfriendly and I did have a spare cat bed which could pass as a Moses basket. So I took that over along with a cooked chicken big enough to feed a family of four for a week and a massive salad.
Come Sunday night we are woken up by some kind of flash-mob birth announcement. Think blinding lights, shooting stars, white robed gospel singers proclaiming "Joy to the world, our son is born." I really think this is a bit excessive. I admit I don't know this couple's fertility story, and this may well be a life changing event for them, but I really don't think their baby is going to change the world.
Christmas morning when we hoped for a lie in, the well wishers start arriving. Hoards of them, agricultural types with range rovers and 4x4 and even a trailer load of sheep which are now in the paddock adding loud bleating to the donkey hee-haw-ing. The parking and access to our own driveway is a nightmare! (Diagram can be provided once I work out how to upload it on my new phone).
This morning we thought finally the chaos is over. But no, some kid from the local Salvation Army decides to perform a one man marching band down the road followed by a drum solo outside their window. Apparently his mam can't afford to send a gift so he thought they'd enjoy this instead. Whatever happened to sending a casserole?
Right now I am beginning to wonder if we will get to 12th night without a contingent of Middle Eastern dignatories arriving on camels. AIBU to just want some peace and goodwill?