Splitting xmas dinner between both sets of parents

[Pudding20]

I have an older brother and my DH is an only child

Brother hosts for in laws every year and extends the offer to our parents and us.

We decline as wouldnt feel right him cooking for my in laws or them being alone whilst we was together.

We went to my parents this year with a view to host for in laws next year leaving my parents alone, my mum suggested we all go out so no ones alone, DH has said not a chance as his parents have been alone and not fair my parents wont be alone. With potential for the inlaws to be alone the following year.

Our house isnt big enough to have both sets of parents and my brother wont just host for our side of the family.

Im feeling guilty already for next year that i dont want my parents alone even though inlaws have done it this year

My parents used to host for us and in laws but as FIL falls asleep and they have never reciprocated, my mum refuses to do it anymore.

Any advice??!

So why don't you step up and do half the amount of cooking so that you cover it for yourself and in laws?

I make the starter and dessert when we go to my parents

Why not let your parent go to your brothers every year, but host them for brunch drinks/nibbles beforehand? Then you can have your in-laws, and no-one is alone, but you’ve also had a chance to meet up

Your DH is being ridiculous. Take up your BIL's kind offer.

Who ever we arent eating with they come in the morning to see grandchild

Im feeling guilty already for next year that i dont want my parents alone

Are they bothered? Have you asked them?

Why do people have such angst about an adult couple spending Christmas as a couple? They're not alone. They're together. Alone means one person on their own.

My advice would be to accept your brother's kind offer to cook for your in laws and to explore with him, your DH and in laws how you can make the day work for you all including making your brother's day a little easier in exchange for hosting them.