To say my children are ungrateful arses?

[Sometimesrational]

I've spent weeks trying to make everything great for my 4 son's Christmas. Buying and wrapping presents, decorating the house, buying and preparing food.
Tonight, i apparently used the wrong tone of voice when I was asked a really daft question and got a load verbal back from the oldest. Tbh, they talk to me like shit a lot of the time and I feel like not bothering next year and just let them get on with it.
I've done my best with them but they all have this sense of always being right. Maybe they get that from me. What pisses me off though more than that is they let me go off to bed, knowing I feel shit and they stay up and carry on partying.
So my Christmas day ends on a horrible note, while they're all having a whale of a time!
You are being unreasonable - they don't owe you gratitude.
You are not being unreasonable - they sound like a bunch of ingrates.

26 no way. It is not like a teenager sulking. I will stop making an effort.

26? Boot him out

I thought you were going to say 13 or a similar age. To be honest I don't know of anyone that has kids who would speak to their parents like that , yes an argument about a specific situation of course.

But general sneery rudeness which this sounds like from all sons is really sad and unpleasant. Are they otherwise decent people with how they treat partners and live their lives?

Am I the only one who noticed "wrong tone of voice?" Notice she didn't elaborate on that or mention apologizing to them. I interpreted that as she spoke rudely to her DC and she got called out on it. If I was being bitchy I really hope mine would let me know. I am bitchy sometimes and my DC won't say anything and I hate that because I'm worried they might let someone else treat them badly and never do anything about it. So I always apologize heavily/immediately and work hard to speak nicely. It's hard when I'm stressed and full of anxiety. But kids aren't doormats or punching bags. They should be taught to have healthy boundaries which includes not taking verbal abuse of any kind. Apologies are not that hard. You should demonstrate the way you want your kids to act. Both sides apologizing was probably the best outcome. So being passive aggressive and going to bed without resolving the issue is 100% your fault. You could have resolved it and stayed up partying with them. What are you teaching them by acting this way? How will your DC ever learn how to resolve conflict if you don't demonstrate it for them?

Ok I assumed they were children 🙄

Tbh if I ever spoke like that to my mum or dad I’d of been asked to leave - but to be honest it just wouldn’t happen, I don’t think I could ever be purposefully mean or nasty to someone, especially a parent on Christmas Day.

I'd say I was snappy rather than bitchy but one person's snappy....
Anyway, we have all apologised to each other and hopefully won't be speaking to each other like that again.