'D'P tries to ruin every occasion..

[anothername321]

Christmas Eve and I'm in the bath crying.

I'd planned games, matching pjs.. a happy family night. I know it was too good to be true. My family said they would only come if we didn't argue and he's started already.

He was doing tea and I just said I was stressed. I am. Both kids over excited. House with so much to do. It wasn't a dig just a passing comment.

He then says I've been trying to do tea for half a fucking hour and I can't cos I've been helping you.

My parents arrive and I say please don't do this don't argue in front of them again and he carries it on.

I can't even tell you what it is I've apparently done.. apparently I'm a gaslighter!

I left his last Christmas and it was one of the happiest ones in years. I only came back as we had no where else to go.

Just looking for.. a hand hold maybe

So this is ongoing arguments or just recent. You left last year? With dc? Why do you think he acts like that? Does he resent something that he thinks you’ve done?

Hand hold here. What a horrible situation for you

Are your family still there? Any chance you can stay with them tonight?

You know you need to get back to that happier time you were in without him. When you get chance, call women's aid for some advice

Where did you go to last year? Your mum's?

What's the situation with your house? Do you rent or have a mortgage? Whose name is it in?

Find somewhere else to go. Seriously, you’re condemning your children to memories of hideous, stressful Christmases and miserable childhoods. Your parents know what he’s like, can they help? I’m sure they’d do anything they could to get you away from the tosser.

Some men can really be cunts for Christmas (and at other times too). Have a hand hold from me

I think everyone wants a magical stress free Christmas and I’ve never had one yet. I’d like to think they exist but I think they’re like unicorns!!!

You don't have to live like this OP. Hand hold right here.

I hate to say it, but your parents have a clear view of the situation. They know he is horrible to you. That is why they said what they said. Took me years to realise the same thing. Christ, I even remember hiding in the bath crying. You don't have to do anything right now, but have a good think about a long term plan.

Having been in a relationship with someone like the OP’s partner, I can tell you with confidence that he acts like that as a means of maintaining sadistic control over the OP, isolating her from her family, and making sure she never feels comfortable or secure.

OP, you need to get away from this man. Going anywhere away from him, with your kids, would be preferable to staying with him. He will make your life and your kids’ lives a misery.

Bless you I’ve been there. Many years ago with an ex we took a trip to celebrate something important to me. He totally ruined it, tried to argue all the time, shat on anything I enjoyed and was just generally sour faced all the time. I remember having a cry in the bath when we got home. I actually remember that more clearly than the trip.
He is an ex for a reason, and I’m happier now.

Am I missing something,he is making tea or trying to but you keep asking for his help well that's how I read it. Anyhow sorry but there's a problem with you both if your known for arguing regardless of it being Christmas so grow up and sort it and stop spoiling it for everyone else

If you’re having to tell your partner not to argue in front of your parents AGAIN then what an earth are you two doing in a relationship and why haven’t your parents called you out on leaving your kids in this environment?

How are things @anothername321