How to help relative with work situation

[Idontwannabeastupidgirl1]

A close relative in her late 20s. She has a mild cognitive impairment and has always struggled academically and work-wise.
She failed most GCSEs and dropped out of uni after a year, I think she received a diploma of some sort rather than a degree. It's in fine art if I remember correctly.
She has been working in retail for the last 5 years and feels depressed she doesn't have a 'career', as such. I've been trying for a while to help her apply for jobs, her main passion is art or something creative but unfortunately it doesn't seem that easy to find a role there.
She lives in a flat share and to be honest has zero debt and a good amount of savings so she has done well with her money.
I work in a government role and there are an abundance of entry level positions going here, I would help her apply but she's not interested.
I know people will say that it's up to her to fix things, and it's not my business but she tells me a lot she's depressed over it, she compares herself to others a lot. She would like to go back to study and gain a qualification. The problem is she won't consider other career paths, because she could definitely get something that is more of a career, it just may not be in the arts/creative field. I'm just not sure what else to advise, I just know she's really down and feels lost.
She's had therapy but says it was useless

It sounds to me like she likes to complain, but doesn’t actually want to put the work in to change. And that’s ok. I’d steer the conversation away from it in the future.

I don't think there's anything wrong with working in retail, she does enjoy it but I can understand it doesn't pay as well as other jobs might. Maybe that's it though, it's just a case of wanting to complain. Sometimes I think you can't have everything with jobs..

Leave her to it. She makes the effort or she doesn't. There are plenty of people that will.

Could she fill her artistic need by starting a simple online business or doing some evening classes or joining a local painting/ photography group. Sometimes just having a creative outlet makes the day job less important. Merely a way to earn enough to survive. Lots of artists do that.

Yes that's a good idea, thanks I'll suggest it.

I can understand why you want to help her. And it feels kind to give some space and time. Maybe she could take an evening class in some aspect of creativity that she really enjoyed/ would like to learn. At the same time many people develop a side job in creative pursuits - if she's particularly arty she may get be able to sell stuff she makes.

If she wants a full time career in the arts she needs probably to gain some experience by volunteering alongside her paid work. I guess that might not be easy if she works shifts so helping her navigate that could be a way through

As she's under 30 the princes trust could be really helpful with courses/ mentoring etc https://www.princes-trust.org.uk/how-we-can-help

She should try a creative apprenticeship

https://www.apprenticeships.gov.uk/apprentices/browse-apprenticeships/creative-and-design/bs1%201ad/40

Alternatively she could swap her retail work for art gallery or craft based work

I'd leave her to it, you can't do the work for her and it seems she's not motivated to do so.

It's hard to step back when you can see the answer is quite "easy" - but people won't buy into it if they're not in the right place in their own heads to fix it. At the moment you are putting in more energy than she is, aren't you.

When she is a bit more motivated, I'd also recommend the princes trust if she is under 30, a couple of friends' children have had great success with them.

You’ve offered a number of positive productive suggestions. She is obviously not interested. You’ve done all you can.

Her cognitive impairment seems to block logical or analytical thinking or self-reflection - it looks as though she’s using “art” as an elaborate excuse not to engage (saying therapy was useless is a remarkably unintelligent thing to say).

I suppose you could encourage her to look at ways she could use her “creative” talents but it doesn’t sound as though she has any idea of the utter graft that making a living by one’s creative abilities takes. If she’s talented enough, which is a big IF. You have to be more than moderately talented to make a career in the creative industries, believe me.

She might learn by failing but it doesn’t sound as though she’s ever learnt that lesson.

Working in the creative industries is not a kind of harbour for the not very bright - quite the reverse (I train people for one area of the cultural industries).

The kindest encouragement would be for her to do a day job that pays the bills, and for her to pursue art and develop her creativity as a hobby. She can do it as a serious hobby - many people are amateurs in the true sense of the word - pursuing an art for the love of it.

Retail is a career with lots of areas. She could progress up to management but from your description it doesn't sound like that would suit her. She should look at visual merchandising- it's paid a bit better and is much more creative. Some brands let their VM design the windows and floor displays whilst others are more prescriptive. I know someone who has been a VM for many years, loves their job and has even done some stints abroad as part of their job.

Sorry to sound harsh, OP, but I speak as someone with a daughter with an art degree and postgrad, so I understand to some extent.

Your relative doesn't really sound very motivated. It's hard finding paid work (never mind regular paid work, let alone a 'career') in the creative arts, and frankly unless you are very, very determined, focused and committed you don't stand a chance.*

She has left school without much evidence of achievement and then dropped out of university. I think the first step is to ask her to really think about her motivation and preparedness to put in some hard graft. Then she needs to think realistically about jobs - not dream up some fantasy job which doesn't exist! Look at job ads to see what the real possibilities are: art therapy, art technician in a school (very, very sought-after by artists because these jobs supply a basic income but allow time for their own work), etc etc.

So it's got to be down to them. You can only point them in the direction of information, links, ads etc. As an adult, if they want something they've got to get up, and go after it. It's one of the most difficult fields to find work in and if you snooze, you'll loose.

Good luck!

*unless you happen to 'know someone'. Nepotism etc is rife, annoyingly, as in all highly desirable careers such as publishing.

Jobs in arts are extremely competitive, high pressure and actually aren't very well paid. Most art jobs are barely above minimum wage. I am an art graduate myself.
I have a small business doing some art and design work but I do have a daytime job in the NHS which I absolutely love (did Masters for that).
Having both creativity and professional career in my life is transformative.
Having said that, she needs to have high levels of motivation to accomplish her goals. This doesn't appear to be the case so I don't think there is anything you can do to help.

She sounds like the type who likes to moan, and likes to have the concern and sympathy of people around her. But has zero interest in fixing the root of the problem BECAUSE she likes the attention of the sympathetic ears.

I had a good friend very like this. But unfortunately, the sympathetic ears eventually get bored and irritated (which you are heading towards, based on the fact you made this post) and then drift away and/or stop engaging. And actually, as soon as the source of sympathy dried up, she miraculously managed to sort out the issues and move on with her life!

Next time the moaning starts, reply with variations of "that sounds frustrating, what are you going to do about it?"

I think your cousin could enjoy jewellery making.
She is good at retail and that is her day job but she could do a jewellery making class and set up a business and attend markets and sell online.

An artistic hobby for a day a week and selling her craft will give her an outlet to meet artistic people.