To Question things after?

[Sheilaswheelz]

Hi, a few weeks ago I asked my husband to leave. I was tired of him going out all the time and not helping me with the kids and around the house. After a few weeks he told me that he fancied somebody at work and it really bothered me, to the point where I have started questioning if I did the right thing. He has stayed over the odd night and it has been really nice, kids have adjusted really well etc. I really do think we could work on things as we do get on, I am just worried that things will slip back to how they was and the only reason I am doing this is because I dont want somebody else to have him. He told me he only said this to get at me but it still plays on my mind. Another thing that bothers me is that he is extremely sexual, I cant bend over without him smacking my bum or walk past him without a cuddle and it is draining, I do love him, he has asked me to come over tonight but I really dont want to go because he will pester me for sex, I just feel he cant keep his hands off me which maybe some women would absolutely love, but I loathe it.

There is no other woman, he used that to get at you and it worked. Once you split up and you gain control over your own body and space again, you can work on building up your self confidence. Eventually, there may well be another woman in his life, but she'll end up going through what you're going through now and you need to remember that that's sad for her and not something for you to be jealous of.

No one is entitled to touch your body! It doesn't matter if you're married to this loser or not. He's sexually harassing and assaulting you! Bin him!

NOPE

Which is how he wanted you to feel. He told you (or made it up) so you would let him back in again. But you want to actively avoid walking past this man.

That's not a marriage. It's not a partnership.

Its really bad, he literally has a constant erection, I cannot keep up with it. He plays with the kids really well but they do not miss him when he isnt here, they never ask for him. It just isnt how I thought it would be, I wanted a solid family unit for my children. My SIL said that she would be very happy for her kids to have a father like H as although he isnt perfect, he isnt out meeting other women, doing drugs etc. Is the bar really that low that I should just put up with it?

I also dont think putting ONE set of clothes in a bag outside was unreasonable and nasty? maybe I am wrong though?

I wouldn't listen to anything his family say to you to be honest. None of them sound reasonable.
Presumably he doesn't harass SIL so she doesn't have all the information. Neither does his mum or anyone else who is telling you you're in the wrong.

Listen to yourself. You know you did the right thing.

There are lots of threads on here from women living with sex pests, and every single one of them, without exception, hates it.

Look. Stop it. He treats you like dirt. You can’t stand him. All of us here understand why you can’t stand him. He’s horrible and a twat, his mother and sister are also twats. Stop listening to them.

As a PP said, stop being a wet lettuce. You keep on with this “why do I feel jealous” stuff. It isn’t because he’s good for you and it was a great relationship. It’s because you’re grieving for the great relationship that you never had. It’s because he might be starting a new relationship and you don’t have one. Taking him back won’t make you feel better.