Hypothetical commitment situations

[Mermaidsgalore]

If you asked your partner about marriage and they said no for whatever reason, how many more years would you wait?
If you are aged approx 31-34 and your partner won't commit to a timeline for children, would you wait it out any longer?
If you suggested a cheap, basic registry office do and they said no, what would you do?
Basically, how long would you stay in a relationship that had an undefined future? Assuming you aren't very young e.g. 19.

I’d question why you want to get married, what difference will it make?

What if you want the commitment of marriage/having a family?

Eh?
If you want a 'defined future' and aren't being given it. Dump immediately. What are you waiting for?

Run, run, run like the wind

Aged 31-34 I would definitely want to make sure we were on the same page / timeline for kids and I wouldn’t stick it out if we had been together a decent length of time and they were still on the fence

It's just my sister is in a similar situation currently and I feel sorry for her.. she's not happy and feels in limbo.

Sometimes things aren't meant to be OP.
If you want marriage+family but your current partner is unwilling to commit. There's no point in wasting time continuing to wait. If someone was on the same page and wanted the same things they'd marry you already.

By waiting you're just throwing away your chance of finding someone who DOES want to marry you. Sunk cost fallacy...

Our brother told her to just see how things go and that it might naturally develop, but I think in your 30s that's quite risky tbh.

I would be leaving. She still has time to meet somebody who will commit to marriage and children. I wouldn't be prepared to stretch my body out of shape for a man who wouldn't marry me. If this man loved her and wanted a family, and given her age, he'd marry her and agree about a time line for children. I think that by late twenties you should be planning ahead and only going out with possible men rather than wasting your time with lost causes. By the way, if she stays tills her eggs are too ancient, there are many cases of those men just skipping off and marrying and starting a family with somebody younger in very short order.

She should leave. Her partner does not want to marry her.

It depends on what the actual conversation is.

I think I said to DH that I wanted kids and wouldn’t have them outside of marriage in the first few weeks of dating.

He was fine and wasn’t fussed about marriage, wanted kids and was happy to get married if partner wanted it. But obviously not immediately.

We got married after 6 years after a conversation when we decided we were both ready.

If your sister’s partner is reluctant after significant time together she won’t get what she wants with him.

DH and I knew we’d get married after a year but we prioritised a house purchase.

I'd say its not down to you, its down to your sister... is she happy to wait and see how things go.

when we enter into a relationship, we don't go in on day one thinking i'm gonna marry this guy and have his babies.. thats what being in a relationship is about, its about working out what each other wants. whats a must have and whats a maybe.

At that age I'd wait 2 minutes and he'd be gone.

Younger than that, I'd give them 3 years max and then they'd have to piss or get off the pot.

I wouldn’t wait any longer for children. I wouldn’t want to run any risk of losing my chance for a family because some man didn’t feel ready.

Unless she really wants to wait then it's best to end the relationship.
It doesn't sound like he's been leading her on as he's always said no from the start.

Her want in getting married doesn't out weigh his in not wanting to get married.

Just not compatible and want different things in life.