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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I being stupid?

4 replies

Firegirl13 · 20/12/2023 00:48

I’ve been with my partner nearly 9 years. Met online and things moved v quickly. 6 kids between us (3 him 3 me)
Always found things difficult with the way we parent. We are very different in this respect. But always talked things through and come to understanding each others approach.
we own a business together (4 years now)
Recently thing have been difficult, for lots of different/difficult reasons.
We decided that living apart for a while would be the best thing for the children and ourselves.

I moved out with my children, set up on my own, (less than 1 mile where we lived together) we share the same friend group, still work together (obviously as it’s our business).
Our mutual friends are finding it difficult as he’s making it out like they have to choose me or him!

Im starting to feel isolated as our friends live on the same street as him, I’m a 5 minute drive away (not walkable as no footpath and a very busy road. 60mph road)
Ive explained how I feel to my partner, and our friends, and they say they understand, but I just can’t help but feel pushed out a little! I know our friends or he are not doing it on purpose, but as he lives closer, it’s easier to spend time with him rather than me. part of me completely understands this but I still feel a little resentment towards the whole situation!

How do I push through and stop thinking I’ve done something wrong? I do suffer with anxiety but I think this whole situation is making it much worse!

OP posts:
Trez1510 · 20/12/2023 09:15

Are you still partners in life as well as business partners? The entire 'him or me' situation indicates you are now only partners in business in his view.

Jf20 · 20/12/2023 09:40

I’m not sure what you’re looking for. Do you want them to not see him without you? To be invited each time? Do you reach out to them and invite them to meet?

Jf20 · 20/12/2023 09:41

I’m also confused as to why you call him your partner, when it doesn’t appear you are any more?

ManateeFair · 20/12/2023 10:47

I don't understand. Are you a couple or not? You say you're living apart 'for a while' but it sounds to me like you've just split up. If you were still a couple you'd be socialising together even if you weren't living together.

Clearly your friends think you've split up for good, and I suspect your (ex?)partner does too.

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