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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU or is this weird behaviour?

16 replies

Moreorlessmentallystable · 19/12/2023 16:46

We have a small circle of friends and a big family ,sometimes we do events where we mix both. Everyone has a good time, and they all seem to get along. We live in a small town so when by chance one of my family members has seen our friends about in town she makes conversation but then she has asked for a few of our friends phone numbers to "stay in touch", is this normal behaviour? My friends have found it a bit weird but went along with it as they didn't want to be rude. Also nearly every time I post some activity I have done with my friends on Facebook she comments on how we need to all do that together soon...is this weird or am I reading too much I to it? For context this person has a good enough circle and does activities with her friends often (to which I am never invited) so it's definitely not out of loneliness...

OP posts:
Sexlivesofthepotatomen · 19/12/2023 16:47

If you're all attending events together then they obviously know each other, I don't really see the harm.

huggyduggy54 · 19/12/2023 16:52

So they know each other so just seems like the family member is being friendly and sociable. It's kind of sad when someone being friendly is perceived as being weird- sounds like the friends are being clicky.

KrisAkabusi · 19/12/2023 16:56

I can't see anything wrong with this. People that get on want to keep in touch? Shocker!

MyLadyTheKingsMother · 19/12/2023 16:58

She's just making friends. It's very normal. You are the odd one!

VisionsOfSplendour · 19/12/2023 16:59

I think it's a bit odd, I wouldn't want to give my number so someone I only knew in passing. The Facebook comment isn't so bad imo

Moreorlessmentallystable · 19/12/2023 17:01

Yes, if I see a person in town that I have seen once at a party, I never would have thought to ask for their number 😂 but I can see some people are it as normal.

OP posts:
Takacupokindnessyet · 19/12/2023 17:03

I don't think it odd but i guess rather one sided so the relative thought they had got along better at the joint events than the friends did.

Ladybird69 · 19/12/2023 17:07

This happened to me. My SIL found all my friends on fb after she’d met them at my party! Then she started talking to them about me! Friend nicker!

Cas112 · 19/12/2023 17:08

She's trying to make friends

Moreorlessmentallystable · 19/12/2023 17:09

Yeah I am bit wary coz another family member invited my friends for a coffee but not me...they showed up thinking I was coming....

OP posts:
Allthewallsarewhite · 19/12/2023 17:20

It sounds like she thought she had a good connection with them at the party and would like to see them again, so it's quite brave to go out on a limb and ask to stay in touch, but it's a shame when they don't feel the same way.

For the other occasion where she invited a few to coffee but not you, yes that's strange. I would think it's impolite not to invite the person that connected all.

DottyLottieLou · 21/12/2023 19:52

This is so sad. She is trying to make friends and you are making her out to be weird. Why don't you help her.

Mummingit85 · 22/12/2023 06:07

Maybe she wanted to get to know them better and didn’t realise you needed to be there too?
I met one of my closest friends through another friend, we were quiet about our friendship for a while as we knew our mutual friend would have her nose put out of joint. Then we realised, we’re adults and can be friends with whoever we like

QUIETintheSistineChapel · 22/12/2023 06:13

Or she’s a Wendy. Who doesn’t invite you but invites your friends??!!

Josette77 · 22/12/2023 06:38

She just seems friendly.

I don't really get the possessiveness people have over their friends. They spend time together occasionally. Seems natural to be friendly.

pillof · 22/12/2023 06:38

Loads on people on here complain of loneliness and trouble making friends.

Now here's a sociable woman who already has friends and is keen to make and keep even more – and the attitude from many is that she's a weirdo. Right.

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