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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be pissed off at some people's need to record every single thing on their phones?

48 replies

SantaBallsack · 19/12/2023 12:30

Dc's class had a little Christmas concert today, held in their classroom. Space was limited as the room was small, so parents were all stood against a wall while the kids were lined up on the opposite wall singing. I reckon 50% of the parents there watched the whole thing through their mobile phones, which is one thing, but there were 3 parents in particular who were jumping in front of the rest of the parents, crawling on hands and knees and generally obstructing everybody else's view so that they could stick their phone right in the kids faces to record.

I've been to a few concerts and gigs recently and it's been everywhere. People sticking phones in the air and obstructing other people's view to record things. Why do people feel the need to do it? Do they actually watch the footage over and over on their phones? Would they not be better off just enjoying it first hand while they are there??

OP posts:
squishee · 19/12/2023 13:01

Yanbu. It's everywhere. Life thru a lens.

My DSibling felt it appropriate to film part of our DParent's recent funeral service and assenbled guests on her phone.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 19/12/2023 13:25

Yanbu. I recorded a couple of things during DD's last performance (harvest festival) just a bit of a song and her talking part for DH. I felt awkward doing that and couldn't see her that clearly anyway. Same with gigs. I went to a gig where people were recording everything

Notsurehwhattdo · 19/12/2023 13:28

I try not to get too eaten up by it, otherwise my experience of seeing my child at concerts would be me looking at the people doing this, then I neither see the performance or a recording. If someone was obstructing my view I would say something, but the CF's among us must be relying on people being too meek.

CrispsandCheeseSandwich · 19/12/2023 13:50

I definitely agree it can be annoy

CrispsandCheeseSandwich · 19/12/2023 13:51

Pressed post too soon.

I agree it can be annoying but as for why, I assume a lot of the time it's for the child's other parent who isn't able to go.

MincePieForMe · 19/12/2023 13:56

It's annoying and I enjoy gigs where they specifically ask people not to film the performance. Watching a concert through a mobile phone screen is ridiculous. Watch it on YouTube. People at home aren't going to be interested in watching blurry footage of your favourite band, are they?

Children's plays though - if one parent can't attend, then a discreet recording is okay. Unfortunately though, I've had numerous acquaintances shoving their mobile phone under my nose so I can see little Belinda/Casper/Jayden singing their heart out at the nursery school nativity. It's only interesting if you know the child.

OldTinHat · 19/12/2023 14:01

I was at an 'adult only resort' this weekend. Yep, you know the one! Where the adverts show 30 somethings but in reality it's all walking aids and mobility scooters.

So, we sat at a table and the people next to us started complaining that we were too tall, they couldn't see, could we move our chairs, etc. We did move because the huffing and complaining was even worse than the sighing and muttering.

It never ends at children's nativity plays or graduations or even at funerals. People will be people and you will always want to punch them on their nose! 😂

Matronic6 · 19/12/2023 14:04

YANBU. We ask parents to model to children 'enjoying the moment' instead of watching it through their phone. Doesn't make any difference. Unfortunate as they block view of others.

Was at an exhibition the other day and a woman walked through the whole exhibition recording it and lots of people were just walking up to each painting and taking a photo before moving on to next one whilst barely glancing at the actual painting. This totally baffles me, you could just Google the paintings and see far better images than what they had taken.

flutterby1 · 19/12/2023 18:27

Life through a lens. Pathetic. People hardly watch anything back either

honeybeetheoneandonly · 19/12/2023 20:31

I'm on the fence. I rarely film and rather enjoy the moment but you forget the moment. I'm so grateful now for the few videos I have of special moments.

stayathomer · 19/12/2023 20:33

Went to a (music) concert recently and phone cut out after I’d taken one photo of the stage. It was such a release not to have it!! Totally recommended!!!

HeddaGarbled · 19/12/2023 20:36

Also, photos of meals 🤷‍♀️

Zanatdy · 19/12/2023 20:37

I used to do this at concerts, now I get a small clip of favourite songs and enjoy it live. Nice to have a little footage of kids in nativity but whole thing? No

Londonrach1 · 19/12/2023 20:41

See for me I can't see unless through the camera..I have dyslexia so see via the lense..saying that I'm at the back at my dc concert and kind other parents took photos and videos for me which I shared to two elderly parents, as I can't see it first hand as that not how my brain works..it's hard to explain. ..I also take photos of my food..love seeing other people food photos...I shouldn't be on mn should I...

Hottenan · 19/12/2023 20:43

The world we live in now sadly.

Londonrach1 · 19/12/2023 20:44

flutterby1 · 19/12/2023 18:27

Life through a lens. Pathetic. People hardly watch anything back either

It's the only way I can view it and ill see it and show family members if they ask...I'm dyslexic so not sure that's linked. I also old fashioned and print off photos then delete the image...I need physical photos and physical videos...

fuckssaaaaake · 19/12/2023 20:48

flutterby1 · 19/12/2023 18:27

Life through a lens. Pathetic. People hardly watch anything back either

Lol, I watch everything I record of my kids, way too often, I love it 🥰

eatthecheese · 19/12/2023 20:49

I'm surprised recordings/photos were allowed, not allowed at my DCs school. I'd not only be annoyed at other people filming my kids, I be annoyed at the school for allowing it to happen.

flutterby1 · 19/12/2023 20:50

The other thing I notice is that when I've done this in the past I'm not really concentrating on the show or whatever, just trying to get a good angle. So the act of filming and watching the subject through your phone somewhat takes the whole experience away.
(Yes, I'm aware it's beneficial to some)

Nowmum43 · 19/12/2023 20:51

I know two very young people who have lost their lives this past month, I say record everything you can so you have those memories to look back on. We moan about kids being on phones all the time but they are also documenting their lives.

Alarum · 19/12/2023 20:53

You’re not being unreasonable. It’s truly bizarre because I’m prepared to bet they’ll never watch the video again, with it’s crap angles and tinny mobile phone sound. More seriously, I’ve seen people film kids stuff when they’ve been expressly told not to because it might be a safeguarding issue - I’m not sure why they think the rules don’t apply to them.

Its the same at a gig - a good proportion of people filming it - I mean, just WHY???!

BalletBob · 19/12/2023 20:57

It's two separate issues. I don't think there's anything wrong with recording your kids. I love to watch back videos of mine. I feel very fortunate to have so many clips to remember the special times, and even the times that didn't seem significant in the moment but are snapshots of our life. To hear their little voices and remember the clothes they wore. I love it. That doesn't mean I wasn't also present in the moment and enjoying the event as it happened, or that I was watching it through the lens. You'd really have to be studying someone to ascertain whether they were doing that, and surely you were concentrating on your own experience so that just sounds like judgement tbh.

The second issue is being inconsiderate and spoiling other people's enjoyment by getting in the way. Obviously that's not OK, but is totally different to having an issue with people recording their own kids full stop.

jf1992x · 19/12/2023 20:59

YANBU. Drives me insane. Luckily our school has a strict safeguarding policy that stops parents taking pictures etc

Mplpurple · 19/12/2023 21:09

The best one I saw was people taking photos of slides at a grammar school open evening. The slides were about how to pass the 11+ exam. I kid you not, the slide was a few words with a photo of a rubiks cube on it. I was almost shaking with laughter. The presentation, as with almost all presentations, was handed out in booklet form at the end. I had visions of these parents ordering rubiks cubes and shoving them at their poor DC.

I do take some video of DC when I can but I don't watch it through the phone, I want to watch it live and enjoy their happiness at home too. It cheers me up.

WonderingAboutThus · 19/12/2023 21:23

I don't know why people here are so convinced those videos will never be watched.

I have terrible memory and I absolutely rewatch those kinds of very shitty boring videos all the time.