In thinking everyone has an existential crisis every now and again?....or just me?

[SlB09]

Genuinely don't know if this is just me and I need some counselling or if everyone has the moments/days in life?!!

I will caveat it's often pre menstrual but I just think about life, ageing, my parents dying, my son (whose only 6!) moving out getting married and never seeing me, feeling lonely even though I have people around. I ha recently turned 40 and don't know if that's anything to do with it but I've definitely always had these moments where my brain goes off on one!

Am I unreasonable to think most people have times like this or am I Abit wierd?!

Yes, very normal
.

Regularly!

It happens just don't go obsessing over it...let the thoughts pass...

How does everyone deal with this and not get overwhelmed? I'm generally an anxious person anyway so that doesn't help x

Most nights when I’m trying to fall asleep at the moment

Try the calm app, and listen before bed maybe?

Helps reframe the thoughts that we all have just so are stronger than others.

To me what you explain is perfectly normal human brain, we always look for problems it's the way we are all wired to survive.

I think it’s normal to think about this stuff from time to time. Not normal if you are obsessed with it and debilitated.

Yep, and have only been like this last year or so. Am mid 40s.

Both my DH and I have lost parents in recent years, and i work in a field where we have a lot of carbon and climate stuff to think about, and I don't think any of that helps either. 😵‍💫

I don't worry much about those things mine are much weirder.
Things like how insignificant an email I am sending is compared to the size of the planet.
How if my parents had had sex an hour later I wouldnt exist, but another little sperm with different genes would have made it.
How many geniuses will never be given the opportunity to flourish because they were born in the wrong country or in the wrong circumstances.
How if I was born in the middle ages I would most likely have been killed as a witch.

@AndThatWasNY now thinking what I would have been in the middle ages!!!!!

I think sometimes it is probably bordering for me Abit on the distressing side but this tends to be at hormonal times when I can't stop my eyes leaking

I think most people go through this, especially at this time of year. Year end is looming, it's dark and miserable, everyone's bustling in a panic to get the "perfect" gift ready with less money, the news on TV is awful etc. It can feel very overwhelming.

I'm having 4am 20min wide awake "catastrophe" sessions in my head every morning. I think it's my brain clearing out the junk. We've had a shit year with DM dying, a contentious probate, DH very unwell and declining, and various things going on at work. I strive to reframe to more positive thoughts and wrestle with myself to focus on what we both do have, rather than focussing on what time we have left together and all the shitty negative stuff. It's far from easy, but there is always hope. Focus on the little things that bring you happiness 💕

I have one every few years. Im not kidding!

Very normal when you are pre menstrual, menopausal or just about to experience a migraine. Just be aware this is why and push the thoughts away.

Write it all down. When you were writing about your son getting married, did you feel a bit daft?! You get a sense of perspective if you write it down.

A couple of times I've started to write a thread on here and written it all down in great detail and then looked at it and realised I'd get such a bollocking off everyone and that I had been completely deluded.

Keep a notebook with you and write down your worries. So you are worried about your parents dying. Presumably they're not that old. Think about what the concern really is there. Is it that you don't have enough friends, so that when they die you're left with no one? Is it that they help you out financially? In which case look at ways that you can future proof yourself.

My DH says I catastrophise all the time. I'm 48 & definitely peri M. My eldest going to Uni in Sept 2022 was pivotal I think. Feel like my kids are growing up & I'm just getting older (DS just turned 16). Hair going greyer/putting on weight/skin looking older/feeling tired more often. It's all a bit depressing really. My early 40s were a bit shit though with DF dying when I was 41 & my DM dying when I was 45. Trying to remain positive & book nice things in my diary for next year. It's hard though as lots of my friends have much younger kids & no money/free time so it's hard to make plans sometimes. Onwards & upwards! I like the idea of jotting down worries or intrusive thoughts 👏 maybe I'll buy myself a worry monster toy!

Really like the idea of writing things down @MILTOBE just getting it out of my brain. The parents thing I've been thinking about and probably my son thing I think is the feeling of being alone in this world but logically I have friends, my husband etc so not sure where that certain feeling/concern stems from. I guess I'm scared I won't be able to cope?? But also just the fact they are my parents and I love them very dearly! I live 60 miles away so not weirdly in their pockets but parents are parents.

@randomuser2019 I have wondered if it's a peri menopausal thing?

My parents are in their 70's but touch wood in relatively good health

Every few years here.