Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

Baby touching others

20 replies

trepanie · 16/12/2023 19:21

Wondering if I wasn't sufficiently on the ball here. DD is five months old and at a bit of a nosy stage. Everything gets a good stare/prod/suck. Met up with our friends earlier and they have a similar age baby. They popped theirs down right next to DD on a playmat so I presumed they didn't mind for the babies to be quite close. Both babies gave each other a bit of a stroke and DD seemed particularly excited, touching the other baby's face, hands etc. and kicking her legs a lot. At first everyone was saying it was sweet that they were interacting but I could sense the mum was a little on edge, particularly with DD sucking on her own fingers a lot. Whenever I saw DD putting her hands to the other baby's mouth or putting the baby's hands to her own mouth I would move DD's hand but I wondered if I was a bit slow there. It also sounded like DD put her fingers near the other baby's eyes when I was looking away.

What generally are people comfortable with when it comes to babies interacting with each other? The other baby seemed perfectly fine otherwise I would have intervened a bit quicker but maybe hands/faces are a particular no go?

OP posts:

VivaVivaa · 16/12/2023 19:26

My 5 month old has a 3 year old brother to contend with. This genuinely wouldn’t have even registered as a problem. It sounds lovely. If other baby started crying then sure I’d intervene. But if other baby was happy id let them crack on.

Housebuyer37 · 16/12/2023 19:30

It wouldn't be an issue at all for me but post covid people are bloody nuts about germs. You only have to read some of the threads on here.

There's one poster who is angry because she suspects her husband caught a cold at a football match and passed it on. I guess his crime was leaving the house never mind touching anybody.

wudubelieveit · 16/12/2023 19:37

kind of normal isn't it? no one would ever take their babies to play groups if we all had to keep babies apart. Easiest thing is to ask the other mum if you are feeling unsure .

Pickles2023 · 16/12/2023 20:02

Wouldnt of occured to me...isnt that normal development? They wont get far if they cant interact properly or touch anyone...

Id intervene if my LO went to bop them over the head with a toy, or i could see it was going to be a hair pull 😂😂

HerNameIsIncontinentiaButtocks · 16/12/2023 20:11

The other baby's mother put the kid down there, she could have just picked the kid up again. Wouldn't worry about it. If they weren't poking each other they'd just have found other things to stick in their mouths, and at least another baby's hand isn't a choking hazard. Much.

Daisies12 · 16/12/2023 20:46

Honestly you need to chill out. Totally normal. But most of MN seems to spray Zoflora over their babies constantly.

UsingChangeofName · 16/12/2023 21:09

Normal interaction, from normal babies, from normal parents.

However , you don't have to be on MN very long to know there are a lot of completely bonkers people out there.

Seagrassbasket · 16/12/2023 21:14

I think that’s totally normal and wouldn’t bother me in the slightest. You know they’re all licking each other as soon as they go to nursery anyway.

However, I met a mum in the park once who was spraying all the equipment with Milton hand sanitiser foam before her baby touched it and then spraying her hands. She looked at me like I was the bonkers one when I refused some for DS. So there are people like that out there!

Needmorelego · 16/12/2023 21:18

That's what babies do.
And toddlers.
And older kids.....
Lick each other and spread the germs and the nits.
It's life.

Babyshadows · 16/12/2023 21:21

I might have put them in more of a toes touching V shape if I were you but more because I’d worry about scratching eyes than germs. If the mum was worried then she could have moved her baby. You did nothing wrong :-)

Fionaville · 16/12/2023 21:23

It's normal. I get annoyed with people sending their kids round here to play, when they are snotty/coughing. But if two healthy babies (i.e not snotty or poorly) are interacting like this, I'd think it's a nice thing and it wouldn't bother me.

Thedogscollar · 16/12/2023 21:31

In my day this wouldn't have even been on my radar. How has so much changed in 24 yrs?
What would she have done with twins? No touching ever???

TooTender · 16/12/2023 21:35

I don’t thin you need to worry - she would have moved her baby if it was a concern for her.

TheGoogleMum · 16/12/2023 21:41

As long as it all seemed gentle I wouldn't be worried. Someone at a baby class I went to was very apologetic about their baby as he was a little rough with DS but they are under 1 and he was fine so I wasn't worried. He has an older sister who probably treats him worse sometimes (not necessarily maliciously). Having said that recently DS also had a toy smashed in his face my a friends 3 yr old - we weren't very impressed at that. The 3 yr old was not provoked, baby was in DHs arms it just came out of nowhere. But yeah hands in each others face is fine!

wudubelieveit · 16/12/2023 21:42

I remember going to a theme park that still had very extreme covid measures and was commenting to my husband "its not like people are going round licking the railings" only to see a short while later, a young child literally licking the railings....

PeloMom · 16/12/2023 21:50

I’m in the minority and wouldn’t be happy with this; might be an only child thing though. I would have expected you to wipe your baby’s hands and would have moved mine a bit.

Original poster

trepanie · 16/12/2023 22:20

Thanks, all! Sorry, I seem to be second guessing myself a bit recently. Sounds like lots of people would be fine with it (my initial reaction was that it was lovely to watch them both - they seemed perfectly content/excited!) but probably makes sense to take cues from the parents and if anyone looks uncomfortable pay more attention.

@PeloMom when you say wipe her hands do you mean before she touched the other baby? Unfortunately she's at that stage where they immediately go back in her mouth so I'd be constantly wiping. If it came to that I'd say it's probably best to avoid touching completely! But then I expect as the other mum you probably wouldn't have put them side by side as my friend did?

OP posts:

Housebuyer37 · 16/12/2023 22:22

PeloMom · 16/12/2023 21:50

I’m in the minority and wouldn’t be happy with this; might be an only child thing though. I would have expected you to wipe your baby’s hands and would have moved mine a bit.

🙄

NotSorryForTheReality · 16/12/2023 22:27

As long as no one was loaded with the cold I wouldn’t give it a second thought, I think we need to keep in mind to totally bubble wrap a child can also be harmful e.g. zero built up immune system.

Not that I would do this but I come from a generation of it being the norm to leave a sleeping baby in the pram outside (and never died 😂) it seems the world has went from one extreme to the other x

BurbageBrook · 17/12/2023 09:05

@PeloMom exposure to germs to some extent is important for gut health and immunity. That level of cleanliness could be ultimately quite detrimental to health.

Flip