To be so stressed this time of year

[Hairspray123]

Just as the title says really, married Mother of 2 under 10 year old believers. I have a fairly stressful job at times but that is no big problem at the moment and hasnt added to my stresses (fortunately). Every year I find it more difficult to be chilled and able to enjoy the celebrations through December. It feel like all other parents have it all in hand and are prepared. I just feel like with all the extracurricular activities and additional christmas celebratory things my children partake in, it is just unmanageable. The house is a complete mess even though we tey and keepnontop of it. Ive done some wrapping as and when i get chance when no child is here, which isnt often. What do other people do? Not sleep and get it all done at night? If my children were older and non believers it would be easier no doubt and I dont want to wish these magic years away. Are you crazy busy like me or so organised its no big deal?

If you are organised how do you do it?

It feels like my eldest would look back at these times as fun but mum was stressed/on a short fuse!

I think it has been made 100x worse as eldest doesnt break up until 22nd this year! Very late we are in the UK.

I have a 2 year old and 4 year old. Husband works Saturdays so we have one day a week to sort of get stuff done.

I've really cut back from what I used to do at Christmas. I used to buy a lot of gifts and spend ages wrapping them while watching Netflix Christmas movies. Obviously those days are long gone.

It is a stressful time of year but I did a few things that have helped my mental health and stress levels (you might have already done these)

I cut down the gifts we were buying. We agreed with our siblings, aunts and uncles, step aunt and uncle and step grandparents to stop exchanging gifts. Just buy presents for the remainder of our immediate families and kids. DH sorts his mum and dad's gifts.

I shove everything in gift bags.

Buy gifts online only to save time.

We don't have an elf.

No Christmas eve boxes.

Definitely no matching pyjamas.

I deleted Instagram because it was making me feel like s*. So less comparisons.

I try to ignore the mess in the house (this one is hard, but if I can't fix it I need to try to ignore it).

My son (4) is super excited for Christmas. He just wants some toys to open up on the day.

What extracurricular activities and additional celebratory things are stressing you out? Could you prune some? We went to see Santa last Saturday but just did the quick in and out version.

Caveat: It sounds like your kids are older than mine, so I might not be fully aware of the extent of the stress yet!.

we both have stressful jobs and zero time.

but what is it that stresses you re Xmas?

Weirdly it’s posts like yours that make me worry we are missing something…?
because isn’t it just ordering a Turkey and some veg and buying the kids some presents? What’s the time consuming thing?

Why can’t you just spend one evening doing wrapping in front of the tv? Why would this take forever unless you were buying for a crazy amount of people?

when my children were young and believers, I also had a full time stressful job. Out the house 7-7, Mon-Fri. I found the school activities were hardest. Getting the party wear for certain days/bloody Xmas jumpers/ nativity costumes. Then trying to go during the day to various events. I used my mum as a family rep. for school loads of times and she would even do the trips as a parent helper. She is a godsend. The rest of it is fine if you plan ahead. So start your shopping early. Be done by end November. Buy as much online as possible. The deal still is that I buy and husband wraps. Make a list of all the food shopping and treats for Xmas and order online when the Xmas delivery slots are released. You need to be quick with that one. Order wine etc. from majestic and they deliver. Local butcher for turkey and you’re sorted. If there are multiple evening shows which we used to have, I would spread them out and one of us attend at a time only. Never double up. I hope you find a way to enjoy Xmas. Get a film on and open some wine and relax.

I am feeling fairly relaxed about Xmas. In a similar situation to you. Work full time, DC5&6 don’t break up until 21st.
I buy presents EARLY. All gifts bought and wrapped before December 1st. I ask school for a list of upcoming activities, so I can prep for the majority all at once (this year 3x nativity, Christmas jumper day, Christmas fair, Christmas dinner, pantomime trip).
I take 1-2 half days in December just to give me some breathing room and allow me to attend nativities etc.
I try to keep my own activities to just those I really want to do, saying no to some invites.
This year is especially chilled as we aren’t hosting anyone.

Thank you all for your replies, I think that next year the key will be to buy and wrap everything much earlier, the wrapping especially. This year has been particularly hard to work round due to DH shifts ( I am alone 5 nights/ evenings a week, DC activities and youngest DC being a crazy toddler!

Myself and DH both work full time and we have 3 DC. Not really found it very stressful. Presents are all bought and hidden. Always wrap Christmas eve and put them straight under the tree whilst drinking a glass of wine. We do it between us and it doesn't take that long unless you've gone mad and bought loads. Food we will buy a few days before. We've organised a few Christmas events for weekends when we're off. Do you both have weekends off together? If you haven't already, get a cleaner. Wouldn't be without ours. She's a godsend for us when we're both working full time

If your DH works evening shifts, he can do a lot of the stuff in the daytime while they're at school.

Probably too late for this year, but can you take any leave, even a day or two, to crack on with what needs doing.

Definitely ditch a good proportion of what's not important. Fewer, easier to wrap presents. One or two outings etc in December, not loads.

Don't go over the top on food and get as much as possible ready prepared. Don't host every year. Switch around with parents/siblings so you're only cooking and hosting every 3/4 years at most.

This. I don’t get the stress either, unless the stressed person is struggling financially and can’t afford presents for children or extra food.

I am with you that I find it's stressful but this is the busiest time of year in my full time job too so I think that doesn't help. Half my issue is I want it all to be perfect and add loads of pressure to myself. Have tried to stop that. My husband has done more of the gift buying the last few years etc and he can wrap some of them too. I sort all the extra school activities this time of year. One thing I do is around now I take a day off while the kids are at school and check through everything and do some wrapping. One free day helps a lot!

i feel you op! This is the first Christmas in a good few years that I’ve worked full time (part time while dc were Younger) I’ve found this year really quite stressful and missed the days off I used to have to do all the running round. Throw in a few sicknesses for good measure..😩 I’m ready for a few days rest over the festive period! The run up has killed me this year!