To ask how do you keep cool and calm at work?

[mrlistersgelfbride]

I'm in a new role, supervisory level as I've got many years of experience.
2 people report to me daily.
I'm good at what I do and pretty decent at training others I think but I'm a bit of a flapper and I can be a bit highly strung and easily upset when I make small errors.
I do my best to hide this and always have done reasonably well (I think), but it comes out sometimes in day to day minor mistakes and even just the way I talk. I also stammer sometimes and I look like a fool.

How do I stay authoritative, calm , rational at work? What do others do to not get stressed?

I’m a senior nurse so have dealt with many situations that have made me panic, flap and become upset.

The best tip I was ever given is to act like a swan and imagine myself acting like a swan. So gracefully gliding whilst flapping my legs underneath the water. I find it makes people trust your judgement more and things then work smoother.

Also when you feel like this, pause, take a deep breath and remind yourself of your experience and you have and that you’ve overcomes obstacles in the past and this is just your next one.

Everyone feels like you do to a certain degree. I mean everyone. It’s part of human nature. I work in head office alongside really senior people. They stammer and make silly mistakes but they’re still really good at their jobs because they keep persevering and are able to learn from experience.

I suffer from anxiety myself and find that propranolol helps a lot when I’m at my worst.

I’m sure you’re more than capable OP and that your team believe that too, sending you lots of love you’ve got this x

Propranolol

@time4aNC Thank you, that is very helpful!
I will definitely remember the swan analogy ...very clever! Will try to put it into practise tomorrow. I really appreciate the reply.

@ssd I'm already on ADs I'm not sure this would be compatible? But thanks.

If I get a bit stressed I go outside for a quick smoke.

@vodkaredbullgirl A bit frowned upon in my workplace but I like one at night sometimes 😅

Slow your breathing down. Someone told me it’s the best way of calming yourself.

That's why I work night shifts lol

Making mistakes is honestly irrelevant. How you recover from them is what matters. Let go of the fear and anxiety of making mistakes because you know you're skilled at your job, you know you're capable, and you know you can change course and do what's needed to right the ship.

You will never not occasionally fuck up. Once you embrace that it's really liberating, and remember that the people who report to you will learn more from you fixing a problem than you doing everything perfectly all the time.

Perspective.

I have a stressful job but ultimately none of it really matters. In 100 years I’ll be ancient forgotten history, and the planet will keep spinning and the sun will rise and set. And we have insurance if I fuck up really badly, which I never have.

Flapping never, ever solves anything.

1. Breathe
2. Always take a pause before you respond - act like you're REALLY considering the question
3. Never be afraid to say, "I'm going to take that away and come back to you"

Takes the pressure off you, shows you value the challenge / feedback and you're going to give it due consideration.

There is nothing wrong with how you are, or your approach. Watch Brene Brown's discussions on vulnerability in the workplace https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o

Propranolol is compatible with a lot of the common antidepressants, such as Sertraline.

It’s a beta blocker and stops the physical symptoms of anxiety. I find this stops my anxiety esculating. However it does lower your heart rate and blood pressure which is why some people can’t take it.

Have a read up on it and if you think it’s for you call your GP. Tell them you’ve done your research and you think it could be for you and see what they say.